EPISODE 14: Lies*
I drift into consciousness. And then back out. The world is a blur, and random images seem to float aimlessly around in the pool of my thoughts, as though they are being blown about viciously by a hurricane.
A tap on my shoulder momentarily brings me back to the outside world, but after a second I am once again lost. I could feel somebody trying to look at me, staring in the eye, but I couldn't keep focus. The whole world simply feels low resolution, a bad quality movie. Confusion blossoms in my heart and I know that sooner or later I would need to wake up to stare reality in the face. But for now, I lay down my heavy head, and retreat into wallowing blackness.
"Luna... Luna, what happened?" Athena whispers soothingly unto my ears. She is sitting on the edge of my bed, comforting my languor. Lily and Ralts also glance at me with worried and nervous bodies. I feel like I'm in a death bed, with the grim standing behind my back.
Without weary eyes, I give my mother a nice smile. Consciousness clings tightly to my feeble self, ever gaining power and energy.
"You know what? I should be mad right now, but you keep on making me worried. What if something goes wrong? What if you get kidnapped or what if someone hurt you? That's why I told you to stay in the orphanage. You always listened to me, but what happened? Why did it suddenly change when Jenny and her Pikachu arrived?" My mother spews dozens of questions on my face with an inclined tone. I respond with laughter while looking at my mother's worried face. Still, my mind is crowded with what I've experienced earlier.
Suspicious, yes, suspicious indeed. Why would Team Rocket do such a thing? All my life I thought to myself, "Team Rocket is a bunch of measly burglars" but never did I notice that they had a soft side, not to mention what happened in the orphanage.
Maybe, there are really good and bad grunts, but what struck me the most is when Team Rocket told me that they could heal my disorder. It worked on the boy, could it work on me as well? Never mind, I think it's best if I forget their offer, joining them would probably be a waste of time.
"Don't give me that look! I scolded Jenny for dragging you into this kind of mess, don't make me scold you too." Athena's voice inclines gradually. I don't know if she's either mad or worried about me. I respond with an emotionless face while cuddling Ralts and Petilil on my hand.
"Hey, are you listening to me, Luna?! I don't want to do this, but I have to scold you." Mother's voice reaches the pinnacle. Her voice is so intense, that it even causes my body to shiver while hugging Petilil and Ralts.
"I'm having a hard time to communicate with you, please don't let me scold you again. I'm trying my best to treat you the way no one has treated you before. I'm doing everything I can to take care of you, since the day you were given to me." From the pinnacle to the denouement, mother's voice slowly cools. Aside from her voice, something caught my attention, a phrase which slip out of mother's mouth.
"G... Given?" I question with suspicion. What did she mean by given? I start to sense a feeling, I couldn't explain what it was, truth? or perhaps ideal? Or maybe a bit of both? My feelings are all mixed up after my mother probably said a phrase she wasn't supposed to say.
"Gcck!" My mother's voice stutters. Her face turns paler while regretting her words. So it's true then, I wasn't born, I was given. My mother's looks tells me everything, now she can't deny it. I don't know whether to become angry or melancholy, my mind is filled with jumbled emotions.
"I, I was given?!" My voice stutters with visible anger to my mother. A secret long gone, now revived by a sudden blooper. My mother tries to deny things, but her anxious face tells me she's lying. Multiple excuses, my mother made but I cease to believe a single one.
"Tell me th... the truth!" I demand with a pinnacle voice. It rains in my pupils, and the water drools out the slopes of my face. I clench my two fists with anger while Lily and Ralts try to comfort me. For a moment, my mother remains silent. Magnus's words rush back to her, she could've told me sooner
.
"You're right, you were given to me." Athena's voice utters steadily, just like a stream flowing with tranquility. Although that tranquility gradually turned into regret and remorse as the clock ticks by.
"You're not my mother, aren't you?" I question solemnly. My tears continue to stream, trying to doubt everything my mother uttered. Truth is treason in an empire of lies. Only by looking at an object from many perspectives do you see its exact shape and dimensions, and truth is the same; For it is the harmonizing of these facts from apparently unrelated thoughts that lead to the eureka moment, the finding of truth. For me? Eureka won't be the word, probably doubt? Or remorse, with a regret of knowing the truth.
"When you were born, your real father and mother gave me to you. They didn't want a child with burdens to bear, so they gave their duty to me. I enraged at your former parents for treating you like a scapegoat, and that's when, um... I became your mother. I decided to take care of you up to this day because I believe that children like you deserve a place in this massive world. You don't have a father, and he never died from a car accident." My mother reveals with eyes slowly twitching with bubbles and flowing tears. Another game-changer occurs on this early night for even my parents hated me for who I am.
With rage and resentment, I ignore my mother and covered my body with my blanket. Inside, my heart is shattered into pieces, after knowing how much my real parents hate me. As I blink, sorrows drips from my eyelids and slid down my cheeks. I bite my lips tightly in an attempt to hide any sound that wanted to escape from my mouth; my heart sank
.
"Luna, I know it's hard to accept the harsh truth about your real parents, but at least I treat you like one. Don't bother the past, for I am your parent and not them." My mother suites by rubbing the blanket I am hiding on. I exert an immense amount of energy on my arms and clinging to my bedsheet. A gradient has formed, a mixture of grief and anger.
I'm not mad towards my mother, I even thank her for accepting me into her loving arms. Still, knowing that someone would treat you as trash just because you bear a burden isn't reasonable. If only I didn't have a stuttering voice, if only I didn't have dysphemia, who knows? I would probably be in a bungalow, with my real parents, we would probably cherish each other, and what could be better than gazing upon the night stars?