Polaroid Box

SAM

"So Beunka tried to convince you she was pregnant to get you back?" Thea raised an eyebrow looking at me in the rear-view mirror.

"Pretty much," I nodded.

The doctor had cleared me to be discharged, I did have to go back in a week for a check-up, and then a week after that to get the stitches removed. I was also going to have to go through at least three months of rehab to get my shoulder working well enough to play the guitar again. None of that had occurred to me last night, what was I going to do if I couldn't play the guitar? I wasn't going to be able to go to Leo's band practice, that much I was sure of.

"Hey, are you okay?" Charlie frowned.

"Yeah," I nodded.

I didn't want to tell them any of this because I didn't want them to try and make me feel better about it. It was just something I was going to have to process on my own because there was nothing that was going to feel better about until I was able to play again. Music has always been my escape, and I wasn't really sure how I was going to be able to process my feelings without being able to play.

"Are you sure?"

"I'm fine," I nodded again.

"Well we're almost home," Thea stated turning onto her street.

They had decided that I would stay with them because it was unsanitary to stay above the bar and if the boys tried to change my dressings they would joke around or not do it properly if they did it, to begin with. Jae had made a joke about Thea only knowing how to change a dressing like a nurse because she hurts herself so much. I hadn't bothered arguing, there was no point when they had both set their mind to it, and I didn't really want to be able to see Jae play his guitar at night. Nor did I want him to not play it because I couldn't.

CHARLIE

He had started slipping, he had realised what his shoulder Injury meant and he wasn't handling it well, he was trying to show that he was but I could see it all over his face that this was going to be a struggle for him. Sam was never good at hiding his feelings, they always showed through his face like a lit up billboard.

"Whose car is that?" Thea asked as she pulled up to our house.

"I have no idea," I shrugged.

We all got out, BM and Jae were already here. I had to resist the urge to help Sam, it was only his shoulder and he would feel worse if I was trying to help him with something he was capable of. Thea paused and turned around.

"I don't need help," he held his hand up to her.

"I'm waiting to lock my car," she lifted her keys, but we both know that's not why she turned around.

"Since when do you lock your car in the middle of the day, at your own house?" he countered.

"Since there is a car here I don't know and I'm overly paranoid, our group has had some bad luck lately," she shrugged.

"Right," he nodded letting it go.

We made our way inside, Jae was sitting at the kitchen table across from Bernard who was Coco's friend. He travelled with her doing a podcast, both BM and Jae listen to it; BM so he knows how Coco is, Jae because, well for the same reason but he'll tell you it's because he's bored.

"Hey," Coco smiled coming out of the spare room.

"Where have you been?"

"Here, there, and everywhere, there are a lot of people to catch up with after being away for months," she smiled.

"Are you off again?" BM frowned coming out of the bathroom.

"No, a few friends are going down south to Bernard's house for a few nights, I'll be back after that,"

"Okay," BM nodded.

"Okay?" Jae frowned.

"What? I trust Coco and Bernard won't let anything happen to her," BM shrugged.

"Because if he did you would strangle him with your big monkey hands," Thea commented.

"He does kind of have monkey hands," Bernard nodded.

"Hey," Coco smacked Bernard in the back of the head.

"What?"

"Let's go before he beats you for being rude," Coco stated hugging BM goodbye.

"Be safe, call if you need me," he stated.

THEA

"I can't believe you let her go," Jae grumbled.

"Dude she's an adult, I can't tell her to not go with her friends when I don't have an issue with her travelling around the world," BM frowned confused.

"Why are you so worried about it?" I raised an eyebrow.

"I'm not. Oh my god, you'll never guess what we found last night before BM stabbed Sam," Jae blurted out, it worked the way he wanted to because BM fell silent and was happy to change the subject rather than question him about his concern for Coco.

"What?" I asked with a sigh.

"The Polaroid box," he smirked.

"You found what now?" I froze.

I had specifically hidden that box in there stuff knowing they wouldn't check there, except that I made them go through it. That box had the only evidence, other than the photos my mother had and wouldn't let me get rid of, that I was ever fat. I specifically made sure that one of us was always missing when we want to open it just so I never had to see them again. Me and that stupid rule. I thought that it would be good for me to be able to look back and see how far I had come. Really it just reminds me of a person I hate.

"Maybe we should cook some food, buy some drinks and open the box, reminisce a little," Charlie suggested.

"Seriously?" I frowned.

"Is that something you don't want to do?" Jae raised an eyebrow.

"You know it's something I don't want to do, why do you think that I hide the damn thing in the first place?" I sighed.

"I think it's a great idea," BM nodded, glancing at Sam who hadn't said a word or really paid any attention to anything since we got home.

They were doing it for Sam's sake, well Charlie and BM were, Jae was doing it to irritate me. I let out a sigh, throwing an internal tantrum like a four-year-old, I let out a sigh. There was no way I was going to be able to say no now.

"I'll go get supplies," I sighed.

JACKSON

"Wakey wakey sunshine, you're going to be late for work if you don't get up now," I shook Jooheon's legs.

We had decided to have a few drinks and order some more food last night, it was too late and he was a little too intoxicated to go home so he just slept on our lounge. It was just easier. But he has two jobs and he works weekends. I felt bad for the guys sometimes, but he seemed to really enjoy what he does.

"What's the time?"

"Almost 12:30, you work the night shift tonight, right?"

"Yeah, I don't have to be there until 4," he yawned stretching.

"I figured this would give you time to shower, wake up a little, maybe have some breakfast?" I shrugged.

"How long have you been awake?" he frowned.

"Like three hours, I had some stuff to go over for work,"

"Where's Mark?"

"He went into the office," I shrugged.

"It's a Saturday?"

"Marketing doesn't stop just because it's Saturday,"

"I guess,"

"Coffee?"

"Yes please," he nodded getting up of the lounge and making his way into the kitchen.

"Here," I handed him a cup sitting down at the table where I had my laptop open, I was still sifting through the emails I hadn't had time to get to this week.

"Any big plans for today?" he asked sitting across from me.

"You're looking at them,"

"No plans with Thea?" he frowned.

"I mean, I'm going to call her in a minute to see how her friend is, but we have no plans to meet up or anything, not today at least," I shook my head.

"Are you playing hard to get?"

"No, she's trying to convince her friend to come with her and I asked Mark, they just haven't answered yet,"

"Why do you need people to go with you? Haven't you already met in person?"

"Not really, we only met long enough to exchange numbers, she wants to bring her friend to be safe, just in case I'm a psycho, and I thought I would brink Mark so her friend didn't feel like a third wheel,"

"You guys make things too complicated," he shook his head at me.

"Easy is boring," I shrugged.

"I guarantee you'll regret saying that," he pulled a face.

"Drink your coffee," I frowned picking my phone up from the counter.

THEA

I was walking down the snack aisle when my phone started ringing, I thought it was one of them calling me to ask for something specific, or Jae calling to insult me then add something to the list. But it wasn't, it was Jackson.

"Hey," I didn't really understand why he called when he could just text me.

"Hey, how is your friend?"

"He's out of the hospital, but I think he's realised that his injury is going to affect his ability to play the guitar for a while,"

"I'm sure he'll find something to occupy him,"

"Music is kind of his dream, it's going to be hard on him but we're all here for him so,"

"What are you up to today? Other than being a good friend?"

"That's about it actually, I'm just at the shop getting some things for us to have a few drinks and some food while we reminisce about old times and I try not to die of embarrassment," I hadn't meant to say the last part but it's not like I was good at filtering things out.

"Why would you die of embarrassment?"

"We made this box when we started high school, it's full of Polaroid photos of us all, the boys found it yesterday. So we're going to look through it," I let out a sigh.

"Why would that be embarrassing? I bet you were a cute teenager," I had to bite back a laugh.

"Some of them are just taken on an angle that isn't so flattering, and my style was questionable," there was no way I was telling him I was fat.

"I'm sure they're not that bad,"

"They're worse,"

"I don't believe you,"

"You don't have too," I shrugged.

"So, have you talked to your friend yet? I was thinking we could plan something for next weekend?"

"I haven't, but I've figured out a way to get her to agree, how's Saturday?"

"Saturday sounds good,"

BM

Sam hadn't really spoken since he'd gotten back from the hospital, he had tried to appear happy but when he thought no one was looking his smile faded and he looked deep in thought.

I think he was trying to make us all believe that he was fine and handling this, but we all knew he wasn't fine and he wasn't processing this well. Reality had clearly hit him and he had realised that the guitar was out of reach. This seemed to annoy Charlie more and she directed that at me, which I guess was fair. I could have potentially ruined any future in the music career for Sam, it felt like a tone of bricks had come crashing down on me, but that guilt was probably nothing compared to the dread that Sam was feeling.

There was a beep from the front, I was guessing that Thea was back and didn't want to carry bags. I sighed getting up to go help her, I opened the door as she reached it with handfuls of shopping bags.

"I thought you were only getting supplies?" I raised an eyebrow.

"And I did, I also realised with the back to back drama this week, we hadn't done food shopping. Now move, this is heavy," she nudged past me.

SAM

Thea was busying herself in the kitchen cooking up enough food to feed a small army while the rest of us sat at the dining table, I wasn't really sure why we were sitting here instead of in the lounge room, but I also wasn't really paying attention to what was happening around me. It's not like I didn't want to, I just couldn't seem to focus on the conversation.

I knew why they were doing what they were doing but I didn't think it was going to be any help. Some food, a few drinks, and a box full of old memories weren't going to help me forget the fact that there is a possibility I might not be able to even play the guitar the same.

I mean, the doctor hadn't said that. In fact, he had said with some rehab that I would more than likely be back to normal. But, what if the rehab didn't work? What if the damage couldn't be completely fixed? Then what?

"Sam?" Charlie waved her hand in front of my face.

She hadn't really left me alone since she got to the hospital yesterday. And if she wasn't right next to me, then she was staring at me; if this were a different situation then I would think I were dreaming and would be overjoyed. But her worry and concern weren't really what I wanted right now.

"Sorry?"

"We were just saying that we should move to the lounge room, Thea is almost done cooking so," she gave a small smile.

"Okay," I nodded getting up.

"Did you get drinks?" BM asked standing in front of an open fridge.

Thea paused and seemed to have the sudden realization that she had forgotten to go and buy the alcohol.

"No, I did not, I got distracted trying to think of what needed to be bought food wise," she frowned.

"Okay, I'll go down and get them," BM shook his head.

"I'll come for a drive," Jae started.

"Do you want anything?" BM asked. I just shrugged.

"You idiot, he's on pain medication. He can't drink with that," Thea snapped.

"I didn't ask if he wanted alcohol,"

"But it's what you meant,"

"You don't know that,"

"Hurry up and go already," she rolled her eyes.

THEA

"Wait, let's change your dressing before those two get back," I called to Sam as they went to walk down to the lounge room.

"Okay," he sighed.

He stayed sitting at the kitchen table, I retrieved the bag of medical supplies I picked up while shopping. I turned around to a shirtless Sam, now, it's not like I hadn't seen him shirtless before, but I mean damn. His back was so nice, I didn't really understand how a back could be so attractive.

"Thea? Are you okay?" Sam frowned turning around.

Seriously, his level of attractive was extremely unfair.

"Huh? Oh, yeah," I nodded walking over to him.

"Dude," Charlie smirked at me, the face she pulled insinuated that she knew exactly what I had been thinking. Or at least that I was checking him out.

"Sorry,"

"Why?" she laughed.

"What are you two talking about?" Sam frowned.

"Nothing," I mumbled.

"Thea just appreciated your naked back," Charlie dobbed me in.

"Dude," I frowned.

"What? You did," she shrugged.

"I mean, when did you get this attractive?" I muttered.

CHARLIE

"Are you sure we have to open the box? Can't we just have a movie night or a bonfire?" Thea frowned. She got really insecure when her old weight was brought up.

"We're going g through the photos, we have never gone through them before and I guarantee there are photos in here that we will all hate," BM stated.

"Not me," Jae shook his head.

"That's because all of your photos are equally as bad," Thea rolled her eyes.

"If it makes you feel any better there are a lot of photos in this box and the ones your avoiding are definitely at the bottom of the box, we probably wont to even get to them," I shrugged.

"What photos are you avoiding?" Sam asked it was the first he had joined the conversation.

"The photos from when she was huge," BM stated, he emphasized the word huge. I think he was trying to make Sam laugh. Thea paused and stared at him. BM stopped what he was doing, realizing what had just said, even Jae looked shocked.

BM froze and looked up at her slowly, she was frowning at him now. Not even Jae was that stupid, he might poke fun at her but there were just topics even he wouldn't touch. Her past weight was one of them.

Jae smirked, I think he though Thea was about to beat BM up, I kind of thought she was. But instead she took a deep breath and said;

"Why don't you go get some glasses Matthew?" he just nodded getting up and retreating to the kitchen.

"He's just taking stabs at everyone," Jae commented.

"Dude," I frowned.

"What? Too soon?" Sam kind of smiled patting Jae on the shoulder.

"Why don't we open this box before someone else gets in trouble?" Sam plastered a smile on his face.

"Good idea," Thea nodded.

"Who would like to do the honours?" Jae smirked as BM walked back in placing glasses on the table.

"Nope," Thea shook her head.

"It's all you Jae,"

"Wait," Thea stated, we all stopped and looked at her, she reached for the bottle of bourbon and mixed herself a drink. She took a sip before gesturing for Jae to continue.

BM

"Oh my God look at this," Thea burst out laughing holding up a Polaroid of me before I started working out.

"Look how twiggy he is," she continued to laugh.

"He looks like Jae," she was holding her stomach. After we had pulled out a few Polaroids and when none of them were of her overweight she relaxed a little, and drunk a lot.

That was on Jae, I think he was trying to loosen her up and make her feel better, also if she was drunk when she saw the photos of her fat she wouldn't remember in the morning. Not that he would ever admit it.

"Give me that," I sighed taking the photo from her. She was still laughing.

"Awe, look how cute Sam was," Charlie picked up a new photo

"Back when he let us attack his hair," Thea stated still giggling.

The girls have more or less always done their own hair, or at least they did before Charlie became friends with a hair stylist. They convinced Sam to let them do his a few times, this photo was taken right after they had done his hair. I looked closer and realised that he was staring at Charlie, which wasn't surprising, that was pretty much all of the photos the two were in together.

"Awe this is cute," Jae commented sarcastically, he had a photo of Charlie back when she was doing the dance performances at school.

"Ew," Charlie frowned.

"I don't remember this," Sam stated.

"This wasn't long before you transferred," I said.

"Shouldn't that be closer to the bottom?" Thea paused.

"If that box had never moved, the order has probably been mixed up with how often the box has been moved," I shrugged.

"Here, why don't you have another drink," Jae mixes her a drink handing her the glass.

It was good timing, the next photo that was picked up was Thea just before the summer she lost all the weight, it was also when she was at her heaviest. She worked really hard all summer with Drew losing the weight. Jaws dropped the day school went back and everyone thought we had a new kid. All the guys that had bullied and made fun of her all tried to get her attention.

She lost all colour and picked up the glass downing half of it. When she put the glass back down she had a smile on her face.

"I look like I ate myself," she laughed. We all knew it was fake, she did that when she felt insecure, she would make fun of herself. But we all knew that photo was killing her inside.

Jae slid it under the box picking up a new photo. Thea picked up her glass and finished its content.

"Oh my God, look at my hair," Jae frowned down at the photo in his hand.

"I remember that. We were doing our hair and Thea attacked you with bleach," Charlie commented.

"I didn't attack him, he was irritating me on purpose, I was only threatening him until he grabbed my wrists. Then I thought why not?" she shrugged.

"He didn't mind the skunk stripe, he is the one who said no when you offered to fix it," she added looking at Charlie.

"How do you feel about it now?" I raised an eyebrow.

"It's still cool," he shrugged.

He picked up a few more photos as Thea focused on pouring herself another drink, he slid the photos under the box before she saw them. I was assuming that they were more of her overweight, but he wouldn't admit that's what he was doing.

SAM

I was heading back down the hallway after going to the bathroom, Charlie was in the kitchen making herself a cup of tea.

"Oh my god," I froze.

"What?" Charlie came up behind me.

"Oh gross,"

"What are they doing?" I frowned,

"What did I miss?" BM came through the door, he'd gone into the bathroom after me.

"That's disgusting," he frowned lifting his phone to take a photo.

"What are you doing?" Charlie frowned at him.

"I'm getting photo evidence to show them in the morning,"

"Get a room," BM commented, it was supposed to be a joke, but Thea and Jae pulled away from each other and gave each other a look.

"That's a great idea," she rose to her feet, Jae followed inking hands.

"No!!" Charlie and BM stated at the same time.

BM was over there is a second, arm around Thea's waist. He pushed their hands apart and picked her up off the ground taking her to her room. At the same time, Charlie was pushing Jae down the hallway towards the spare room where she closed him in.

"The image of them is going to be seared into my brain for the rest of my life," Charlie shook her head coming back down the hallway.

"I think I'm going to throw up," BM commented coming out of her room.

"Do you have the Bluetooth printer for your phone?" BM asked Charlie.

"Yeah, why?"

"Because if the photo goes in the box, it can't be destroyed and if we're forced to remember that until we die, then so are they," he shrugged.

"Okay," she nodded going to find it.

I sat back down on the lounge and continued going through the box, there were photos in here from before I knew them, and I was curious to see them.