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Fishing the Myriad Heavens

Tired of the schemes and strifes of city life, Bei Feng finally returned to his hometown in the countryside. While picking asters 'neath the Eastern fence; My gaze upon the Southern mountain rests; Rearing a few chickens and ducks, I shall lead a simple and leisurely life! However, who would have thought that fate would play a huge joke on Bei Feng? All kinds of magical items and beings of the Myriad Worlds could actually be fished out of the Ancient Well in his yard! Even a chicken reeled out of the well ended up chasing Bei Feng all over the yard and beating him black and blue... speechless and aggrieved, he asked the Heavens: if, that day, I’d fished out a dragon instead of a chicken, what would’ve happened to me?!

Dao Is Unfathomable · Thành thị
Không đủ số lượng người đọc
641 Chs

The First Catch!

Biên tập viên: Kurisu

Whilst bathed in the gentle glow of the moonlight, a man and a chicken solemnly stared at each other. Bei Feng looked in shock at the Giant Cock he’d just reeled in, a blank look on his face.

Bei Feng never could have imagined that, one day, he would end up fishing a giant chicken out of an ancient well.

In return, the Giant Cock also never imagined that there would come a day when it would be fished out of an ancient well, let alone with such rapid speed.

‘Such a huge chicken! How long will it take me to eat it? Oh, it looks quite tasty, and it’ll likely be enough for me to eat for a long time!’ Breaking out of his trance, Bei Feng inspected the chicken, an evil gleam flashing within his pupils.

"Mm, that’s right, I’ll need to remove the hook first."

Bei Feng forced the cock’s beak open and began grasping for the hook. As for the giant chicken, it was fantasizing about how it would peck this despicable human to death once it regained its ability to move. After fumbling around for a long time, Bei Feng finally managed to remove the hook.

"CLUCK!!!"

As soon as the hook was removed, the Giant Cock realized that whatever it was that had bound its movements was gone. Jumping energetically, it flipped over onto its feet and squawked angrily.

‘Ah! It became so lively the moment the hook was removed?!’ Bei Feng felt a chill at the back of his neck. He swallowed a mouthful of saliva and backed up hurriedly. The silly-looking Giant Cock had already spread its multi-colored wings and was now angrily charging toward him.

"CLUCK CLUCK!"

The Giant Cock flapped its wings furiously, dramatically increasing its speed . The dust on the ground was immediately stirred up, covering a big area.

"Oh sh*t!"

Watching a forty, fifty-catty cock half his height charging toward him, Bei Feng’s face immediately became pale. Turning around, he started to flee at his top speed!

Being chased at and pecked by even a regular farm rooster was a painful and scary enough matter. Receiving a peck from a gigantic cock like this, especially one with a beak not inferior to that of an eagle’s, was definitely no joke! He would likely lose a piece of flesh for every peck he received!

"F*ck! Such great strength!"

At that moment, Bei Feng, who was busy daydreaming, received a powerful flying kick on his back from the Giant Cock’s claws, causing him to stagger forward uncontrollably.

A stinging, painful sensation spread out from his back. It felt as though someone had hit him across his back with a wooden plank. Bei Feng did not need to look at his back to know that it was bleeding right now.

"Cluck, Cluuuck!"

The Giant Cock called out in a high-pitched voice. In Bei Feng’s ears, its clucking was brimming with mockery! He could distinctly hear a sliver of arrogance in it, as well!

‘Hmph! I can’t believe that I have fallen so low that I’m being bullied by a chicken!’

Forgetting his initial fear, Bei Feng began to lose his temper instead. Turning around, he ran directly toward the kitchen.

The over-one-meter-tall giant chicken chased the fully grown man across the yard furiously, crowing and clucking loudly as it followed closely behind him. The entire scene looked extremely ridiculous.

"Where is it?!" Bei Feng searched the kitchen frantically as he mumbled to himself.

"Cluck!"

At this point, the Giant Cock was pacing about outside of the kitchen, waiting for Bei Feng to show himself. It was not hurried at all, perhaps convinced that this despicable human wouldn’t be able to escape. Slowing down its pace, it calmly proceeded towards the interior of the kitchen.

As the saying went, chickens are in high spirits when involved in happy events [1]. The more it thought about revenge, the happier it became. Clasping its two wings behind its back and puffing out its chest, it assumed a cool, dignified expression as it waddled into the kitchen, appearing as if it had come to inspect its own territory.

‘Found it!’ Bei Feng held a chopper behind his back and narrowed his eyes as he looked at the Giant Cock who was now sauntering over toward him.

"Cluck CLUCK!"

Having finally cornered Bei Feng, the chicken decided to end this despicable human in one blow. It came closer, aimed its beak toward Bei Feng and heavily kicked off the ground. Flapping both of its wings strongly, it propelled itself forward with an even greater momentum. The chicken shot across the kitchen floor like a rocket, its beak pointed straight at Bei Feng’s forehead!

"DIE!"

Bei Feng did not attempt to dodge the attack. Raising the over-30-centimeter-long chopper, he hacked violently at the Giant Cock!

This chopper was actually different from those purchased at random marketplaces. This chopper was created by the village’s blacksmith using the materials he himself supplied! It had a wider back and weighed much more than any ordinary chopper!

Although it hadn't been used for years, it still retained its sharpness. The only pity was that rust was beginning to cover the blade.

"Puchi!"

The blade drew a line across the Giant Cock’s neck. Following that, a spurt of hot blood splashed onto Bei Feng, covering his face.

The Giant Cock fell to the ground, flailing feebly about. However, its struggles were in vain. How could it be possible for it live after having its throat cut open?

Chicken feathers and blood flew all over the kitchen, and the Giant Cock eventually stopped struggling after a while. Only its legs continued to twitch for a brief period of time.

"Che, no matter how formidable you are, didn’t you end up as my dinner in the end?"

Only now did Bei Feng approach the Giant Cock, looking at it in disdain. He seemed to have already forgotten that he had just been chased all over his yard a short moment ago by the very same chicken he was now looking down upon...

‘Looks like I need to be more careful from now on when I’m fishing from the well. For a mere chicken to be enough to make me end up in such a miserable state... if anything stronger were to appear, I might be unable to handle it," Bei Feng touched the bloody wound on his back and thought silently.

Having made up his mind, he walked out of the kitchen and drew a bucket of water from the well. He produced a large pot, scrubbed it clean and started boiling some water in it.

Whilst waiting for the water to heat, Bei Feng began to clean the furniture and other things in his room using a wet cloth. By the time he had more or less tidied up his room, the water in the pot was already boiling.

Bei Feng directly tossed the entire chicken into the boiling water. This pot was amongst the biggest ones used to cook in the countryside, being big enough to cook for a big group of people. To be exact, it was slightly bigger than a wash basin… despite that, Bei Feng was only barely able to fit the entire chicken in the pot.

After boiling it for a few minutes, Bei Feng began to remove the feathers. Having been soaked in the hot water, the chicken’s feathers came off very easily as whole handfuls of feathers could be pulled out with his every move.

In roughly 30 minutes, the Giant Cock was plucked bare. Bei Feng conveniently kept a tuft of feathers to craft a handheld fan for himself in the future.

Following that, he picked up a kitchen knife and sliced open the stomach of the chicken to remove its intestines, throwing them away immediately. Bei Feng never liked eating such things. The main problem with them was that the internal organs of fowls were especially difficult to clean. Even if cleaned properly, it was still impossible to get rid of their stale taste.

After getting rid of the internal organs, Bei Feng chopped the chicken up into parts and, using a handful of hay, he proceeded to burn the fine hair off the chicken’s skin while in the kitchen.

Normally, the entire chicken should be hung upside down and roasted over a fire to get rid of all the fine hair. However, this chicken was too d*mn big. Thus, Bei Feng could only use this method instead.

Soon, the meat was prepared. Bei Feng went on to fry some vegetables and prepare some side dishes.

Children from poor families often learned household chores and other essential skills such as cooking very early on in life. Making a few dishes like this wasn’t too difficult for Bei Feng. Adding the ingredients and seasonings he had bought earlier, an appetizing bowl of roasted chicken with carrots soon emerged from his wok.

Adding on a bowl of piping hot white rice, to Bei Feng, in his exhaustion, this meal was akin to a godsend, a blessing from the Heavens themselves.

"Ee? This is too freaking good!" Bei Feng picked up a piece of chicken with his chopsticks and, full of anticipation, put it into his mouth. The instant the meat entered his mouth, it immediately melted and an indescribable flavor exploded on top of his tongue!

Usually, animals bigger than others of the same species tended to be older, while their meat not as tender. Initially, Bei Feng too made the same assumption. However, the meat turned out to be incredibly tender, succulent and bursting with flavorful juices, leaving a delightful, long lasting taste which lingered in his mouth!

Without further ado, he picked up another piece of chicken and stuffed it into his mouth. Chomping on the chicken meat piece after piece with great gusto, Bei Feng resembled a hungry ghost freshly released from hell.

"Eh? Finished?"

Bei Feng searched the dish thoroughly with his chopsticks. Unfortunately, other than carrots, the only other thing left in the dish was…. another bunch of carrots.

Bei Feng rubbed his bloated stomach and thought to himself that he could probably still eat another bowl!

After further consideration, however, he decided to stop for now. The chicken meat wouldn’t run away in the middle of the night. He could always eat more on the next day.

He also decided to buy a small fridge as soon as possible. Otherwise, the meat would go bad very quickly considering the current weather.

Quickly putting the dirty dishes away, Bei Feng approached the well again. He drew a bucket of water and began bathing under the moonlight.

The water from the well was cool throughout the whole year. Even though it was currently summer and the temperature remained high even during the night, the water was still rather cold and refreshing.

Finished with his bath, Bei Feng returned to his room. Other than preparing a clean bed sheet and a blanket, the most important thing to do before going to sleep was to light a mosquito coil.

This was, after all, the foot of a mountain. The moment the night fell, scores of mosquitoes could be heard, buzzing incessantly. If he didn’t light any mosquito incense, he would wake up the next morning only to find himself covered with red dots from head to toe, with the dots being the bites inflicted upon him by mosquito battalions during the night!

Perhaps due to having busied himself for an entire day, Bei Feng’s body was completely exhausted. He fell into a deep sleep almost the very instant his head touched his pillow.

That night, Bei Feng dreamt of many things and many people.

He dreamt that he had found his parents and was in the middle of asking them why they had abandoned him. Just as he was about to hear their answer however, he entered another dream. This time, he went back to the time several years ago, when he fell from the work site.

[1] ED/N: A wordplay on an idiom (a ‘human’ replaced with a ‘chicken’). The meaning is pretty literal.