I Don't Do Love

"Eat this," he said, sounding as if it was an order.

"Is this even edible?"

Theodore didn't say anything but pointed at the boul, signaling her to finish all the porridge here.

Anna looked at the bowl with utter disgust as she hated eating porridge the most. "Why are you acting like Kiera? Gahh… do you guys have any mom souls inside you or something?"

Theodore was silent, still having a hard time thinking about last night. Why is she so defenseless in front of a grown-up adult like him? Shouldn't she feel a bit wary at least? Or she already forgot about the whole thing that happened last night?

Little did he know Anna was already having a messed up conscience fight inside her mind thinking whether the dream she saw yesterday was actually a dream or a real one. It can't be real, right? Of course not! He would never allow her to kiss him like that even if it was in cheeks only. She should just stop thinking about these unnecessary things.

On the other hand, Theodore also didn't drag the thought out as his mind overcast some other thoughts like her touching other guys' bodies. Shit, this really is bothering him from yesterday.

After falling asleep in his arms yesterday, Theodore carried Anna to her bedroom and placed her on her bed. How come he always ends up carrying her to her bedroom like this? It was good that the guy left knowing his place, actually, he should just give up on something he can't have.

Suddenly, Theodore snapped back to reality when Anna finished all the porridge and put down the bowl with a loud noise expressing her disgust properly. What was he even thinking? Whether that guy is interested in her in that way has nothing to do with him actually. Then why is he so impulsed just by imagining her getting close to any other guy? The whole thing was equally a little hard and confusing to him as well as Anna. Hard to fathom, hard to ignore.

"What is it?" Theodore asked, sensing Anna's questioning gaze all of a sudden.

"Does Kiera know you are here?"

"No."

"Wasn't she home? She didn't come here…," Anna was a bit worried to think maybe Theodore couldn't get hold of Kiera too like her. It was already quite hard to understand why Kiera is acting all weird these days, and now, with that added a new confusion like the reason for Theodore coming back so soon.

"I didn't expect you to be here," Anna said, avoiding eye contact with him while talking. She just couldn't look straight at his eyes as all the dirty thoughts from last night would start to block her mind.

Theodore was a bit irritated by her actions. Does she like to act weird somehow? Without giving any warning, he stood up, walked towards the other side of the table, and yanked her by her hand. This way, she can never avoid eye contact with him, right?

In this position, Anna couldn't really avoid his piercing gaze. This is unfair. She is the one who is supposed to be glaring at him for giving her heart attack first in the morning showing up like that, but how come he is standing here glaring at her as if she did something very wrong.

"Wha…. what are you…"

Theodore touched her smooth hair with his long fingers. She cut her hair short. It's kind of cute though he also liked her long hair too as it was fun to play with them.

"I had my own reasons to come back," Theodore said, still looking straight at her eyes.

"I... see," Anna stammered a bit as she felt a bit overwhelmed by him being this close. Though she tried to release herself from his grasp, he didn't let her go.

"Why are acting so weird, Theodore? I can't understand," this time, Anna looked at his deep black eyes. They weren't exactly on good terms when they departed at that time. Yesterday, she did some crazy things to clear her mind finishing the chapter named Theodore. She thought she could avoid him in the future and treat him just like an acquaintance she knows. She didn't want to get close anymore, getting close made her feel some things that she never felt. The anxiety of not being able to talk to him made her pathetic. And now when she was finally able to assemble her thoughts a bit, he is again here doing some unnecessary things and making her stirred up inside again?

"You are avoiding me?" Theodore said, expressionlessly.

"Oh, can't I?" Suddenly, Anna felt a bit sarcastic. She has the full right to avoid him. She can do whatever she wants, what is it to do with him? But the next moment, his answer made her stuck in awe.

"No, you can't."

Anna couldn't believe her ears. Is this a joke? Does this guy think she would always act all lovestruck by everything he says? Wasn't he a guy until now who doesn't like showing his true colors, who doesn't bother involving people who can bring no benefit to him?

"Why? Do you regret rejecting my offer and want to agree with what I said, huh?"

"Hmm… why not? I kind of like that idea," Theodore said, all of a sudden, taking her into his arms. He was kinda addicted to her body scent. It felt good whenever she was close to him. Right now, he just wants to focus on her, nothing else. Somehow, she was the first person in his life who was able to draw his attention this strongly. He wanted to know about it, kind of obsessed with the idea of knowing her every reaction bit by bit.

At first, Anna was taken aback as her cheeks turned red like tomatoes. Why is this guy so irresistible? She thought she could control herself from drawing herself towards him, but no, she really overestimated herself this time.

"What do you mean by that?"

"I think I am clear enough," Theodore said slowly, without releasing her.

All of a sudden, Anna snapped back to reality. She forcefully pushed Theodore all of a sudden, taking him off-guard.

"Don't joke around like this, Theodore."

"I am not joking."

Anna looked back at him as she wasn't expecting this kind of reply actually. "So, you are gonna finally add me to your adult play, huh? Okay, that's fine with me. But remember, don't dare to fall in love. Actually..., I don't need to care about that too much, right?" she finished just in one breath.

Yes, that expression, that hard expression that she saw that day, it was on his face again. This is the real him, that gentle side just doesn't suit him. That was the kind of look that could make anyone tremble in fear. It was Anna who wasn't a single bit scared. She knew this expression, there was a time she tried to understand the reason behind this expression too. But no more.

"I don't do love, Annabelle," Theodore answered, making his deep voice loud and clear.

"That's fine, Theodore. I don't deserve love either." That's right. A person like her doesn't deserve something like this. She thought she was the one who avoided love, but right at this moment, she realized something. Actually, love never chose to come in her pathway. She never met someone special, someone, who could make her heart beat faster. And after all this time, when she found someone who could give her butterflies is someone off-limits, is someone she has no right to love. This time also, love didn't come, didn't come on her way. She is left alone as usual.

Right now, it's foolish to deny that she likes him. She likes this mysterious person who never opens up with anyone. This overly handsome, overly rude man, whom she somehow came like was the least bit interested in love, was the least bit interested in liking her. Actually, she was lucky enough to stand a chance like this, as she could be beneficial to him right now. After this, there would be no strings attached. After this, she will go back to square one. But somehow, she isn't scared of taking initiative for a single bit.

Anna took some steps forward and returned his gaze. He was quite tall, though Anna was not someone short, it kinda hurts to look at his face when she is a bit closer to him. "It's actually a fair deal, you know. I was really lacking some inspiration for my new novel. Got to understand this romance shit by myself. We better pretend it as a real deal~....."

Saying that Anna didn't give him any chance to talk. She grabbed her mobile phone and hastily left her apartment. Why she is the one always running away? She didn't even bother to see his expression back there.

Was he surprised? Or he just laughed at her foolish act? She didn't want to look all foolish there though. To be honest, she wanted to act cool and casual, she wanted to make him believe that she is not someone who can be swayed by feelings easily. After all, when she got another chance to get to know him better, she just couldn't help it.

Yes, this time, she will try her best to live in the present. If her heart says that it's okay, then it really is okay. Who cares about the consequences later? At least, she doesn't.