3

Blink. Blink.

Blinking a few times, he slowly saw a white ceiling, he turned his head to the left who also saw white with some decorations on the wall— he turned his head to the right, wincing because his head suddenly hurt.

"Ezra!"

An urgent voice called his name, but Ezra's vision was still a little blurry. A man filled his eyes more and more, a familiar face with pale blue eyes staring straight into his face.

Ezra's eyes immediately widened.

Huh, that's Raphael.

"?????"

Still confused, Raphael returned to sit beside him with Ezra still lying on the bed with an astonished face. If he took a closer look, this place was s a bit familiar, it was a hospital room.

Was he safe?

No way. He was dead, his body was lying lifeless on the ground, was this an illusion again? Like a flashback when he was still alive? but why did everything feel real.

Thump. He could feel his heart pounding, the place that had been empty before, the place that did not make any sound— pounding to live again, Ezra held his chest, and sure enough he could feel the sound of a regular heartbeat through his palms.

"Would you like something to drink?" Raphael asked, without hearing an answer from him, he had prepared a glass filled with water, then offered it to Ezra with a faint smile, though concern was still evident on his face.

Ezra was even more confused, he tilted his head, scanning at Raphael's figure, whose hair somehow looked longer than the last time he saw him.

He slowly straightened up his body to sit up, "Ah." Wincing because he felt his head hurt. Raphael seeing Ezra who was in pain, put the glass down on the small table beside the bed, helping Ezra to sit up.

"Damn I should have killed that guy, tsk."

Raphael clicked his tongue, the wrinkles on his forehead looked terrifying, he stared at Ezra's body with anger, but that anger was not mean for him.

Ezra blinked again, for some reason this conversation was very familiar, this room was also familiar, he felt like he was having a deja vu.

"Does your head still hurt, don't worry I'll beat that guy up again."

Well, this was a conversation he really, certainly remembered, Raphael's words reminded him of the old time when he passed the basketball court behind the campus, and that day might have been his unlucky day, the basketball hit his head hard, causing Ezra to faint on the spot.

Ezra slowly held his head, —if I'm not mistaken the right head— his hand froze when he felt the bandage, his guess was right.

"....."

Unknowingly Ezra's hand quickly grabbed Raphael's hand who was about to take a glass of water, seeing Ezra who suddenly grabbed his wrist, Raphael made an astonished face.

I can touch him.

Ezra stared at the hand that was holding Raphael's wrist, trying to strengthen and weaken the grip on the hand that was bigger than him, his eyes blinked again as if he could not believe it.

"Ezra?"

Shit, he did something weird, but Ezra still could not process what was going on.

"This is the first time you're holding my hand like this, haha." Raphael laughed, Ezra immediately let go of his hand. The smile on Raphael's lips grew even warmer. As if he did not want to let go. Now, it was Raphael who reached for his hand, wanting to be the one holding it. Ezra flinched slightly, his grip simultaneously firm and gentle.

"I'm glad you are okay."

Yes, this conversation was the same as in the old days, but somehow the tone of his voice had changed.

What was Ezra doing at that time?

He recalled what had happened— a basketball hit his head, he passed out, being in the hospital room with his head covered in bandages, Raphael sitting beside him with a worried face, saying all that, then what did Ezra say at that moment?

'Go away, it's noisy, you're making my head hurt.'

"....."

He said that to Raphael, who also replied, 'I'm glad you're okay.' There was a sad and disappointed tone in his voice.

He had no idea why he said that in the first place, maybe because he was too depressed that he ignored the people who truly cared for him, lost in thoughts that he was worthless and did not deserve to continue surviving. So any kindness anyone gave him felt like an insult.

"Raphael…"

At his name being called, Raphael's face brightened even more, "Hmm?"

"What year is it now?"

"Aha, did that bump on your head make you forget, 2025."

Ah. So he was back in 2025, two years ago. When he was still in college.

--Can this happen? Isn't this an illusion like what happened before?

Whatever it was, he did not understand what was going on right now, should he use this chance to change something in his previous life? Could this be part of his after-death illusion, perhaps he would suddenly lose consciousness again, returning to the place filled with white fog.

Ezra sighed, the beating heart in his chest was real, he could touch Raphael, so this most likely was not an illusion.

'You should live happily. Instead of being here, you're still very young. There are still many things waiting for you in life.'

'Someone is waiting for you.'

The words from his grandmother immediately resonated in his mind, Ezra chuckled, did he deserve to live again? Given a second chance like this— most likely his life would continue and end with the same result, Ezra was still someone who had a mental illness, even if he was given several chances like this, he would just go through the same cycle of life. This was probably one of the torments from god for him after death.

"Drink it." Raphael brought the glass of water closer to his face, he did not give it to him because his other hand was still holding Ezra's right hand, raising his eyebrows, he looked at the glass in surprise.

The glass was getting closer to his lips, sighing, Ezra opened his mouth, decided to accept Raphael's help, drank the water until it was almost empty, his throat which had felt dry got better.

The smile on Raphael's lips grew wider, even his eyes were smiling.

Ezra did not know why the man looked happy when he was sick with aching head at the moment. Seeing Ezra's astonished face, Raphael erased his smile, returned to his usual calm expression, "Rest well," he said, but Ezra looked back at his hand which was still being held by Raphael.

I can touch him.

That was what he thought. Ezra slowly let go of his hand. Raphael, as if regretting that it had happened, laughed bitterly. Ezra raised his hand, rubbing his wrist, he could still feel the warmth lingered from Raphael's body temperature on his skin.

"Raphael."

Ezra tried to call again, for some reason his tongue wanted to call out the man's name, and when he saw Raphael hum and nod, he felt relieved.

"Raphael ... you are the one who brought me to this place, right?"

Raphael nodded again.

"Thank you." Ezra said those words in a voice as small as a whisper, not knowing if Raphael could hear him, but one glance on Raphael's face made Ezra realize the words clearly reached his ears.

His eyes widened hearing the words that had just come out of Ezra's mouth, as if those words were foreign to his ears so Raphael tilted his head, body slightly bent to get closer. Ezra clicked his tongue, embarrassment started creeping in and he averted his gaze from Raphael's eyes that scanned every corner of his face, as if reading every expression that was there, without leaving a single one.

"Ezra, you don't usually act cute like that, haha. You're welcome. I'm glad I could help you."

His cheeks burning hot, Ezra protested. "I only said the word 'thank you'! What's cute about that?!"

"Because usually you will push me away and tell me to leave you alone."

The smile that was on Raphael lips faded again, now replaced by a cold look that Ezra could never read, his tone was low as if he did not like those memory, Ezra swallowed hard, what Raphael said was true, he did not like it when people saw him in such a weak state, that later he would push whoever was near him to leave him alone.