Chapter 40 Decisions

Explosions, roars, and the sounds of destruction boomed from the other side of the wall. Soldiers stood around in stunned and horrified silence as they listened to the carnage. Some had began to move up the side of the wall, but they hadn't crested the top, they were all too nervous to poke their heads over lest they be caught in the crossfire.

Among them rode Erwin, looking as certain and focused as always. None could tell if it was true or just an act, but they felt an inspired confidence regardless. His eyes were fixed to the top of the wall, his thoughts whirling away in silence.

What did they do?

A creature of incomprehensible power, that had annihilated one of their strongest weapon with but a brush of their hand. A creature that had taken the energy blasts of four of the strongest people in the entire military, yet it had done nothing. A creature, that was one of their own.

Word had managed to be suppressed of the creature's suspected identity, as well as the theory that Armin Arlert had presented to him in private. The ideas were without evidence, and logically he shouldn't take them as guaranteed. Yet, he found himself doing just that. The creatures origin from the destroyed headquarters, the shared tail, and the incredible power. Gohan was without question, the most powerful person at their disposal and most likely on the entire planet. If someone was to possess a transformation that sparked horror in the hearts of his most veteran soldiers, it would be Gohan.

Which left him with a problem.

A problem was an understatement if he was being honest with himself. Gohan had hidden a transformation that had offered incredible potential, yet an unstoppable level of destruction. In their attempt to subdue him, the special operations team had used every technique against him, with no result. No ki blast would harm him, no blade would scratch his nape. All of which he might be able to accept, were it not for the simple fact that this creature was uncontrollable.

He'd seen the carnage, even in the dim light of the full moon it had been impossible to miss. A series of deep grooves cut into the earth, trenches of torn up ground and craters littered the ground where the creature had moved, the very definition of an unstoppable monster. To the world, Erwin may have seemed like a man who had never felt fear, that his confidence in command was as unwavering as it was eternal, but that was of course not true.

He had known fear, he had known hesitation. Years of military service and the chains of command had moulded him into the man he was today, a man who could present utter calm, no matter what he truly felt. For Erwin was afraid. He was afraid of what the outcome of this would be. Would Gohan ever be trustworthy or controllable again? Was he ever able to be controlled? If word was to be spread about what Gohan was and what he had done, what would happen? He truly didn't know.

He'd personally seen the reactions to the revelation of Eren's abilities, yet those were paltry compared to Gohan. The military police and the church would be baying for his execution, but the public… The public would be unpredictable. Gohan had not been so privy to the information that Erwin had requested consistent updates on, as the mans influence had begun spreading quickly.

From Trost he had been known as an angel, a saviour. Fearless and powerful in as much as he was caring and kind. It was an apt description of the boy, especially when word had further spread about his abilities. The public did not know the true extent, only that he had supposedly been of exemplary talent and had been teaching all that he knew. A cult of personality had begun to form around him, as a saviour of humanity. If Eren was humanities wrath, then Gohan was humanities warmth, a powerful force that would keep them safe and loved. His supporters had started by copying his white headband, and from there it had spread.

A symbol of hope that all could share with each other. But now…

His gaze lingered on the ruined village, one that had thankfully been evacuated early on. He wondered how much Gohan had known that when he'd destroyed it. The boy showed some level of control and consciousness in his actions towards Mikasa Ackerman, yet utter recklessness in so many other ways. If they desired to, they may be able to squash any connection to Gohan. Claim the creature had been another Titan like the Marleyans, only out of control and turning on its allies. If they desired to…

Erwin found himself with a choice, a choice of whether or not he could or would ever trust Gohan again. The reasons not to were clear and all around him. Yet, it was also so clearly not a choice at all. For all of their attempts to rid the world of the Titans, to save humanity, it had all been a lie. Humanity was in no danger, the Eldians of Paradis were, set on a path of eventual extinction by an almost casual effort of the Marleyans. Four Titan shifters had been sent to investigate the walls, and only two of them had been needed to break Wall Maria and cause the deaths of hundreds of thousands.

They needed Gohan.

Eren was powerful, but he was limited, of the same power as their foes and with nary a shred of their Titan training. Nor was Eren the most stable of individuals. It was Gohan that had provided them with something to truly change their fate, to give them a power with which they could reclaim not only Wall Maria, but eventually all of Paradis, and maybe even their brethren from Marley.

Without Gohan, they were once more outmatched.

It meant that Erwin no longer had the question of what to do about Gohan, but rather what he would have to do to ensure his safety. For that, his enemies were not the threat beyond the walls, neither Titans nor Marleyans. The next threat was inside and around them. The nobles who had known, the king who had sat idly by while they were slaughtered, the Military Police who disappeared anyone who could have helped them advance. The knives in their back while they fought the Titans.

They would have to be dealt with.

"Commander." Ilse rode up to his side with a casual greeting. He gave her only a slight nod of acknowledgement, his mind still too distracted to focus on the previous orders he had given her. "The scouts have returned from the headquarters sir, it's a total loss. Casualties are still being confirmed, but among them they've… Hange and her team sir, all deceased."

A dull weight sat in his gut. He'd suspected it, the likelihood was just too high given the extent of destruction and lack of communication from her. Yet it sat heavily all the same. He had no idea how many soldiers had died under his command, but none as gifted an officer as Hange. She had been his selection for his replacement when this endless war inevitably claimed his life.

A talented scientist, a skilled fighter, and an outstanding officer. Her loss was significant, and irreplaceable. She had been someone he had called friend and trusted implicitly. Now, like so many others, she was gone.

"Thank you Langnar, is that all?"

"No sir. Some of the scouts managed to rally a few survivors, including Historia who was with Ymir."

He nodded, already knowing of Ymir's arrival on the eastern lines. "Mike had a runner inform me of her actions. Were there any issues?"

"None, in fact both were in rather high spirits. Historia made sure that word was passed along of some notes that Gohan had made, she said you'd find them very interesting."

His eyebrow raised in curiosity. "Have them brought over, then return to the eastern flank."

"Yes sir."

She slapped a salute onto her chest before riding off quickly. He could have asked her more, but he had noted the arrival of another whom he wished to discuss with in private. He moved towards the scowling and waiting form of Levi, noting the dirt and grime that covered the man, yet his focus seemed elsewhere enough that he wasn't even bothering to clean himself.

"That power, what did I miss?"

"A Titan unlike any other, in fact it may not even be a Titan at all. Strength and destruction like nothing we've ever seen, and it may be one of ours. Gohan."

Levi's eyes narrowed, a fury of betrayal building inside of him.

"That little brat. He's over the wall I can tell, do you need me to bring him in?"

"Can you?"

Levi was quiet and tense, eventually breathing out softly. "No. Not as a human, and definitely not as whatever that was."

Erwin nodded in appreciation, though he'd suspected the answer already. "The special operations team tried, no casualties." He added quickly as he noted the slight rising tension in his body. "No blade broke his skin, and energy blasts had no effect. Eren's Titan form was destroyed in a single blow."

"Shit. You said no casualties?"

"He has… some control. Enough that he hasn't harmed anyone of ours, only destroying empty areas and chasing the Titan Shifters. They fled to the other side of the wall, and he has followed." More explosions echoed from the distance, yet none felt any sympathy for those being chased by Gohan. "What we will do with him is undecided. What of the western flank?"

"They'll be finishing up soon. The Titans are just about finished, with no sign of a breach. I don't think there ever was one." He reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a small canister, the empty one that had been thrown at himself. "Ragako village, we found signs that the people were transformed there. Those injections that Ymir told us about, they can be used as a gas now. Needs a trigger though, I found some of the Marleyans still in the area, gathering intel on our capabilities I think. They had two other Titan Shifters in their ranks, an ape and some hideous thing that moved on all fours, used to cart supplies I think. I handled the ape, but the man inside was rescued by the other Titan while Marleyan soldiers attacked us."

"Their soldiers were here too?"

"Still are, most of their corpses anyway. We've got weaponry, gear, and a survivor for intel. One of the soldiers is the one who deployed that against me. Threw it, the man from the Ape Titan screamed, and two of the soldiers around me transformed into Titans."

A horrifying weapon. The implications and risks were terrifying, but it seemed there were limits. The surviving Marleyan would have to elaborate more on that for them.

"The Ape Titan, if he is needed as the trigger then we will need to ensure his capture or elimination. You said they escaped?"

"Likely over the wall. With any luck Gohan will find them and that problem with solve itself."

Erwin nodded as he contemplated. Eventually, almost hesitantly he asked the question he'd been building since Levi suggested one key detail. "You said the gas and transformation turned the others, why not you?"

"A good question. If anyone would have an answer it would be shitty glasses."

Erwin froze, and even in the pale moonlight Levi saw it as if the sun was shining straight overhead. There was a hitch in his breath. Not of panic, or distress, but sheer disbelief.

"She's…"

He left the question hanging, waiting for Erwin to silently answer with the nod of his head.

"The headquarters was destroyed in Annie's escape. Reiner and Bertholdt assisted, all three are now over the wall with Gohan in pursuit."

Levi took a step away, looking distantly at the wall. His hands gripped weakly at the swords in his sheaths. The anger was there, the fury, but it was all clouded by the muted shock of it all. He didn't like Hange, not at all on a personal level, but he respected her a great deal as a soldier.

The level of risk taking she would take personally always seemed to mark her for death, and yet years of surviving by the skin of her teeth had seemed to disprove that. With so many survivals of near-death experiences, the fact that she had inevitably met her end had been… hard to comprehend. Depressing seemed so minimal a word to describe how he felt, yet it was to an extent accurate. One of the best they had, finally snuffed out in a clash behind the lines and out of sight.

"Are we going over the wall?"

"Not yet. We'll wait until morning, regroup, rest, and assess the situation."

With the sound of destruction still echoing beyond the wall, Levi was more than happy to let the time pass.

The first hint of the coming sunrise that Eren felt was when he was being gently shaken awake by Mikasa. He had woken up after the battle, enough to be updated on the situation before being ordered back to sleep to rest up before the fight. It had been hard to do so, he and Mikasa laid side by side as they processed what she had learned. The short interrogation they'd received before Erwin had ordered them to be left alone for now.

It had not been a pleasant sleep.

Eren had been dreaming of the last time he'd seen his father, of one of the nights after Shiganshina. With no home, his mother crippled, his friend presumed dead, and his father had appeared so suddenly. Pulling him away in private, swearing for him to protect the key and reach the basement. Before disappearing forever.

He'd spoken with his mother about it, about whether or not she had seen him since Shiganshina, or knew anything else about that night, but she hadn't. He wondered why he had dreamt about that night, but the answer was obvious. He had remembered that night on the same day he'd first willingly transformed, that day in Trost. He, like Gohan, could transform, and be either a weapon to protect or a monster bent on destruction. For his friend, he did feel a level of kinship that he hadn't been able to feel anywhere else.

He had his questions, of course. Why, how, so many different things to ask. But what he did not have, was doubts. Both he and Mikasa had been unanimous on that, no matter what they found on the other side of the wall, he and Mikasa were going there to help their friend.

"It's almost time."

They climbed out of the tent together, one that had been provided as part of their expedition supplies. They would leave it to be disassembled by the Garrison, those who would be left to deal with the damage and the dead. They strapped their gear into place in silence, the ODM gear was the only thing they'd taken off to sleep in case they'd needed to be sent into action immediately.

They were ready to go quickly and used their gear to climb up the side of the wall. With the sun out and shining, the destruction behind them was all the clearer to see, yet it was nothing compared to what they saw as they finally crested the top. As far as the eye could see, was a ruin of a once green land. Craters, destroyed forests, the signs of fires that had been spread from Ki blasts. It was the aftermath of Gohan's rampage.

"What do you think he felt?"

Mikasa's question was soft spoken, almost a hushed whisper as she gazed across the ravaged land.

"I don't know. I… don't remember when I wasn't in control. I only have flashes of it afterwards. Destroying, fighting, killing…"

They were unpleasant memories, a time when he wasn't himself, a time when… he almost killed Mikasa. As if sensing his distress, Mikasa stepped closer to him, her hand brushing against his.

"It's okay. You're not like that anymore, I'm here for you."

He knew that. It was hard to truly realise that he did feel it, the comforting presence of her before him, knowing that she was there to protect him. To be protected, and to not feel anger, or shame, or fear… His hand slowly reached out, just a finger brushing against hers, before finally fully taking her hand in his.

"Thank you, Mikasa. Thank you."

It was overdue, and not nearly enough. He owed her apologies and thanks until the end of time. But they didn't have the time. With their mission about to begin, they had to focus on the task to come. Finding, and saving their friend.

"We'll do the same for Gohan. We'll be there for him."

"Well well, it's about time."

The voice had them both turning to see Hannes stood nearby, hands on his hips and smiling brightly. The two of them broke into a short run and crashed into him, wrapping their arms around him tightly.

"Hannes!"

"Hannes!"

"It's good to see you kids alright. Your mother and I had been wondering when you were going to stop being such a little brat Eren, I'm surprised Mikasa still likes you after so long."

The two pulled back, faces crimson. Mikasa's of embarrassment, Eren's of anger.

"What do you mean!? At least I've never been a drunk!"

"It's not like that Hannes…"

He laughed, making a swipe at Erens head who dodged back angrily. His laugh only grew, before settling as he gently laid a hand on Mikasa's head and tussled her hair softly. She blushed, but didn't pull away, enjoying the paternal affection she had been deprived off for too long.

"What are you even doing here Hannes?"

His expression grew more serious, and he pulled Mikasa back in for a hug as he looked at the two of them. "The same as you two, I'm heading out with you to put down that Titan. Seems pretty ballsy if you ask me to go all seek and destroy after last night but… what?"

He had noticed their downwards expressions, the secret glances between them. Mikasa sent a questioning look to Eren, who nodded back. She reached up, pulling Hannes down so she could whisper in his ear. The words were quiet, not heard by anyone but him.

"…oh."

He needed time to comprehend it, but they had no more to explain as they were ordered to descend downwards. Hannes would need time to understand, but he would keep their secret.

"All teams! Form up!"

"Jaeger, Ackerman, over here."

Eren and Mikasa took their place next to Captain Levi and the rest of the special operations squad. None of them looked like they had rested well, especially Petra. There was a cold fury that sat behind her eyes that was impossible to miss. However what surprised the two of them most of all, was the presence of Ymir.

"Listen up. You two need to get caught up on a lot, but there's no time. So here's the short version. Ymir can turn into a Titan like Jaeger-"

"WHAT!?"

"-and she's going to be joining us in the spearhead. Jaeger, I want you transformed for the whole trip, Ymir will change if it looks like there's going to be a fight. Ackerman, you and the rest of the team are on sensing duty. Focus on that, I'll give directions unless any of you pick something up. We'll be heading straight out, following the tracks of destruction."

They had a million questions to ask Ymir, but she was already moving off and climbing onto her horse like the rest of the team. Left standing awkwardly by themselves, all they could do was gently take the others hand in theirs. With a soft squeeze of reassurance, Eren moved off, getting some distance before he raised his hand up to his mouth.

With a final breath of preparation, he bit down.

"…isn't right, this is dangerous Reiner."

"We have to. We can't come back empty handed! They'll kill us Annie."

"Reiner you saw what he was like, you don't seriously think we could control him do you?"

"Bertholdt, you need to calm down. He's not going anywhere."

Gohans eyelids sat heavy, refusing to lift. His body was tired, but that wasn't it. Instead, his muscles felt drained, empty, as his mind floated at the edge of consciousness. It was like he was in an ocean, being pulled down just enough for his face to sit above the water. Awake, but barely, only enough to notice the presence of those around him and his hands bound behind his back.

"…what…?"

His words were slurred, and his breathing was laboured, but he felt their attention snap to him quickly followed by the settling of panic.

"He's awake Reiner!"

"It's fine, he can't do anything."

Reiner stepped in front of him, his vision was blurry but the blonde man was easy to recognise. He knelt down, gripping Gohans face with one hand and looking him straight in the eyes.

"Just what the hell are you Gohan?"

He tried to answer, but any words came out as nothing more than mumbles. Reiner pulled away and he heard Annie speak up again.

"He's too dangerous Reiner, we should just leave him and run. Can you even trust those damn notes?"

Turning his head, he managed to spot Annie. She was gesturing to something that Bertholdt was holding, something he recognised as Hange's notebook. His mind was muddy, but he put it together quickly, and felt behind him to the fur of his tail. It was wrapped tightly by cable, the kind from their ODM gear, and was squeezing it constantly. The cable led to the tree branch he felt beneath him and was the same source of the bindings on his hands.

His focus returned to the others, and he realised just why Reiner was the only one who had moved to his side. Annie was missing both of her legs below her kness, while Bertholdt was missing one entirely, along with most of his arm. Steam billowed off the both of them, as well as Reiners right hand, which seemed to only be a stump that had reformed, his fingers still missing.

"That woman kept notes on everything, and you can already see she was right. If it weren't for this notebook, we wouldn't know you hadn't said anything."

"I didn't!"

Annie hissed, taking the best defensive position she could while only being able to sit.

"We believe you." Bertholdt reached out a soothing hand and laid it gently on her shoulder. She flinched but didn't pull away.

"I didn't say anything. I didn't…"

She looked to be on the verge of crying before Bertholdt pulled her in close and glared at Reiner. As he was watching them, Gohan noticed something different about Annie, how her clothes were far different from the military clothes he'd captured her in, yet also not what he had expected from days of confinement. They were new, and not only that, undamaged around her stumps, folded up so they were visible and could be monitored.

From the corner of his eye, he spotted two backpacks laid against the trunk of the tree and deduced where the change of clothes had come from. As well, he thankfully realised that he wasn't nude, and was in fact dressed in some very baggy clothing.

His rustling caught the attention again of Reiner, who watched him briefly before figuring out what he had realised.

"You're lucky we brought spare clothes. Mine was the closest to you but, not exactly a perfect fit. Couldn't figure out what to do for your tail, sorry about that."

It was a surprisingly friendly perspective, not something he'd expected from his supposed capturers. He appreciated it though, and mumbled a slight thanks, though whether anyone could understand it he didn't know. It took a gathering of strength, but he managed to gather the energy to speak a clear sentence.

"What happened?"

"Isn't that what we should be asking you? You damn near killed us Gohan. You got distracted killing some other Titans, looks like you cleared out almost the entire wall. Even with that we didn't get out in one piece. Then all of a sudden, almost becomes daytime, you just roll over and shrink."

They had survived until the moon had faded away, impressive really. Though he imagined the state of the ground he'd left suggested more luck than anything else.

"Speaking of which. You… shrank. You're not like a normal Titan are you? What are you?"

It was a long answer if he decided to give it, but Gohan was happy enough to them something. He began to mumble something, which Reiner leaned in closer to hear.

"Just a kid, trying to save people."

Then he swung his forehead into Reiner's. With his pitiful strength, it did little more than stun him, but it was enough. He planted his feet firmly and pushed himself backwards. Without anyone able to immediately stop him, it was enough to slacken the ties and slip his hands free.

His hands being free meant little with his current strength, but he didn't intend on fighting them right now. Instead, he put his hands on the trunk behind him and shoved forwards. It was a minimal amount of strength, not enough to rip off the cables or loosen their knots, especially with such a small window of opportunity. Instead, Gohan had gone for something far riskier.

His body jerked to a halt as he reached the short end of his tether, the cables squeezing tighter around his tail to the point of almost drawing blood. But not before he heard a jerk and felt the slight ripping of tendons. With his body going completely slack, he managed to aim himself so that he fell sideways off the branch. His body swung limply, his body weight being held entirely through his weakened tail, but not for long. The damaged tendons were too weak, and one by one they ripped, his body falling free of his tail.

As his body returned to lucidity, agonizing pain shot through him. Pain, and power.

Ki flooded from his body as he pushed outwards, turning from a fall into flight and hovering back upwards towards the tree branch. His tail sat there uselessly, hanging from the tree just below the shocked and horrified expressions of Reiner, Annie, and Bertholdt.

He landed and let out a hiss of pain, teeth grit as the searing agony continued to work its way through his body.

"That hurt." His hand gripped into a fist as he breathed heavily, before throwing that fist into the trunk of the tree, tearing through the bark and shaking the entire structure. He let out a breath to calm down, finally being able to control the pain enough to clear his mind.

"Now… I think it's time we talked."