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FORBIDDEN LOVE- A PILE OF PAST MISTAKES.

作者: stella2138
综合
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  • 65 章
    內容
  • 4.4
    10 評分
  • NO.200+
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摘要

"Do you take this beautiful maiden before you as your lawfully wedded wife, the one you will cherish till you breathe your last? "asked the marriage official. "Yes, I..." The groom was unable to finish his reply when the whole place shook and a scary-looking woman appeared not far from the soon to wed couple. "I do not agree to this marriage," the lady said and then raised her hands to the roof and shot 4 beams of light. The whole place began to shake and guests ran away for their life. How did it come to this situation? Why is there an objection to this marriage? Find out in this interesting mystery thriller romance story that will keep you glued to your seat. --------- The cover isn't mine. All credits to the artist. Your votes, comments, and reviews are appreciated.

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Once the Crown Prince Joins In

Before his rebirth, Shang Junyan's view of Su Xinyi: Despicable and shameless, cunning and deceitful, cruel and ruthless. He dreams of divorcing her. After his rebirth, Shang Junyan's view of Su Xinyi: Beautiful and kind-hearted, open and upright, full of righteousness. He dreams of marrying her. Before her rebirth, Su Xinyi's view of Shang Junyan: Generous and understanding, steady and dependable, a true gentleman, worth marrying. After her rebirth, Su Xinyi's view of Shang Junyan: Petty-minded, pretentious, a real scoundrel, won't marry him even if she dies. In her previous life, Su Xinyi had a difficult life. She jumped from a countryside girl to the only daughter of the fourth family in Qi Country Duke's Mansion. She lived cautiously and carefully. The other three families of the Duke Mansion coveted her family's property and regarded her, who had returned to her ancestry, as a thorn in their eyes, hating her and wanting her gone. After getting married, her husband disliked her, her mother-in-law was unhappy, and they forced her to die so that her husband could marry a noble woman. Su Xinyi burned down the Pingjing Prince Mansion, so they could all die together. After her rebirth, Su Xinyi fears nothing. First, she destroys her own marriage, then she dutifully serves her birth mother, hoping she lives a hundred years. Finally, she repays the Crown Prince's help in her previous life, praising him as a good and generous person whenever she meets someone, helping the poor and uplifting the needy, a great man indeed. The great Crown Prince: I heard someone is spreading the word that I am a good person. The Crown Prince, praised into his role, finds out that the little girl who has been praising him is actually meeting someone else for a blind date, a little liar telling lies! His heart, once black as coal, gradually gains warmth because of her. In the end, the little liar marries the very successful Crown Prince whom she praised, and her scumbag ex-husband becomes the Crown Prince's servant.

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Jiang Ning limped out of her quarters one day and entered the Jiang family's second courtyard, just as the Emperor was selecting a concubine for Prince Yu.  Noble ladies from high-ranking families put in their best efforts to participate in the selection, but the flower fell on Jiang Ning, who was merely there to watch the spectacle.  Jiang Ning was confused. She dared not let Prince Yu be a scapegoat, so she tried every possible way to tell everyone she was pregnant. However, no one believed her.  When she vomited after eating, they laughed at her for feigning illness. When she felt tired, they laughed at her for pretending to be delicate. When her belly grew larger, they laughed at her for overeating.  When Jiang Ning wanted a doctor's confirmation, all eighteen doctors she consulted had the same opinion: "You're just eating too much!" The fifth prince, Prince Yu, was a dashing and handsome young man. He exuded an air of sophistication and regal beauty. This was how the common people of Chang'an City typically described him.  But the real Prince Yu was cold and ruthless, using women without any emotional attachment.  He knew that the second madam of the Jiang family was the Emperor's secret love, and he also knew that the daughter recently brought back by the Jiang family looked exactly like the second madam in her youth.  So, even though the girl had a limp, he still tossed the embroidered flower in his hand into her lap. After their marriage, he knew she was just a pawn. But for the sake of the throne, he had to pretend to cherish her even though he detested her, until...

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目錄
0 :Auxiliary Volume
1

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XOMatsumaeohana
XOMatsumaeohanaLv15

Part of a review swap, (Chapter 23) Writing Quality: 2.6- I'm being quite generous, I hope you don't mind me saying so but the writing made my head hurt. Going to offer some suggestions. Chapter 4- "In your eyes, (space should be here) am I (I should be capitalized) When you start a new sentence, make sure you capitalize your letters. Again same chapter, "just ---> Just. The same goes for names, Amanda should be written with a capital A not lowercase. Chapter 5- Over capitalizing letters is actually not good in novel writing, if you want to express yelling or screaming you could write something like this... "Will you still stay or get out?" The man said angrily as he increased the volume in his tone. (Something like this works better than capitalizing everything Spaces, don't forget the spaces between speaking dialogue - otherwise it's hard for the readers to see who is speaking. In chapter 9 you forgot to write " " - should be like this--> "Big bro ride this faster?" ** <--- This is unecessary, you don't need this. Something like this works better, ---> "I forgot to tell you that---" Brothers words fell short when a fit of coughs escaped his lips. (I can offer you more advice for this on the forums if you want. Just tag me on your thread) Update: 5/5 Story Development: I find it hard to read but I think I understand the plot line. The pacing is okay, but the lack of detail makes it hard to understand what's going on. Maybe write more about the characters thoughts and emotions. Character Design and World Background: Like I mentioned detail is needed. Character thoughts, perhaps describing their surroundings more too. There's a lot of chapters but far too short, each scene ends abruptly before I fully understand what just happened. Overall: Despite this critical review. The author however does have a plot and idea, with a lot of editing and more writing practice. I believe this story has the potential to get better, if you want any advice or need help. Please just @ me on the forums, I'd be happy to assist. On a side note, the cover is really good. It's certainly going to attract readers.

PsyberRose
PsyberRoseLv12

The novel has potential. Writing Quality: I gave it a 3* because my eyes hurt. The grammar is adequate but Author has problems with typing with Caps lock on or is unable to have proper punctuations when the Caps are not used. If it doesn't bother you, then it's fine but for me, my brain just shuts down a bit when the whole chapter is all in caps or there are no capital letters at all. Also, I find the chapters to be too short. Extremely short. It's like reading one or two paragraphs with no real context before the next chapter. I would advice Author to have about 900 words at least? It would allow you to develop the characters more, and also not frustrate your readers who may be waiting for an update - only to get a paragraph or two without anything new. Stability of Updates: Too soon to tell but I gave it a 5* in good faith. Story Development: 4* - It's getting there. The slow romance is not a problem or how it develops is not a problem. I can't really comment on Character Design or World Background even though I've read until Chapter 38 before doing the review. I normally read about 10 - 20 chapters to get a feel. However, since the chapters here were really short, not much progress or insight to the characters could really be seen even at this point. Still, I gave it a 4* for the potential it has. It is best if you look through your chapters before posting it. Sometimes, re-reading what you wrote can give you more inspiration besides spotting mistakes. All the best, Author.

stella2138
stella2138作者
Derty145
Derty145Lv3
Derty145
Derty145Lv3

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