MukomaTJ
Only made an account to say 'Harems are Trash', but now I can't find the fanfic I wanted to comment on!😂
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One of the best teases of a good Naruto fic out there 😅 The story ultimately goes nowhere but it has a great start. Truly unique in it's approach to a tired trope that's been abused a bit here (🙈 yes I am guilty of it too), bringing a bit of fresh perspective. Really gets me thinking of what could have been.
If you are here for an Itachi adventure in ATG, you may be disappointed. His characterisation here is so far removed from the original, it's hard to see him as Itachi. If you are here for Yun Che with sharingaan, you may find it refreshing. I'm in the first camp so I've gone as far as I can with it.🖖🏾 Writing Quality - good. Updating Stability - apparently dropped, but seems to have been ok while it ran. Character Design - more could have been done with Itachi. Even where he would have done the same as Yun Che, the motivation would be materially different
The whole 'orphan bringing us down ' thing doesn't make sense, especially in a warrior society. Fugaku also losing his cook to the point of shedding his dignity to beat up a kid seems unlikely. Perhaps if a different, more believable source of conflict was used...
This is one rework from being pretty good. I know that may change the author's intent, but as it is, it just has good bones. Writing Quality: technical issues plague it, but it is more legible than an MTL. Updating Stability: Seemed to have a good cadence until it stopped. Story Development: a little all over the place. Definitely one of the areas that would benefit from a rework. Character Design: MC is a bit reckless World background: Kishimoto does the heavy lifting here, which is understandable for a fic.
Severe lack of punctuation makes this irritating to read/listen to at times. The status screens are also a peeve of mine, sometimes feeling like they're half the content. It's not for me, but I can get how that's the whole point for others. Otherwise it's an interesting idea for an au fic. The concept has legs and I can only hope it gets a rework in future. It would elevate the work so much.