Adalynn

I slipped my sneakers on and waved bye to Mom as I stumbled out the door. My jacket wasn't thick enough to keep a pinching cold whip of wind out and tensing against a cool breeze didn't seem to help. I plugged in my ear buds. Maybe I should have had Mom drive me, it looked like it was about to rain anyways.

No.

No, no, no.

I shook my head and started my walk hoping my music would drown out everything around me. Instead of losing myself and hushing my thoughts, I became almost too aware of my surroundings, and the crushed up crackers in my pocket apparently.

Some birds landed on the fence to my left, a tiny chihuahua racing up to the same fence barking its' head off - big bark with no bite - I watched my old librarian drive passed on my right, and the mailman walking his dog on the opposite side of the street. Small quiet town, with familiar faces that I had seen growing up in this small town.

About two blocks down, I felt the heavyweight in my stomach, like I was being followed, or hunted. I tried to shove the feeling down before I made a quarter turn to watch as a black sedan slowed as it passed. Its' windows too tinted to see inside, but everything in my body said run, or hide. Just get away. Everything seemed to freeze; me, time, the nipping wind.

The sedan pulled off to the side of the road just up ahead. Go. A voice sounded in my head. RUN. I ducked into someone's backyard, hopped their fence, and ended up in someone else's backyard. I did this about two more times before I found myself in an ally behind some houses. Peeking my head through a bush, I watched as the sedan pulled down the road, headed straight for me. I sunk in between the fence and bush, trying to keep myself hidden.

My heart was racing. I didn't know what to do, or how I was going to get to Julie's now. Grabbing my phone I searched for the closest bus stop and when it was arriving. Two minutes, just up and around the corner. I let out a heavy sigh only to suck it back in as the car passed. I half expected it to stop and haul back to find me. But no such thing came.

I jumped up and booked it for the bus stop. My legs wouldn't let me stop, I was too terrified of being followed any longer, or even grabbed. The bus pulled up just as I got to the post. As soon as my body come through those bus doors a wave of relief washed over me.

I arrived at Julies' building twenty minutes early, which was something that had never happened. I strolled in the open door to find a humanly-vacant room. She must've been on lunch. I decided to plop down and take a breather, this was my safe place, where I knew nothing would hurt me.

About five minutes went by before Julie returned with a mug in hand. Her hickory-colored hair was pulled into a pretty bun, with a few fly-aways. She had a pair of reading glasses propped on her head. As she walked in her imperial blue eyes caught sight of me as she sipped at the steaming liquid. Looking up from her cup, she nearly spit it out as she entered the room.

"Adalynn, what're you doing here so early honey?" That tone just set everything in and my eyes blurred as heat pierced through my sockets. I took in a deep breath trying to swallow the tightness in my throat, and the crack in my voice.

"I woke up early this morning and Blue was there. I laid on his lap to fall asleep, then dad left or well mom kicked him out, Mom is trying to mend our broken relationship so I decided to walk here today. I was followed for at least a block by this small black sedan and I had to hide for it to lose me and I finally ended up on the bus and now I'm here."

Everything came crashing down, I was so scatter-brained. I didn't know what to do, how to help myself or fix my problem. I couldn't figure out how or where I belonged. Julie sort of stood there for a minute while I just cried, giving me a moment before she dove in and wrapped her arms around me. A healing warmth overwhelmed me and soon it was as if she scooped the hole of emotion in my chest clean. She held on for a minute longer before stepping back and giving me one good long look, holding my shoulders in her hands.

"Any better?" She asked. I blew out a breath.

"Yes."

"Okay, first let's talk about Blue."

She sat down and we started the session early. We ended up talking for about two hours because she was free. Eventually, in our conversation, she had asked about the car that followed me. I had explained the tinted windows, how it felt like I was being watched for a good five minutes before I noticed the car. Then it had pulled off to the side of the road and a voice inside me had said run. It wasn't my gut or anything but something stronger.

She sat back in her chair and her eyes shifted. The weight of her gaze was a lot heavier all of a sudden. Like lenses were pulled from the aim of her site. She fiddled with her fingers as I continued through her shift. I only spoke for a minute longer before I collapsed on the chair with a heavy sigh, trying to feel that relief being lifted again. Instead, the weight fell on to my chest. As if I knew something was wrong but I didn't understand what was so wrong about it.

"Are you feeling better?" She asked.

"A little. The weight of these problems just kinda shifted onto my chest but I'll be okay." She stood from her chair and paced over to me on the outstretched plush lounge chair. She gave my arm a good brush before plopping down on the edge where she could find enough space.

"That weight will slowly dissipate but for now, I do have another client at three coming in, and it's nearing two-thirty. Shall I call your mom?"

I hesitated before giving a nod. She gave an approving nod and reached for her cell. I watched her dial her number, and for a moment I was half tempted to reject her offer and take the bus again. But if my life was in danger there was no reason to fight.

"Alright kiddo, Mom will be here in about twenty minutes. The question is who is going to tell her about the car?" She gave me a pitied look. That was her way of telling me I needed to.

"I will." I gave her a smirk.

"Alright. I'm gonna go grab a snack and a drink, did you want anything?" I shook my head. "Okay, if I don't see you in twenty minutes, I hope you have a good day kiddo. Remember, I'm-"

"Always a call away." I finished.

She gave me a smile before rounding out the door.

I could only hope Mom wasn't going to ask why she was called to pick me up.

I knew damn well she was going to.

"Hey, sweetie." She smiled as I crawled in her Hyundai.

"Hey, Mom."

"What happened to taking the bus?"

"Just didn't want to walk this time?" She leaned her head towards me, she knew that wasn't the answer.

"So it wasn't the black sedan?" Damn, Julie knows me like the back of her hand.

"That's a part of it." She plopped back in her seat.

"Were you just not going to tell me?" I shrugged. "Adalynn."

I turned to face her. To catch the concern and worry pinched between her dark brows, the messy waves of her dark blonde hair, the deepening lines around her eyes and lips. Her deep grey eyes twinkled with questions, with distress locked behind each iris. I was ready to cry again. I hated being confronted on things like this, where I felt wrong for not wanting to tell my mom something. She scanned over my face for a sign of effort in this conversation but she found nothing and pulled the car to a start. The ride home was silent. And the next two days weren't any different.

Soon enough Monday rolled around and I was going back to Julies. Mom had talked me into her driving me. She wasn't letting me go alone again.

This time, Julies' door was closed. Which was odd. Every time she had a scheduled client she left the door open at least ten minutes prior. I took my time walking up to her door but knocked loud enough to intrude the chatter on the other side. A man in a black suit opened the door, nodded at me, and passed so quickly I couldn't catch a glimpse of his face.

I entered the room and it felt as if I was walking into a death trap. I turned and there sat a man. Not Julie. But a creepy, slender man. He was flipping through papers before he was free enough to look up and notice me standing in confusion.

"Oh hello! You must be Adalynn." He stood and outstretched his arm. "I'm Doctor Bates. I'm stepping in for Julie right now, she had a family emergency and had to leave the state this morning."

I didn't move. Julie left without calling? He held his hand out for a minute longer before washing the smile from his face and lowering his hands to wipe them on his slacks.

"Well, take a seat. Let's talk?" He stepped aside the desk and lowered a hand towards the seat.

Leave. That voice echoed in my body. It shook the deep part of my core. Get. Out.

I scooted towards the seat, and slowly sat down.

"Well Adalynn, tell me a bit about yourself." He sat down and intertwined his fingers, sitting back all creepy like.

I felt him studying me like I was a tiger getting ready to pounce. My every movement felt forced so I could look or even feel normal.

"I'm really sorry. I really don't know how I would describe myself to someone." I turned to avoid eye contact, so I surveyed the way my shoes had fit over my feet.

"Well, no worries. I don't blame you. I would be just as uncomfortable talking to someone about heavy stuff that I've never met before too." He sat forward, resting his elbows on his knees. I looked up to meet icy grey eyes that dug into my soul as if peeling the words from the pages of a book. He was trying to read me, sorry pal, my walls are too thick for that. I was starting to get defensive. Julie would never act like this. She would never pry.

"Well!" He clapped his hands, my body tensed in a startled response. "Let's get down to business." He scooped up several folders before sifting through them to find his desired file. Opening the flaps flat on the desktop to reveal countless papers, he began reading from the top sheet.

Adalynn Renee Lufter, my named spelled in soft cursive on the top of the page.

"Looks like Julie was going to talk to you about a camp, where you're surrounded by people who are going through some similar things that you are. Where everyone can help and provide advice. How does that sound?"

He gave a chipper smile.

I nodded, hesitantly.

"Okay, well there will be a bus to pick you up Wednesday morning, at the old library. How does that sound?"

No. The voice echoed in my bones, making my jaw tense with hesitation.

I nodded. Why would I say yes!?

"Alright then! Wednesday morning, 10 AM, at the old library."

He stood and outstretched his hand for yet another hand shake. I stared at his hand for a moment before he pulled away and pressed his hands to his slacks again as if he were wiping the clammy sweat off his hands.

"Okay, well this is the end of our session. You're free to go." He spoke sourly, then turned to file my papers away. I quickly gathered my things and hopped on the quickest bus home.

Why wouldn't Julie tell me she was leaving?

What would Mom think?

Was I really going to go?

I was sinking into my own thoughts, almost missing my stop. I jumped up and plunged into the cold. With the freezing bursts of wind that whipped my hair around. I realized my Jacket was still sitting in the seat. Damn it. Today just wasn't going to get any better. A little less than half a block from the house, droplets of water began to come down. Racing to hide from the quickening rain, I shortly found the front door was locked.

Mom never locked the door around this time, she knew I would be coming home - which also meant I never kept a key on me.

I banged, rattled, and yelled at the door before my impatience overcame me. I retreated to the back of the house, where, fortunately, the back door was unlocked. I dipped into the mud room and kicked off my shoes.

"Mom?" Silence.

I darted upstairs to find the house vacant of all forms of life, but I spotted a little note that sat just above the doorknob on my door.

Be at the store when you come back - Mom

Great. I crawled into bed, cuddling under the sheets. My head ached as my brain was slowing down from running a million miles a minute. But as soon as my head hit the pillow, I was out like a light.