Chapter 11 Anakin

Anakin looked at his unconscious padawan on the ground and blinked at seeing her exposed midriff.

"Who the hell dressed her like that? She's practically half-naked," Anakin scolded in his mind. "Don't those idiots know there are sick people out there?" he sighed. Of course, he wasn't one of those sickos; he cared about his padawan's well-being, and she herself had said she didn't mind his attachment to her.

Some memories of Xion's life came to Anakin's mind, specifically an episode where Ahsoka was part of a group of women and they seemed to be close friends.

Anakin was in shock, trying to force his brain to give him a negative answer, but he couldn't deny the memories he had. Could it be that Ahsoka was a lesbian? Anakin shook his head, dismissing all such nonsense. If she was, then she was, and it was none of his business. Besides, he was her master, and those absurd feelings had to be discarded.

Anakin decided to sort out his padawan's clothing situation as soon as she woke up.

…

When Ahsoka regained consciousness, he helped her up.

After she had fully recovered and he saw her in her usual mood, Anakin spoke authoritatively.

"Ahsoka, let's go buy you some clothes," Anakin said. "That outfit isn't nice, you need something more striking, the armbands are fine, but you need something that commands more attention…" Anakin received a sharp elbow jab into his stomach, leaving him breathless.

As he promised before, he didn't defend himself at all, but he didn't think she would hit him so fiercely. Ahsoka took him by the arm and pushed him out of her room.

"Master, your clothes aren't the prettiest either!" Ahsoka said before slamming the door in his face. Anakin rubbed his nose. She had taken it as a personal criticism of her fashion sense.

"Ahsoka, this isn't what it looks like. I really like your clothes," Anakin tried to explain, but Ahsoka opened the door and looked at him coldly.

"I'm leaving now," Anakin said hurriedly and bolted out of there.

Anakin ran to his room and looked at himself in the mirror. He observed his smooth face and long hair, his sturdy clothes fitting his body, suitable for war. Unlike his memories of Xion, Anakin had no scars on his face thanks to his control over the Force and his emotions.

"Nonsense, my appearance is great," he told himself before heading straight to his lab to create more death spheres and stars for his padawan.

Anakin had collected data for the past two months and applied it to his creations, improving their response speed. He created five more spheres for Ahsoka and continued working on the death stars. Anakin called upon the Force to assist him in creating his tools of destruction, and it eagerly answered his call.

…

"Knight Skywalker, I see you have acquired more Kyber crystals," Windu said approaching.

Anakin turned around and saw Windu, Yoda, Adi Gallia, and Shaak Ti approaching him. He was stunned and didn't understand the purpose of this raid, as they had promised amnesty for anything he had said or done.

Anakin thought he was safe, but now he found himself in the middle of a raid, which meant there was a double raid. Perhaps these old folks just liked to harass people. As Anakin dismissed any jitters or emotions that could get him into trouble, Master Yoda walked with his cane to peek his head behind his back.

"New crystals you have obtained," Yoda confirmed with a nod. "Asajj Ventress, again you have lost," said Yoda.

Ventress had thrown her sabers off a cliff as she escaped in another direction, and Anakin had promised his dear padawan that he would retrieve those crystals, so the decision was obvious, and he leaped off the cliff in search of the crystals.

"Master, I have been careless," Anakin admitted humbly.

Anyway, this was also the Jedi's fault, as they didn't provide him with Kyber crystals and forced him to chase after Sith ones.

"Again, purified they have been," said Yoda.

"How strange, they were already like that when I found them," Anakin lied shamelessly.

Mace Windu gritted his teeth, but Anakin wouldn't admit under any circumstances that he could purify Sith objects. That could land him in disturbing and dangerous situations.

Things tainted by Sith emotions usually featured in some very unpleasant and horrifying horror stories. He wouldn't dare to flirt with the dark side willingly and make things easier for Palpatine.

Anakin stood firm under Windu's pressure. This big shot couldn't even intimidate him with a lightsaber anymore, so he could escape his wrath with impunity. Adi Gallia hurried to stand in front of Windu.

"The firing mechanism you have altered. A Force user you must be if these weapons you want to activate," said Yoda, looking at the lightsaber.

"You've modified your lightsaber," said Windu. That was definitely heresy to him, as there was indeed a ritual to assemble these things.

"I've added some security upgrades," said Anakin, and all the Masters looked at his sleek lightsaber design with polished enhancements. "I've also added some skins, doesn't it look great?" Anakin asked, although these elders must have never used the word "cool" in their lives.

"Cool," said Yoda, and Anakin almost jumped thinking he was reading his mind, but the little green guy was just repeating his words, apparently finding them strange.

"Explain security you must," said Yoda.

"Master Yoda, dozens of Jedi have died because an ordinary person has taken their own sabers and cut their heads off with them. My upgrade needs no more explanation than that," said Anakin. "Even a Sith who steals my lightsaber will have trouble using it correctly, assuming they know they need to use the Force to activate it and don't waste time wondering where the power button is," Anakin added.

"That could be useful," said Master Shaak Ti.

"Interesting," approved Master Yoda.

"Knight Anakin, do you have any other projects in progress?" asked Master Adi Gallia.

By her question, Anakin understood that this was not a raid, but a peace visit. It was his first peace visit, as before they had only conducted raids where they ended up fighting and he was punished. But now, the raid had been suffered by his padawan and they came in peace. This method was not entirely wrong and confirmed his plan to use Ahsoka as an ambassador to these elders. He was too stubborn and they too attached to tradition to get along; they needed an intermediary.

"I'm working on several projects, the most important of which is this," he said, pointing to a 20-centimeter-diameter black sphere with a polished metal surface.

Anakin touched it, and the sphere changed color, its surface turned white, and a pair of blue electronic eyes blinked.

"Massacre 2.0 activated, searching for targets," said the robot in a robotic voice. The Jedi masters tensed, but Anakin laughed.

Massacre 2.0 flew and examined each of them, causing the Jedi masters to blink due to the speed at which it moved.

"Massacre 2.0 is a prototype created by my greatest invention to date: nanotechnology. They are artificial cells with thousands of times the computing power of the most advanced droids, giving it superior motion control and unparalleled tactical deployment," Anakin presented sincerely.

Shaak Ti intervened before Windu spoke:

"What do you plan to do with this project?"

"The artificial cell technology I've designed for the Jedi Temple. The security of this place is disastrous, and with this technology, it would improve on several levels. As for Massacre 2.0, it's a prototype peacekeeper to replace the clone soldiers if this war ever ends. I'm planning to gift this prototype to Padmé as a starting test. She's always getting into trouble," said Anakin.

"Padmé, downloading files. Senator Padmé Amidala of the Galactic Council, downloading records, user approved, awaiting biometric confirmation," said Massacre 2.0.

"Records?" asked Windu.

"It's an algorithm for public records. If the senator doesn't meet certain transparency standards, he won't be approved by the system, as it also has within its programming to ensure compliance with Republic laws," explained Anakin.

"On what basis are those standards?" asked Adi Gallia. Anakin turned around and began to show them Massacre 2.0's programming regarding its assignments.

"We must test this. The senator is a good candidate," said Yoda. Anakin raised an eyebrow.

"A few hours ago, the senator stormed into the lair of a well-known criminal boss upon learning he was involved in the kidnapping of a child in the Hutt clan," explained Shaak Ti.

Anakin grimaced, recalling something of that. Padmé wasn't like other senators. Other senators would go and report crimes, and if the police told them they were busy, some would insist, but that was the most they would do. Padmé was different. She would go and report, and if she was told they were busy, she would pull out her blaster and switch her profession from senator to Terminator, plunging into action and leaving a trail of very surprised and injured criminals behind.

On the rare occasions when she couldn't handle it herself, Anakin already knew he had to come with an army behind him because things were really serious. So, Padmé was the only armed pacifist he knew, so he designed Massacre 2.0 with her in mind and, of course, his mother, because Palpatine might come up with the insane idea of wanting to harm her.

"The temple's security doesn't need improvements," Windu said, changing the subject and catching his attention. Anakin could only blink at that statement.

"We could use one or two guardian robots to test," said Adi Gallia. Shaak Ti nodded. They severely underestimated the capabilities of the Massacre robots, but Anakin nodded and ordered the computers to create two more prototypes.

Windu opened his eyes wide as the computer made the budget.

"Where does all that money come from?" asked Windu. "And why are these robots so expensive?" he added.

"From Chancellor Palpatine. He inherited his entire family fortune. He's a very good sponsor. As for the cost, the artificial cells of these droids are not easy to produce, and superconducting materials are needed for their manufacture," explained Anakin.

The Jedi masters blinked at his audacity in taking advantage of Palpatine. He had given him a blank check, and Anakin supposed he thought he wouldn't take advantage, but he had already spent millions and millions on his personal projects.

Master Yoda was the only one to furrow his brow, finding such generosity strange, as Palpatine was no philanthropist.

"The Supreme Chancellor has great consideration for you," said Yoda, asking a veiled question that sounded like a compliment. Anakin pretended not to pay attention and replied:

"I'm a hero to Naboo, the Chancellor always tells me." This time even Adi Gallia, who was the most distracted of the masters, as she was reviewing the security system programming that Anakin had designed, turned to look at him. "Senator Amidala also supports me, but she doesn't have as much money, and she's always breathing down my neck to see what I do with it…" Anakin didn't say more, just looked at them and sighed. Master Shaak Ti cleared her throat.

"We should call the Senator to inform her about Knight Skywalker's project," Anakin nodded, as initially he hadn't planned to ask for permission, and it surely would have been another fight.

…

Senator Amidala arrived an hour later and was called to the council, where she gave Anakin a subtle look of "What the hell did you do this time?"

"I haven't done anything, this time I'm part of the judging panel because the Council wants to offer you something," Anakin said as an introduction, and Padmé was surprised because whenever she went there, she ended up taking responsibility for Anakin's actions.

The Council spoke, and Padmé agreed to try out the Massacre 2.0 robot, as anything that favored removing the army from service was to her liking. After saying goodbye to her, Anakin didn't forget to stop by Palpatine's office to boast of his achievements and subtly accuse the Council of harassing his padawan. He also boasted of beating Count Dooku, and finally, he returned to his laboratory, but at midnight, he grimaced and headed to a meditation room.

…

"Pain and unease, sadness and melancholy," said an elderly and gentle voice in front of him. Anakin opened his eyes to see Master Yaddle in front of him. It was already noon the next day.

"These are not my feelings," Anakin said as Master Yaddle sat down in front of him. "Another war, another separatist invasion, or Jedi whose lives are extinguished," Anakin said. "Betrayal… no, just desperation," he added with a grimace. Master Yaddle nodded.

"It is regrettable and it is the burden of a Jedi seer, especially one as powerful as you," said Yaddle. Anakin nodded, although he suppressed his own power and was afraid of it," she added, and Anakin stopped halfway through a nod, then frowned at Yaddle.

"Elder, I don't know what you're talking about," Anakin said.

"Anger is always your reaction when reality doesn't fit your plans," said Master Yaddle, and Anakin hurriedly forced away his emotions. Yaddle grimaced.

"What?" asked Anakin, not understanding. "Do you want me to keep these emotions?" Anakin asked. Yaddle shook her head.

"What you're doing now is precisely the opposite, you're repressing your emotions and creating a barrier between your feelings and your reason, without giving yourself time to reflect. And you're doing it consciously," accused Yaddle, making Anakin tense up. "Knight Anakin, what scares you so much, what causes you so much fear?" Yaddle asked, and Anakin stopped feeling his heart beat. He was rushing to discard everything by force when Yaddle spoke again.

"The Council is aware of your feelings towards Ahsoka, so I had to use my influence to have her assigned to you," said Yaddle, and Anakin was shocked.

"What!" Anakin reprimanded angrily. Yaddle nodded.

"Based on the feelings you expressed the first time you met her, I assumed she could help you destroy the barrier you've imposed between your emotions and your reason, but I was wrong, and I only got you to try harder, so now I must use a more direct method," said Yaddle.

Anakin clenched his teeth, as all his recent misfortunes were this old woman's fault.

"Master Yaddle, you have no idea the nonsense you're spewing," growled Anakin, trying to control his fury, but being told to his face that she deliberately caused him trouble made it extremely difficult for him to stay calm.

"Feelings are not nonsense, Knight Skywalker, especially not those of a Jedi with such an affinity for the Force, as you are," Master Yaddle said calmly, a calm that contrasted with Anakin's growing rage.

"Elder, you have no idea the kind of nonsense you're talking about…"

"But you do, Knight Skywalker, because you possess knowledge about them, just as you did about this war before. The Council listened to you, and as you warned them on many occasions, the moment when you could tell us the future you know has passed, and now you try to save everyone on your own, engaging in a battle where all the weapons are pointed against us," Yaddle said with a sigh. Anakin was paralyzed. He really couldn't say anything. Master Yaddle nodded gravely.

"Having withdrawn from the Council to be by your side has given me certain perspectives, and I could also imagine who my executioner would be when Dooku turned out to be a Sith," said Yaddle, and Anakin went pale. She was a Jedi, and with that alone, the Force should have guided her. Yaddle nodded with a sigh of regret.

"Palpatine and the clone soldiers," said Yaddle, and Anakin looked around. "Knight Anakin, when your feelings are unleashed, you lose your affinity with the Force. I've placed shields in this place a while ago. Had I not done so, this entire planet would feel your uncontrolled emotions, as a result of suppressing them for years without facing the reasons behind them. You've only been accumulating them, not getting rid of them," Yaddle reproached softly. "Knight Skywalker, what do you fear so much?" Yaddle asked seriously. Anakin couldn't help but recall memories of black armor, images of Padmé, and offspring they would never have.

"I'm not avoiding my feelings. Padmé doesn't really love me. She would turn away from me if she truly got to know me," Anakin said through clenched teeth. To his surprise, Yaddle nodded.

"She's young, she only knows people who hide their thoughts every day. She admires your rebellion," Yaddle said, shaking her head with a half-smile. "But she doesn't see beyond it," she said, becoming serious again. "She ignores your pain and doesn't see your frustration, although it would be obvious to anyone who truly knows you, so you're right. She doesn't know you, and I don't think she would understand what it would mean for you to decide to be with her as a Jedi. She wouldn't understand the weight of such a decision," she concluded with regret.

Anakin closed his eyes. He already knew those words, he knew them better than this old woman, for he had seen with his own eyes how Padmé looked at him in the darkness and turned away, giving up and abandoning everything, leaving him in darkness forever. A darkness he would plunge into without hesitation for her, guided by his selfishness and his own pride, which only needed a small push, and he lost his reason.

"Anakin, do you know the reason why the Jedi Council has such a poor opinion of visions of the future?" Yaddle asked.

"Because they're stubborn old folks?" Anakin asked with a grimace.

"Because Jedi who see the future live in fear of it, just like you're experiencing right now," said Yaddle. "In the past, many fell to the dark side because of this, and it's what palpatine will undoubtedly use against you, as you're allowing it yourself, giving him all the emotional burden to cloud your reason.

"Anakin, your fear of becoming a Sith is playing into his hands; it's the emotion you're repressing that will make you fall, as these are the greatest force of the dark side against a sensitive. You're not fighting Palpatine by refusing to feel; you're doing what he wants, that's why he's playing your game and giving you everything you want to make you believe you're winning," said Yaddle with sorrow.

"No, you don't understand. I know his plans," Anakin said through clenched teeth. "He wants to use Padmé and push me into despair…"

"Anakin, you're already in despair; you have no hope. You don't trust yourself. You dare not to feel, to dream, or to cry," Yaddle concluded, and her words plunged him into despair.

"If I fail, the Jedi die. I fall to the dark side. I become a tool of perpetual suffering. Before, there was a small light at the end of this, a hope for a future, for my death would bring the coveted balance.

"But all of that is bullshit!" Anakin rebuked. "There's no peace. My son dies like trash, so does my daughter, their offspring are such trash that only for him would I decide not to have children, and nothing for which I'm supposed to die is worth anything. Everything is trash, there's no hope, I can't accept that shitty future," Anakin said, but not with anger, just pain and a growing sense of defeat, because everything Master Yaddle said was true.

He was walking the same path as that Anakin in Xion's memories… no, he was even worse, that Anakin at least allowed himself to feel, he didn't, he just discarded everything, even though he himself thought the Jedi were idiots for doing so, but he had told himself he was different.

Anakin bent over at the waist and his tears spilled.

"I don't want to be a Sith, I already know what it is and what it will turn me into. But I can't be a Jedi," Anakin said.

"There's still a path, and you refuse to take it, I can feel it," Yaddle said.

"Master Yaddle, stop saying nonsense, I'm having a crisis here," Anakin reproached, making a great effort not to start crying.

Of course, there were more feelings in him, and they were the feelings of a shitty nerd who thought he was a god. To him, Anakin was a character he liked, and this world, at most, a tourist spot. Whatever happened didn't matter to him, because in the end, he was a god, and his power was beyond mere reason.

Of course, that shitty nerd forgot that if he died before his shitty ascent to divinity, there would be nothing to do, and he also omitted that it might be the case that his power would be sealed forever in this world, in which case he wouldn't be a god anymore. They were gambling with their lives and everything that was valuable to Anakin…

Master Yaddle had risen at some point and placed her hand on his head.

"Chosen One, you still have a path, but only you can choose to walk it," Yaddle said and turned to leave.

"You're just a shitty nerd!" Anakin rebuked.

"I'm not afraid of myself," he said to himself with absolute calm. There was no fear, no despair, or an ounce of frustration there.

"It's painful," Anakin said.

"Pain and happiness are part of life. If you don't want to suffer, just die," he said to himself.

"Your advice is bullshit," Anakin said.

"You're more bullshit than my advice. Just stop whining. If you're going to cry, cry and move on. It's stupid to be afraid of yourself," Anakin said, and his tears turned into sobs.

…

The next day, Anakin watched the sunrise. Master Yaddle, approaching his meditation room, entered through the door.

"Knight Skywalker," Yaddle greeted, and Anakin nodded, though he didn't feel like talking, and they both watched the sunrise.

…

"Are you okay?" Yaddle asked when Anakin sighed.

"No, it's too painful. I can't see her right now, I can't hide the bond I've created," Anakin said. Yaddle nodded.

"I'm not repressing it, I just don't want to bother her…" Anakin said.

"With nonsense?" Yaddle asked, and Anakin nodded with a half-smile.

"I'm not repressing anything, I just don't want to set a bad example for her," Anakin said.

"Chosen One, as long as you accept yourself, your path will always be the right one, because it's where the Force guides you," Yaddle said.

"Master Yaddle, I've already told you where my path will end. What I'm following now are…" Anakin felt too ashamed of himself to say that he was now following Xion's advice, that shitty nerd who paid more attention to a colorful spider than to a life-or-death battle, even though for him it was just entertainment. Still, Anakin would pay attention to the battle. He and Xion were too opposite, and Anakin only followed his path because he truly had no choice.

"I can get you two days," Yaddle said before leaving the room. Anakin took a deep breath. He truly couldn't face Ahsoka in that state. And thinking of her, he realized she was truly a bad influence.

Anakin sighed. His bet with the Anakin in Xion's memories was going very badly when it came to Ahsoka. Their encounter was a disaster.

"I can still fix it," Anakin declared and gazed at the sunrise again.

…

The next sunrise was like the first, and so was the third.

Anakin stepped out of his meditation room, where he hadn't meditated at all. It had been over ten years since he took a day off from his meditation.

Anakin took a deep breath and left the room.

"Goodbye Padmé!" he said with just a hint of pain in his voice.

…

"Master," Ahsoka called from behind as Anakin headed to see the Council walking through one of the temple's wide hallways. Anakin gestured for her to walk beside him.

"Master, you look different," Ahsoka said, squinting her eyes and sensing him.

"I've left something behind that I considered very valuable," Anakin said earnestly. Ahsoka blinked, not understanding what he meant.

"Ahsoka, because of my attachment towards you, I've been somewhat lax as a master, and I think I need to adjust your discipline," Anakin said seriously, because she was truly too reckless, and he only encouraged that behavior due to his own personality. They were too similar for him to see things clearly, but if he didn't reprimand her, it would only escalate.

Anakin had to act like Obi-Wan so that Ahsoka would stay calm and create certain boundaries in her discipline. Although it would be difficult to see her mistakes because they were the same as his, he must at least try.

"Master, the thing with your clothes was a joke!" Ahsoka cried.

"Ahsoka, first lesson, your master is a Jedi sensor, and your feelings are always on display," Anakin said, and Ahsoka tensed.

He had already subtly warned her about it on the cargo ship when they were heading to Tatooine, but she only thought about it for a second and then dismissed it, just as he would with such things.

Anakin sighed as Ahsoka walked as stiff as a board. For them to understand, they had to use a club and hit them directly on the head; stealth tactics would only be ignored.

"We'll work on it. The skills I'm teaching you will help, as they will increase your control over the Force, and with it, you'll be able to enhance your mental shields. So, even if your emotions overflow, others won't be able to use them against you," Anakin explained. Ahsoka sighed.

"Is that what you do?" she asked with a certain accusing tone, because Anakin always hid his feelings from her, and it was impossible not to notice. Anakin nodded, and Ahsoka blinked in surprise.

"In the face of anger, the calm of unconcern, and in frustration, the tranquility of amusement. Still, it's not enough. You must always confront your problems head-on," Anakin said with a sigh.

"Then you'll lower your shields," accused Ahsoka.

"Ahsoka, I said your problems, not mine," Anakin said.

Ahsoka rolled her eyes. She suspected he was the one who created that bond with her, but that wouldn't help her. If anything, it would create more trust between them, and this Padawan needed discipline because, like him, she had tons of confidence.

NA: In the next episode, we will return to Ahsoka, and the war will begin, with space battles and unleashed blaster fire, as it is time to focus a little more on politics, which was the central plot of the Clone Wars and the Federation's invasions of Republic and neutral worlds, to add them to their ranks. So, Ryloth is coming.