WAR OF HORMONES

"I miss you..."

"I really miss you..."

"Sooyoung-ah!!"

Hyunjae opened his eyes quickly. He stared at the ceiling with his eyes opened widely. He held his breath long as he felt a heavy feeling hit on his chest. He put his hand on his chest slowly. He felt his heart beating speedily. He blinked his eyes several times, realising that he just returned to his reality. The only sound he heard now was his aircon. The sky was already bright and the sun already greeted the day. He wakes up and sat on his bed. For a few seconds, he tried to gather himself. He rubbed his face and wiped his tears that fell onto his face. Slowly, we pulled his pale white blanket to his body. He let it hugging his body and allowed the warmth travelled into his soul. He hugged his two legs under his blanket and put his forehead on the knees. He closed his eyes, recalling his dream that once was his reality. After a few seconds, without any sound, his tears rolled onto his face while his eyes still closed.

"I miss you, Sooyoung-ah..." Hyunjae whispered to himself.

OCTOBER 17, 2014

"Hyunmin-a, let go to a blind date," said Hyunjae to his younger brother.

His 2 years gap younger brother glared at his brother, "What about the girl you met with me last month?"

Hyunjae smiled, "I like her but I don't think she likes me".

Hyunmin shook his head. He knew his brother crazy over women. He changed his girl on monthly basis. Only his first love was the most serious girl that his brother ever dated. It lasted for 2 years since high school. They broke up while his brother serving in military and she had to leave Ilsan to further study in the USA. His brother was so broken-hearted because he can wait for her to complete her study, but the girl happened to be in a relationship with his university classmate. Since that time, his brother be never serious in love. Even so, he really excited meeting girls on every single time. Hyunjae is really handsome, no doubt. That's why he has many girls around him. He's kind and funny too. But, Hyunjae broke too many hearts already which made Hyunmin headache with him.

One time, a girl came crying to their house to stop him breaking up with her. She was even willing to pay their mother if their mother can help her to unite and be together again with Hyunjae. None of them knows how Hyunjae knew this girl. But looking at the girl, she looked gorgeous. Nothing wrong with her that made Hyunjae wanted to leave her. As a man, Hyunmin acknowledged this girl capable in attracting a lot of men. Her visual and body was great. She seemed very loyal to Hyunjae too. The only problem with her was she seemed to be a little clingy and desperate. When she willing to pay their mother, it left a bad impression. Their mom got really angry and chased her out. It was ridiculous to pay the mother just to date the eldest son of this family. But the girl didn't give up and even paid the driver to let her break into the house to meet Hyunjae. Thank God the housemaid caught her and told the father. It was really funny to him that their father and housemaid were the one that comforting the rich girl and told her to give up. The girl finally gave up after her father found out about it through her own bodyguard. It was one of an unusual scene that happened to them because of Hyunjae.

Hyunmin knew Hyunjae is a good man and not a playboy. He's closed with many girls to the extent they thought they are dating him because of the way he treated them. To other people, going to blind date means they want to have a love relationship with them. But to his brother, he just wants to build social networking, flirting around and have fun to hide his lonely and wound from his first love. He never sleeps with any of them and just hangs out on regular basis.

Hyunmin sighed and responded to Hyunjae request, "Jae hyung, I really want to be serious with the girl I met with you before this. I won't go to any blind date anymore".

Hyunjae smiled cheerfully, "Really? Wow, congratulation! Ah...my life is getting boring. Even my brother date someone"

Hyunmin threw his blanket to Hyunjae, "Then go date someone. The girl we met last time is quite sexy".

"She's okay, but not the right person," Hyunjae replied short.

"You only met her a few times," Hyunmin replied short.

Hyunjae commented, "Yeah, but I want to marry someone who loves herself more than me, but still want to be by my side".

Hyunmin looked at his brother softly. He knew he talked about his first love. "Okay...i hope you will meet her soon. I'm tired of going on a blind date with you. I fought with my ex because of you. Ah, hyung. Can you help me return the kimchi box to my ex?". Hyunmin suddenly remembered.

"What? Why me?" he surprised.

"I'm awkward around her and I forgot to return it for 3 months already," Hyunmin said.

"Oh hohohooo....the girl who still cannot move on, right?" asked Hyunjae laughing.

Hyunmin sighed annoyingly while looking at the mirror and brushed his hair, "Oh. She asked for a breakup, but she's the one cannot move on from me. I texted her already to meet at the park. You go there in 1 hour. I'm going to the part-time job now. Bye". Hyunmin leaving right after he instructed his hyung.

"Yah! Then why did you plan to meet in one hour when you already knew you have a part-time job to do?" Hyunjae screamed at Hyunmin who quickly leaving their house.

"Ah...troublesome kid," Hyunjae murmuring and started his PC to waste his time playing a game.

2 hours later he felt hungry and went to the fridge to find food. He saw kimchi box in the fridge. He just realised that he was late and supposed to meet his younger brother's ex. He was already late for an hour. He rushed to the park by riding his bicycle. Right after he reached there, he didn't find the girl. He waited for almost 30 minutes before he overheard someone phone calls behind him.

A girl with a long brown hair, wearing a white snap cap and red cheerleader outfit. Her face looked so soft but sexy. She's definitely not his style as he prefers a cute girl with a wavy short haircut. But for some reason, that girl looked very attractive to him. Hyunjae lost in his mind staring at the girl until she raised her voice on the phone which surprised him.

"Yah! I cannot wait for your kimchi box anymore. You find him yourself. I'm busy!" she dropped the call and mumbled alone angrily.

The girl about to cross him, Hyunjae stood and blocked her from leaving. " Excuse me, you are.....", he initiated the conversation. At first, he stunned looking at her beauty. But he definitely knew this girl is someone who acquaintance to his younger brother's ex. The girl looked at Hyunjae up and down. She noticed the kimchi box inside a canvas bag he held.

The girl glared and asked him rudely, "Ah....so you are the stupid ex of my cousin? I really want to kill you now, but I'm really rushing now. You are lucky. So please move," she grabbed the bag and pushed Hyunjae's shoulder with her shoulder hard.

Hyunjae was left speechless and shocked by how a beautiful girl like her spoke and acted so rudely to him. Usually, girls shy away from him. But this girl didn't even look at him and mad at him for being late. He wasn't even able to say sorry to her for being late. But...this girl was so great from the front and back, from head to toe. A perfect girl. He smiled looking at the unknown girl walking away until she was gone from his sight. He returned home thinking about the girl who left a big impression on him.

That night Hyunjae couldn't sleep properly. His mind keeps on thinking about the girl. He didn't know whether he felt sorry to her or curious why she acted like that to him. It's understandable she got mad waiting for almost 2 hours. But, she didn't even allow him to speak or explain something. And...that girl makes his heart beating so fast for no ultimate reason! Whether this is just lust or love, he had a strong desire to approach the girl. Deep down he prayed in his heart to meet her again until he fell asleep.

A day after, Hyunjae woke up very late. He was hungry but Hyunmin left their house too early without anything left that he can prepare. So, he went to a restaurant for a lunch. It was a boring day. But little did he know that the sky heard his prayer, he accidentally bumped to the girl he met yesterday. Today she walked in the restaurant wearing high heel. She wore a peach short dress, exposing her bare skin and long legs. Her wavy hair makes her looked elegant but sexy. She's so beautiful. He couldn't take off his eyes from her. Just her presence drives him crazy and triggering his man's hormone. Just looking at her made him feel like receiving the best gift in the world. He really thought he finally met his destiny.

Hyunjae walked closer to her and blocked her way. She looked at him. Hyunjae waved his hand and greeted, "Hello".

She made a clueless face and just bowed her hair. She left him again. Hyunjae smirked and laughed by her attitude. He turned around and chased her again. He used whatever he had to attract her attention. The girl started to feel annoyed at him because he keeps on blocking her way and disturbed her. He tried to talk to her, but she glared at him and ignored him. She ended up running to the restaurant kitchen to hide as a customer are not allowed to enter the kitchen area. Because of that, he was very lucky as he found out that she's the restaurant owner's daughter. He smiled evilly. got a plan in his head. He knew he had to make a move slowly.

To Hyunjae, ignoring him wasn't a rejection but a challenge. This girl wasn't an easy girl. He returned home feeling excited. He cannot control himself. He wanted to know this attractive girl. He told Hyunmin on the same day everything that happened to him. However, Hyunmin strongly against him since he had a bad term with them. But Hyunjae told Hyunmin that he knew himself better than anyone. He knew after he got the girl, they will end up just a fling like other girls. He was never really serious since his relationship with his first love. Hyunjae tried to convinced Hyunmin by saying it won't be serious. However, deep down he unsure where this feeling will lead. Hyunmin still against it but Hyunjae insisted to make the girl as his girlfriend.

From that time onwards, Hyunjae visited the restaurant almost every day just to see her. Although he's still looking for a job, he didn't mind spending money to the restaurant. On his way to the girl's restaurant, he saw the girl with her friends outside accessories store. He greeted the girl, " Hye!".

The girl glanced at him. Before she'd answer, her friends came and asked smilingly looking at a handsome guy in front of her friend, "Who's this guy?".

She hesitated to answer, "Oh...he's...".

"...future boyfriend," Hyunjae replied quickly while smile naughtily at her. All her friends woo at both of them, impressed with Hyunjae's confident. The girl flipped her hair to the back while relieving a huge burdensome sighed.

Hyunjae smiled before he told her, "Tell me what you want right now. I'm giving it to you right now". Hyunjae acted like he really going to be her man. Whatever this girl wanted, he will give everything to this girl right now. But this girl didn't reply to him. Instead, she purposedly took so many accessories. From headband to a glittering ankle chain, she bought too many items and made Hyunjae had to pay for all that. Her friends were all shocked seeing her friend acted like a bad girl.

After made the payment, Hyunjae smiled at her and whispered, "I'm a bad boy, so I like a bad girl". He winked at her and waved his hand to them before he left. He knew all her friends now sided at him just by looking at how she treated him just now. So, he wasn't entirely lost at the game she prepared. He smiled. He decided to seek revenge which will make her regret treated him like today.

In his mind, 'You'll be mine'.

After a few weeks, he decided to work as a part-timer at the restaurant owned by the girl's parent until he got a full-time job that he applied in many companies previously. He started being close to her father at first. He even called Hyunjae as 'son' due to their match personality. He believed when things go well like this, it's a huge sign that she was her destiny.

Her father knew he's attracted to his daughter but her daughter never responded to him. He allowed Hyunjae to work because he didn't see any harm from him. He also knew this man was actually a good person after talking to him several times. Besides that, his visual and bright personality can help to increase their sales. He wondering if his daughter was a bit weird not attracted to this fine and handsome man.

From that day onwards Hyunjae started to know small details about her every time he came to the restaurant. He started knowing the girl's name is Im Sooyoung. A cheerleader member at her university. She's majoring in journalism and broadcasting. She's a fan of BTS. He found it cute because she looked quite a cold girl to fangirling over idols. He laughed when he imagines her acted like cheerleader every time she meets BTS. Usually, this kind of girl always focus on self-achievement, but BTS growth was more important to her. That probably the reason why she never found him attractive. Her heart already belongs to 7 young men.

Because of that, he studied a lot about BTS. Little by little he managed to talk to her, of course, by using BTS as their most frequent topic. After awhile, Sooyoung started opened up to him as time passed.

"You are my cousin's ex-boyfriend's hyung," Sooyoung stressed on it on their first night getting along with each other in her father's empty restaurant.

Sooyoung surprisingly dislikes her cousin's character because she's a spoiled kid. They're from a richer family and she's from an average poor family. Her family only relied 100% on her father's restaurant.

That night, Sooyoung expressed to Hyunjae a lot of trouble she had and her concerns. Sooyoung was really comfortable telling her stories to Hyunjae. Little that she knows that Hyunjae really likes it when she opened up to him. He looked at her with loving eyes while she telling all her stories to Hyunjae. Hyunjae really loved listening to her stories.

After a while, both of them became closer to each other. Although Hyunjae was the one who keep on chasing her, Sooyoung no longer feels uncomfortable being beside him. Once in a while, Sooyoung made move to him too, especially when she had a hard time and need support. He felt needed by Sooyoung every time she contacted him although most of it happened when she had difficulty. He didn't mind being used. He felt happy instead. He wanted to be someone that she can rely on. He wanted to be the best for her. He had a soft spot in his heart for Sooyoung.

After spending a lot of time together, Hyunjae realised the feeling he had towards Sooyoung was real and deeper than he actually thoughts. Especially when they didn't talk about BTS, but their general interest, Sooyoung was unexpectedly more feminine and similar to him. They shared the same value, mental and emotional wavelength. He realised all this time he keeps on went to a blind date with girls that fit his ideal types. However, none of them that he actually felt similar, familiar and very comfortable as Sooyoung.

He acknowledged now that he fell in love with Sooyoung. Although he always transparent on his feeling towards her and it was pretty obvious he likes her, but he didn't know her actual feeling as she always said she felt like a family. Just an oppa. He got the feeling that Sooyoung like him too. But strangely, there was a distance between both of them. Sometimes they get along very well and everything was sweet, but another time she played push-and-pull with him. All Hyunjae can do now, chasing her like crazy.

MARCH 2020

Recalling sweet memories of Sooyoung made Hyunjae wanted to call Steve. When he about to call Steve, he received a call from an unknown number.

"Hello?" Hyunjae asked.

"Is this Hyunjae?" the girl on the phone asked without greeting him. He didn't recognise the voice.

"Who are you?" Hyunjae replied with a question.

The girl on the phone laughed, "It doesn't matter who I am. I'm warning you, if you mess up with our oppa, I'll make you pay the price".

Hyunjae confused. He asked, "Who's your oppa?"

"All BTS members are my oppa! Stop whatever you are doing to them or else I'll expose your sin!" the girl shouted at Hyunjae. Now he understood what the girl was saying.

Hyunjae smirked and laughed. He couldn't believe how this girl who way younger than him so dare being rude to someone like him. Threatening him is a wrong move. He responded, "Hey lil kid, you better go help your mom or study. Don't waste your time with those oppa who don't even know you. You better don't get involved with adults matter if you don't want to get hurt".

The girl rudely answered, "Hyunjae, you think people don't know who you are? You think people don't know what you are doing? Have you ever think why Big Hit and BTS never take any action towards you yet?".

Hyunjae quiet. He wanted to ignore this girl, but he didn't want to be careless. He knew they tried to contact him and search for him, but never successful. It was actually easy if they quietly contact the investigator or police or even to find him quietly without the media knowledge. Even if Steve covered all his crime through his strong connection and money, someone should already know a lot about him. It's not like Steve the only one with a lot of money in this world. But why he never get caught? What is the reason? And why this girl managed to contact him but not Big Hit?

The girl continued, "Even the sky is watching you. You better make yourself clear and settle this crime quietly with them before the world knew".

"Who are you?" Hyunjae asked again, curious.

The girl replied, "Just a saseang fan?".

The call ended.