Arena Forty-Three: Their Secrets III

After planting the seed of worry inside my mind, Anastasia explained some common etiquette of the court. Even though she had said that it didn't matter, she still insisted that knowing a bit is better than knowing absolutely nothing.

I agreed, and we passed an hour or so learning the basic gestures. I had to say it, nobles really lived a stuck-up life.

As I thought such things, Anastasia continued to teach me ways to hold the fork, the best way to kneel in front of the emperor and so on... And she look extremely beautiful while doing so.

I followed her instructions while being enthralled by her beauty... It was as if the face which was full of hatred just a day before was a myth.

Remembering that duel, I decided to ask Anastasia the question I had in my mind.

"Anastasia... You held back, didn't you?"

"What do you mean?"

She asked, leaning forward and turning her head towards me. Her long flaxen hair fell down, looking a bit disheveled. Yet that chaotic state also looked extremely precious...

I had fallen for her even without knowing it... Hadn't I... ?

Cursing myself for being so easy, I pressed on the previous topic.

"I meant in the duel. You held back against Catherine, didn't you?"

"... What makes you say that?"

She asked while sporting a playful smile on her face. Sighing, I explained.

"There's no way I could have stopped the strongest Elliots with just an exo-skeleton. I would have been crushed to pieces if you two were serious."

"Hmm... As always, you're observant."

Anastasia smiled and stood up. She turned and looked at me over her shoulder.

"It wasn't that I was holding back. It was more like I couldn't use more powers."

"Why... Couldn't you use more power?"

"Because if I had done that, Helios would have burned me to death."

I was speechless at her words. Then, slowly, I asked.

"You mean that... If you use your full powers, you'll get burned alive?"

Hearing my grim voice, Anastasia shook her head.

"It depends on my emotions. The more enraged I am, the more it will burn me. Around 30% of the damages I get in the arena battles are from my own Regalia, you see."

"... But you were extremely enraged back then, weren't you?"

I asked. It wasn't like her. The Anastasia I had met in the beginning took actions on the spur of a moment. If she acted the same way as before, she would have burned to death, or her mind would have, just like she said.

Yet, she held back.

"It isn't like you... To hold back."

I muttered, looking at her back.

She giggled hearing my comment, before muttering.

"I'm scared, Arnold."

Even though her voice was barely audible, it clearly reached me.

"... Scared? Of what?"

"Of death. Of losing myself. Of... Being destroyed."

"..."

Once again, I couldn't say anything. I could see her shoulders trembling, but I couldn't stand up and hug her.

Her words just felt too confusing to me. I didn't think Anastasia would fear her death. I didn't want her to die, of course, but I didn't think she had such fears.

I wanted to console her, but I didn't know what to say. I couldn't say "Then leave the Stigma". I couldn't just say "I'll protect you". I couldn't say " Everything will be fine". Because even I knew, those were just empty words.

As if understanding my inner turmoil, Anastasia turned back towards me and smiled.

"It's fine, Arnold. You don't have to console me."

"I..."

But not letting me finish my sentence, she changed the topic.

"Anyhow, due to the risk, I was forbidden to use the Overdrive mode. And about Catherine's Regalia, Ymir... Well, she wasn't trying to hold back either. It was just that Ymir had acknowledged Helios as an ally in too many battles, so it couldn't immediately accept it as an enemy... Which led to its low attack power. So... Yeah. We weren't holding back... We were forced to hold back."

Explaining that, Anastasia turned towards the exit of the area. I just stared at her, still trying to find something to say.

But before I could say anything, she smiled and waved her hand.

"Well... I can see that you're conflicted... So let's meet some other day, okay?"

And with that, she left. I just stared at her retreating back, sitting there in silence.

I had never felt so pathetic in my whole life.

...

A week had passed by since then before I even knew it. The classes had become more complex, and the homework was too big... It made me almost forget the turmoil I had gone through just a week before.

I didn't, or couldn't meet Roxy or Anastasia due to the pressure. Well, I knew that was just a lie. In reality, I felt awkward to meet either of them, especially Anastasia.

But, now, I had one extra thing to worry about.

[You are required to visit the Imperial Castle tomorrow, 6:00 P.M. You'll probably get a royal letter once you go back to your dormitory, but just wanted to give you a heads up.]

Grey's message made me frown. I sighed before looking ahead of me. The classes had ended for the day, and I had been walking back to the dormitory when the message reached me.

I was half-expecting for the matter to be dropped... But oh well.

It seemed that the ceremony was inevitable.

Sighing for the second time, I walked through the densely packed trees towards the dormitory building... I had much preparing to do.

...

The next day, I woke up at 5:00 A.M. and washed myself up. While the ceremony was more than 12 hours away, I still had to prepare a suitable dress and prepare for the mental battle that lied ahead.

I walked out of the room in my casual clothes and saw Raymond putting down a plate of toast on the table. He had been informed of my plans by Grey, and he had also prepared a suitable tailor for me.

I couldn't help but be grateful to him for all he had done.

While I thought that, Raymond noticed me and waved his hand. I picked up my pace and approached him in front of the table.

"You're awake already? You could have slept a bit more."

He said in a gentle tone while he gestured me to have a seat.

"Haha, you say that, but you already prepared my breakfast for me."

I chuckled as I sat down. Raymond shrugged and walked back to the kitchen.

"I mean, I knew how nervous you were the previous week... So I assumed that you'll get the minimum hours of sleep and wake up early."

He said from the kitchen. I nodded, understanding his reasoning.

He quickly brought out an omelette along with some other light but fulfilling side dishes. I quickly ate up while cherishing his cooking.

If not for his unusual powers, he would have made the perfect house husband... But well, he was already engaged so he probably was one... Wait.

Wasn't Felicia affected by his ability?

"Uh, Raymond... If you don't mind, can I ask you something?"

Raymond, who had sat down beside me while holding his tablet to read the news, turned towards me and tilted his head.

"Hm? Go ahead."

"Isn't Felicia... affected by your... uh, ability?"

"Ah... You mean this?"

Raymond asked while he tapped his mask. I nodded, and he laughed while he explained.

"It's fine. My ability doesn't affect the Imperial Family."

"... Is it the same for the others?"

I asked, narrowing my eyes.

"By others, if you mean Jeffery and Roxy... Well, yes. If not, the Valentina Family would have taken over the empire by now, right?"

"... I guess I can't deny that."

It was probably better that way. I couldn't bear the thought of Jeffery running the empire... It would be much worse than it already was.

"But you don't need to worry about that for now. Just focus on the ceremony. Depending on how it goes, you might hit a jackpot, or you might lose everything."

Raymond spoke in a grim voice while looking at me. I gulped the food down and nodded.

"I know, Anastasia, Felicia and Grey already told me."

"Even Felicia... Hm. I guess that's just like her."

Raymond chuckled, as if remembering something fond. I smiled seeing that before standing up.

I had already finished my food, so it was time for me to leave for the tailor.

"I'll leave now."

"Do you remember your schedule?"

Raymond asked as he escorted me to the door.

"I do... First the tailor, then I'll visit the trainer you mentioned to learn some more basic etiquette at 10 A.M. Then I'll go pick up the dress at noon, and go to the second trainer at 1 P.M. to learn about the major nobles and their families. At 3 P.M., I'll have lunch at the restaurant before waiting for the car to pick me up in the area. Then I'll go to the Imperial Castle with the escorts and attend the party early."

I parroted my schedule while pointing at the places such as the tailor, the trainers' places, the restaurant etc on the map hovering in front of me.

While Raymond couldn't see the map, he still understood that I knew the schedule, so he opened the door without any more words.

"Well then, I'm off."

I bid him farewell and left the dormitory. Hearing the quiet "Good Luck" from behind, I hastened.

The sun had barely come out, but the day had already started. And today was going to be a long one.