Trapped?

The ride was terrible.

Apart from the fact that the green slimy mess that was riding the horses had a smell that you could smell even if you were three miles away, and I'm not meaning that in a positive way, the road hurted. The road was littered with boulders, and laying in a cage while being carried by horses on a road like that: I'm just gonna promise you that it sucks.

I talked with you about the living slime and the horses with giant hear-devices, right? Well, what if I tell you that wasn't the weirdest of all of this?

After about three hours of nearly-dying, we came to the end of the road. It was like a border. At the end of the road, the pine trees that grew on both sides of the path for the entire length of it, stopped along with the bumpy piece of shit. I looked behind and I saw trees as far as my eyes could look, but not one of them grew beyond the border. Then I turned around, to see what was in front of me. And, of course it had to be nothing.

It was a desert. A flat desert, with just sand. Not even any hills or something, I could look everywhere, and with everywhere I could see nothing. Literally, nothing. No wandering desert people on camels or something, or maybe an oasis. Nothing.

I wanted to ask the not inanimate blob that seemed to know what to do, what to do, and as if he heard my thoughts - maybe he did - he turned around and babbled something. 'Hi, English please?', he then shaked his head and gave a swing to the reins, in whose turn the horses flew up in the sky: with their ears.

I now understood the purpose of the ears, but that was literally the only thing I understood of the entire thing that was going on. I started screaming. Maybe, if I knew better, I wouldn't have screamed. I wasn't in pain, and as far as I know now I wasn't in danger either. But in my defense: it is in my nature okay, screaming is more automatic to me than eating, or even breathing. So that was what I did: I screamed. Mister Ugly didn't seem to like it, since he turned around and screamed something back to me (in contrast to me he was actually saying a sentence), but I continued screaming. At some point he seemed to have enough of it, so he looked at what probably was his right arm, which he then slammed me to side of my head with. I can confirm jelly pudding hurts.

I then woke up for the second time that day after being knocked out. This time I wasn't trapped in a cage like before, I was in some sort of medieval tavern. 'Being kidnapped should be more stressful.', I said while shaking the blind spots in my eyes off of me. I heard a frustrated babble being thrown at my head. It sounded somewhat the same as the out of proportions-grown pudding earlier today, but it was a different voice, so I knew something else was speaking to me.