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Experimental Log of the Crazy Lich

This is the story of a crazy lich who possesses an internal game system and brings catastrophe to the entire world. “Let’s look at the daily quests today… it’s the damned choose one-of-two-options-type again. Destroy a town with a population of 30,000 people or above; reward: 10,000 evil points. Steal lollipops from 3 children; reward: 1 evil point. If neither of the quests is completed, then 2 points will be deducted.” “Tsk! You think I’m stupid? If I really destroyed a town, a crusade of Myth-ranked Holy Knights would definitely come hunting me down. Even if I earned the points, there wouldn’t be any life left in me to spend them. I better just go be a kindly lollipop bandit.” I’ve already had enough of being a notorious lich. Who says a lich can’t be a good person? I’m definitely going to beat this damned system and be an upright and dignified good man.

Angry Squirrel · 奇幻
分數不夠
841 Chs

Truth and the Half-Demon

The pale yellow flame of the oil lamp danced along with the wind. Not too far away in the hall, the singing of bards could be heard. The wind brought along with it the sweet and fragrant scent of alcohol, the sound of the snoring of drunkards and the sound of chattering. This atmosphere really made one drunk on it and it felt that it would be a good place to reminisce about some old memories.

"Dang." Throwing out an enchanted gold coin, it formed an invisible barrier that blocked off all possibilities of someone spying on us.

Some things had to be accounted for. Then, where should I even start from?

Let's start with the usual mess. The accursed Chaos and the heartless Order, which threw all races and lifeforms into their Eternal War.

Just like what I've said before, this war had no end. Then, why did it have no end? Going by logic, a thing like war should stop when both parties suffered losses beyond a certain acceptable range.

To explain that, we had to start from the origin.

Life, death and the never-ending reincarnation.

I already mentioned before that each lifeform, after their departure, if they believed in the Gods of Order, their soul would be guided to the Pillar of Heaven and follow it all the way up to the Heavenly Realm where the Gods of Order dwelled. They would then become a Devotee who served as a source of faith for the Gods, become a God Envoy or God Attendant who fought for them. Among them, the strongest were the different type of War Angels.

Basically, if you believed in a certain god, you became a member of his Heavenly Realm. Devotees were the lowest-tier existence in the Heavenly Realm, their only job was to pray continuously to provide the power of faith for the gods. Then, if a Devotee was unable to provide any more faith, they would be abandoned and send back into the cycle of transmigration.

As for the Chaos faction, it was technically the same thing. Just that, compared to using the 'honor and embrace of divinity' to 'guide the pure souls into Heaven that was free of worries', the means of the Chaos Abyss were much more violent.

The endless River Styx passed through countless dimensions and using the words of the Order faction, 'the cursed souls of the sinners will suffer the pain of the corrosion of their souls for eternity'. In reality, the nature of souls tended towards Chaos and any souls that didn't believe in the Gods of Order would fall into the River Styx after their death. However, because souls that tended towards chaos were normally selfish and reckless, calling them sinners wouldn't be that wrong as well.

Continuing, the souls of those who died in the Chaos faction would follow the flow of River Styx through countless worlds and dimensions. If the soul was attracted by the world's laws, then it would climb to shore, returning back to life.

For example, if they were to climb onto the shore of the main battlefield of the Eternal War, the Ten Thousand Abyss Plains, then, the evolution of the new soul would most probably be a bloodthirsty battle Demon. If they climbed up on a Ragefire Scorched Plains, full of Black Chaos Inferno, then the new soul would most probably become a fire-elemental Demon and the final form of their evolution would probably be the strong Fire Demon Balrog.

Of course, there were also worlds and dimensions that tended towards the good. Quite a lot of swindlers, immoral business men and thieves (who failed to steal anything) reincarnated into the cunning and evil but promise-keeping Devils. On the other hand, the souls of serial killers, burglars and different type of violent criminals reincarnated into Demons who were said to be the incarnation of Chaos itself.

In reality, before climbing to shore, the River Styx would have already completed the transmigration between life and death. The Demons and Devils who climbed onto shore were a brand-new life which required the consumption of other life for a living. The survival of the fittest was the only rule and evolving to become stronger before a predator beyond their means appeared was their only means of survival.

The Demons and Devils who climbed up from the River Styx had already lost their memories from the time when they were once mortals. The only thing on their empty brain was the primal desire to consume and evolve. Every Demon who had evolved to a certain level would have already had to consume countless of their brethren.

Talking to them about order, the beauty of peace and cooperating for survival was equal to talking to a criminal, who depended on fighting and stealing to become influential, about the harmony of society and helping others being a joy. Wasn't that basically denying the value of their entire existence?

Demons could evolve into Demon Nobility and after grasping their true name, they were able to regain the memories from the time when they were a mortal. However at that point they would already have an entire new set of values for the world and their previous memories would probably seem like how mortals imagined themselves to be the main character of a certain novel or movie. It wouldn't have much of an effect on their personality and the new experience and knowledge could instead make them more cunning and difficult to deal with.

Even the stronger Fire Demons, the Balrogs, who were able to slay a dragon individually, were only considered a normal member of the Demons. Demon Nobility, even if it they were of the weakest rank in the hierarchy, a Baron, were still an existence that would be able to suppress a Balrog with just a single hand. It was said that their nobility was granted by the Goddess of Chaos and the Chaos Abyss itself. For example, a Demon Prince which was only a slightly higher rank than a Demon Duke may seem like nothing much but in actuality, it was almost equal to the godson of the Goddess of Chaos and was an existence equal to a Main God of the Order faction…

Fortunately, the Demon Nobles, due to their great strength, were unable to head to the Eich continent normally. Even if they were to send an incarnation down, it would normally be surrounded and destroyed by the God Envoys and incarnations of the Order gods.

Of course, not every soul that tended towards Chaos would became a Demon or Devil. A large portion of souls would find themselves being unable to climb to shore and only when the River Styx reached the very end of the Chaos Abyss could they be reincarnated.

Alright, since there was life, there was bound to be death. The souls of the dead were constantly reincarnating to become the new soldiers for both factions. Naturally, the Eternal War would therefore be never-ending. These were all the laws of this world and similar to how 'the sun rising and setting or seawater being salty' considered common knowledge.

But a hundred years ago, a man had tried to break this rule.

He had tried to make it so that the sun would never rise again. He had tried to make all the living die and build a country for the dead. He had tried to make the Holy Light disappear for good… He had been… Lord Yongye, yes, the me who was a frenzied chuunibyou back then.

Cough, since it can be considered my dark history, I shall speak less about it. No matter how hard I tried to refute it, Lisa had died, because of my army, at the hands of one of my most capable Four Heavenly Kings, Bone Dragon Queen Gray Sin, which was equivalent to having died by my own hands. I, who had been at my pinnacle then, couldn't accept the fact that I accidentally killed one of my companions. So, I had tried to challenge the common sense of the world and alter life and death.

To the me back the it was clear, was just raising someone up to became an undead, they would still be dead, making the act meaningless. If I wanted to revive someone, then it had to be a revival true to the word.

The souls of the dead would lose their memory and everything else in the River Styx. But this required time. After all, even though the water of River Styx was fatal poison to any life, for it to took effect swiftly, it had to be absorbed into the body.

So, if I were to use Divination Magic to look for Lisa's soul and pull her out of the River Styx before the water started taking effect and recreate a physical body for her…

This wasn't a theory that I came up with, but a classical joke that spread among Mages. This was because despite being feasible theoretically, River Styx could corrode any soul that it came into contact with. Since it couldn't be touched, so how could one pull a soul away from it?

Even the Great Demons, who could use secret methods to gather the water from River Styx to create medicine did not dare not touch River Styx directly. They definitely had no desire to start evolving from the lowest demons again… Falling into the River Styx was also considered one of the most cruel curses in the world of Demons.

However, this concept would have to be corrected. River Styx was the river of souls in this world and also the creator of all living beings. Indeed, she could make any souls from this world sink into its depths, but what if the soul didn't belong to her and came from another world… For example, a Transcender from a foreign world.

Back then, I had also been dripping with cold sweat. Fortunately, my purely theoretical theory had proven to be correct. Yet, reality had also proven that this drop of fortune was the start of a much greater misfortune…

"You are INSANE!!! You've challenged the Natural Order which all of the Gods have acknowledged, you've provoked the dignity of both the Malevolent Gods of Chaos and the Gods of Order!!"

The gigantic dragon's shock and her roar was just beside my ear. What could I say other than nodding my head bitterly.

"Yes, now that I recall it, I was rather crazy back then. I must have been really be mad to try to totally break the boundary between the living and the dead. Hehe, if it happened once, then it could happen again. If the dead weren't reincarnated successfully, then with what could the Order and Chaos continue fighting with? Both parties definitely wouldn't have allowed me to continue causing anymore havoc."

Little Red gulped down a large mouthful of alcohol.

"Sooo…Who did you meet? The descend of a true God? If it was just an incarnation, then you should've been able to escape even if you couldn't defeat him."

"Death God Ayer, the very first Undead, the most ancient God."

"Pa da!" The alcohol bottle immediately shattered on the floor as the fragrance of the alcohol leaked out. Ancient Red Dragon Einz Mezus widened her mouth, allowing the alcohol to flow freely down her mouth. That kind of idiotic look was really rarely seen.

"Hey hey, image, image. If this silly look of yours were to be leaked, then how will you marry in the future?"

I tried to warn her kindly but I ended getting pulled up by her and she stared directly into my eyes.

"YOU. STOP. JOKING. In the million years of history of our Dragon Tribe, that man has only made a move thrice and his opponents had all beentrue Gods! Did you think that you were really that amazing? You were only a SemiGod Undead Emperor of recent times, there have been much more, stronger than you in ancient times. You totally lacked the qualifications to make that man move."

The questioning words came out one by one. Both of her dragon eyes were filled with disbelief and suspicion.

"I. Am. Not. Joking. It really WAS Ayer, the most ancient God. The super old senior who once followed the Goddess of Chaos and Goddess of Order, the oldest king of the ancestors of Devils, the Mountainous Human Tribe, and the oldest Death God who granted intelligence to all Undead."

"Then why are you still here prancing about? I don't think that a SemiGod like you would be able to escape from his hands. The true Gods who he had set his eyes upon had all fallen and you, who was just a SemiGod Undead Emperor back then, what made you so special, for you to still be able to stand in front of me?!?!?!"

Remembering the gray figure that represented death itself, the blood rose-colored ring on that pale white finger, I couldn't help but shiver. I also agreed that it must have been a miracle that my soul hasn't disintegrated then.

"…Now that I recall, Death God Ayer never was one to answer the prayers of the undead. Perhaps, he's a representation of Death itself. Or maybe, that was his Concept of Existence and his Obligation 1was to maintain the order in death itself, that is to say, as long as nothing interferes with the River Styx and the souls of Order from returning to their Gods, then he would definitely not have made a move. Back then, I had tried to interfere with the River Styx, which was as good as stepping on his boundaries. It really was a suicidal move."

I unconsciously sipped a mouthful of alcohol but ended up looking frustrated at the alcohol dripping down from my lower jaw, wetting my shirt. I shook my head and smiled helplessly. It had been my worst defeat in this world.

"He only used an incarnation, which only struck out once, and he managed to easily send me kneeling with my soul almost destroyed entirely. My rank drop frantically. Ever since then, I terminated the possibility of an undead rising up, becoming a true god, because it meant having to defeat Death God Ayer. For countless years, the seat of Death God has never changed, showing that overcoming this man is an impossible task."

"… No wonder Adam and Margaret managed to defeat you back then. That buffoon had been taking it to heart and suspects that you secretly went easy on him. I never expected that you were so badly injured then."

"Hehe, since an Undead Empire cannot be built and the Demon King route is destined for failure, so why not pass on the glory of being defeated as the Demon King to my brother. However, since my rank had dropped frantically, flaws appeared in my initial plans. Margaret had seen through my plans and I went from faking my death to almost really dying. I guess it could be considered the only accident."

"You haven't told me how you escaped from Death God Ayer!!"

"… You are wondering why the Undead Empire cannot be built? It's actually pretty simple. From Ayer, I found out that the Gods of Order couldn't possibly allow the undead to replace all of the living. If they succeeded, the cycle of life and death would be broken. An Undead Kingdom which doesn't extend beyond half of the world is already the limits of what was deemed acceptable to them…"

An irresistible brute force struck me on my brain and Little Red's word by word question thundered in my eardrum.

"I. AM. ASKING. YOU. HOW DID YOU ESCAPE FROM AYER? STOP CHANGING THE TOPIC! AND STOP TALKING CRAP."

The Soulfire in my eye flickers and finally, I helplessly revealled the truth.

"I can't say it… I really am unable to say it… This is all for your sake."

The dragon girl's head tilted and she pouted, her mouth, her face filled with disdain.

"Hmph, I can guess it all the same even if you don't say it out loud. It must have been your specialty in spouting bullshit. Ayer, who doesn't belong to any faction of Gods is a well-known rebel. He's probably like you, unhappy with the current world, so you might have conspired some sinister plot with him and come to an agreement, such as to overthrow the current order…Wuuuuwuwuuuu"

The words that would have come afterwards couldn't be allowed to be spoken out anymore as I stuffed my bones right into her mouth.

After being assaulted so suddenly, her black eyes were full of rage. Then, after seemingly having comprehended something, the anger changed into shock before turning into panic and fear.

"I, I, I… I couldn't have hit the jackpot?? Tell me that this isn't real. Lord Ayer, please spare me. I am still young and unwed. I haven't raised any small dragons and I don't want to be silenced!!!"

"Calm down, you don't know anything. NOTHING at all. Why would Ayer come find you? You were just sitting here today chatting with me. You didn't guess anything at all, you didn't think of anything at all!"

Under my consolation and persuasion, she finally calmed down after a long period of time.

"Un, remember it. I don't know anything at all. You didn't say anything as well. The Dragon God above, I won't guess anything ever again."

"Don't say it, you really mustn't say it." I nodded my head and wiped the cold sweat that didn't exist. This lass… why did she have to be so good at guessing randomly. She really had the ultimate crow beak2 with a loose mouth.

"Right, so what's the deal with Elisa? Why would Lord Ayer let her off?"

Since this was an obvious attempt for changing the topic, I wouldn't pass up such a good opportunity.

"… While I was pursued by Ayer, I randomly transported Elisa to a faraway place. When I finally recovered my ability to move, it has already been 3 days later. However, Elisa had already started her fight for survival within rubble and was long since corrupted by the laws of the dimension changing her into a half-demon. What was left was for me to settle her down then afterwards, she was brought to Sulfur Mountain City and you should know the rest."

"Half-demon?... That shouldn't be. Normally, half-demons are the offspring of Demons and when their bloodline finally awakens, they are able to undergo a ritual to awaken their demonic blood to gain more strength. For Elisa who hasn't converted from a dead to be corrupted into a half-demon half-human existence by the world's laws, it might seem to not differ much from normal half-demons but in actuality, they are different down to the core."

I hesitated for a moment. Based on her understanding of the laws, Little Red made her own judgement.

"No wonder you said that she's Lisa but at the same time, isn't Lisa as well. The original Lisa has already died and the current Elisa should only be a fragment of her soul which was converted into a half-human half-demon. Really one-of-a-kind in the entirety of Eich."

"Indeed, Ayer has also told me that a person is completely dead the moment they touch the River Styx. Those who climb to shore afterwards are newborn from the original material. Even now, the Chaos Abyss's still continuously calling for her soul, attempting to convert her completely into a demon. She came to shore on the Ragefire Scorched Plains so if she were to converted, she should become a fire-element Demon. So, I started teaching her Ice Magic as the nemesis of fire so that she could resist the corruption coming from her core."

"You sure are dumb, ending up empty-handed in the hand. You even almost paid with your own body."

"I have nothing to refute your words. It was the dumbest thing I've done in my whole life. But, I don't regret it in the least."

"Have you ever regretted anything in your life? ... Don't talk about regrets, I haven't even seen you depressed before."

After thinking about it for a while, countless sad memories flashed through my memories and finally, I smiled.

"Nothing. I've considered every choice I've made seriously, and in everything I did and tried my best until the very last moment, even if it ended up in failure. There is nothing for me to regret. Regret only denies the life that I have led so even if I failed along the way, I just have to total up my experience and try harder the next time."

"Hmph, of course you aren't one to regret anything. Now you have another maid whose mind is all on you. Ha, isn't this just like the past, Adam that rascal having a crush on Lisa but Lisa only looking at Team Leader Rolo."

"Can you stop mentioning the pot that didn't open3? I am still quite vexed over it. Initially, I thought that there would be a chance this time but in the end, Elisa and Lisa's taste are exactly the same, a total lack of feeling towards Adam."

"Does Adam know?"

"You think that he wouldn't be aware? That fellow may only have 9 points in intelligence but his instincts are really outrageously accurate."

"Just like how he knows you are his Big Brother Rolo but chooses to act dumb?"

"Actually, I'm not sure about that either. Some matters, if you expose it, it will only end in awkwardness. Sometimes, it's better to just act dumb. As for Elisa, he did come talk to me about it but he only said 'Elisa is Elisa, Lisa is Lisa. Lisa is dead and so is my heart'.

"I suddenly feel sympathy for Adam."

"I also feel sympathetic for Margaret. Looking at the situation, Adam has been on a single-sided crush for most of his life as his subconscious continuously beauties his memories, making Lisa a perfect full stop in Adam's heart. He's just putting his memory on replay and beautifying the image of the past Lisa in his mind. He's instinctively rejecting anyone from entering his world. How could the living defeat the dead? Margaret's hard work is destined to go to vain… Why are you looking at me so weirdly, have I said something wrong?"

"No, I am just a bit shocked how true a certain saying is."

"What saying?"

"Old virgins tend to cherish woman, even if the woman doesn't belong to him. Tsk tsk, Margaret may have a sharp tongue but she's soft inside. Back then, despite you being superior than Adam in all aspects, being good-looking, strong and steady in how you settle things. You even had a kind of depressing aura when you were alone which attracted silly girls. That dumb lass Lisa wasn't willing to leave you alone but Margaret seems to be unable to give up on the Adam who's going around causing trouble like a pitiful dog, helping clean up after him for half of her life. Finally, after having such a difficult love for more than half of her life…"

Holy Knights made a living off their face, it was impossible for them to be unskilled in flirtatious words, otherwise how could they receive plentiful donations. As for the depressed image, when I devoted my body and soul to defeating an opponent out of my league for revenge, it was natural that I would end up depressed.

"Tsk tsk, hehe."

"Why are you laughing so hysterically? Did I say anything wrong?"

"No, I am just surprised over how true another saying is. 'Even an overage spinster would becomes a love expert in endless procrastination and matchmaking' !"

Sparks were fired between the two pair of eyes and finally, it turned into a pair of helpless sighs. After all, this certain weak spot would just result in both of us suffering mutual damage.

Suddenly, the pair of dragon eyes lit up and Little Red hugged me, even intentionally placing my head in front of her chest. The scent of alcohol on her body and the soft sensation made me feel a bit weird…

"Why don't we, the left behind male and female, form a group together?!"

The snow-white flesh pressed down on me. Fortunately, I no longer needed to breathe, or else…

This… This WAS a confession!!!? The first time in history? My… was my springtime finally here? Was I finally going to have my first romance in my entire life?

Before I could even think of how to reply in confused mind, a familiar cold laughter sound could be heard from my back.

"Hmph, I sensed that master used a barrier and here I was worried that you might be in some trouble, so I rushed here all the way. Turns out you were just eating and flirting here. Hehe, a romance between a skeleton and a giant lizard, really makes one be at a loss for words. Maybe I should inform the Sulfur Mountain City Daily Newspaper and playwrights so that the citizens can have some juicy news to gossip about and the concert hall will have a new romance play."

If I could still sweat, I would be drenched in cold sweat by now.

As for Little Red, she was already rolling on the floor laughing. Obviously, the confession was just a show she staged after sensing the arrival of Elisa so as to do me in.

Somehow, disappointment and sadness welled up in my heart and the fact that I wavered for a moment just now made me really feel like dunking my head into the alcohol barrel. The knife-like glare also made one feel like running away.

"I… I, Ultraman is fighting with monsters, I must go and assist him!!"

Leaving behind some hysterical words, I immediately escaped, missing out on the battle between the women behind my back.

"I… Master is mine…"

The declaration she made after bucking up her courage only received looks of sympathy from the other party.

"It was a younger sister in the past. This time, he probably regards you as his daughter. Your fate with him seems quite pitiful. Good luck, even though the route is long and highly impossible."

"I won't admit defeat, even if the opponent is you!" She seemed to regard the pity of the other party as the easygoing-ness of a person with the winning ticket in hand. The declaration this time was filled with anger.

"Don't worry, I've no interest in that pile of bones. Even though Roland suits my appetite, but my goal is to have a bunch of little dragons. I could reluctantly accept a dragon offspring with mixed blood but he can't even offer me that… also I'm not a necrophile."

Shaking her hand to signal Elisa to leave, the black-eyed black-haired dragon lady continued her way of drinking that would put a dwarf to shame. Her entire head was submerged directly into the alcohol barrel and gugu, only the sound of liquid flowing could be heard.

When the confused Elisa walked out of the tavern, she caught sight of me, who had been dazing off at the entrance.

"Is this the ending for someone who shoots their mouth? Indeed, I really have an extremely inauspicious mouth. Hehe, so this world really does have Ultraman fighting monsters."

In front of me was a humongous goblin robot. It was 20-meter tall with 2 heads, one of them being a fire-spitting dragon, which following my advice was dyed red and even had a horn on top of it. As for the left and right arm, those were gigantic screwdrivers!

The fully-armed robot was fighting against the Town Security and furthermore, they had an overwhelming advantage due to the humongous size of the robot.

"The Wise Lord Roland, your ideas were really incredible. Look, this is the product of the collaboration of the engineering of both Dwarves and Goblins. To thank you for the inspiration and contribution, we have named him Roland No.2!! Praises of your wisdom and your unique thoughts will be sung by Dwarves and Goblins to come."

The sound of the shouts from the microphone spread throughout half of the entire Sulfur Mountain City. In that instant, I knew that I would be on the wanted list of Sulfur Mountain City the very next day.

"Little Red, I take back what I just said. I… I'm regretting what I said!! Who could have predicted that those lunatics would take my words for real and actually construct it?!"

That large robotman was fighting while small explosions happened on its body. The next instant, a goblin and a Dwarf jumped out to put out the fire and after a few knocks, Roland No.2 was ready to fight on.

"Boom!" The Big Ben of Sulfur Mountain City just became a part of history.

"Boom!!" The Watch Room that was doomed was really doomed now.

"Boom!" "Boom!" "Boom!" After consecutive explosions, the Town Security Headquarters which had been rebuilt only 2 weeks ago turned into rubble once more…

Looks like I won't just be on the wanted list, I was sure to end up straight on the top of the list.

Without hesitation, I turned to face Elisa and told her:

"…Inform everyone on the list that tonight, we are packing our luggage and escaping in the night… No, I meant, we are heading to the Underground Alliance!!"

Reedited by Devils_Advocate

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