[XXXI] - Shadow Master

"Where is my coat?!? Where are these items?! Can you possibly know how valuable were these to me?! What have you done with them?!"

The doctor was as shocked as me when I almost threw him flying at his messy desk.

"I… There wasn't anything in your coat that I found." — His wide eyes were looking at me with surprise, but no fear at all.

"Liar!!! You are all liars!!! No one has ever been honest to me, and I've learned my lesson. In this city, we all lie. Nothing is true and everything is a hoax… " — My loud words were being thrown at him like a waterfall, making his face wince.

I've looked around the office, on the filled up bookshelves, the working computers, empty beds with terrifying snow-white sheets. I smelt medicine and suffocating sterileness. And then I glared deep into his eyes, tired of everything.

The pair of glasses on his face have tilted, and his almost transparent hair created an image like a calm sea at a sunny noon on the desk.

His long hair fell behind his head, towards the desk, making me see his young and smooth face more clearly. It was different yet beautiful at the same time. He looked so fragile… I feel like crushing him with my hands, yet he isn't scared at all… His facial features… were almost artificial. But the emotions were more human than anyone's else.

Where there's no fear, acceptance of the fate rises. But he maybe isn't terrified because he knows I won't hurt him.

Deep inside of me I would never kill anyone…

…

Looking at his calm eyes, I came to my senses. He actually tried to get my hands off him. But I didn't even feel the touch.

Calming down, the feelings of wrath and irritation left my mind and stopped showing on my face.

"…If I only had items you spoke about, I bet they would have been a massive turn in my research. However, right now, I'm stuck in the middle, with no clues of what to do next. I wouldn't be so melancholic right now, no scientist can be so when their research is progressing like that. Yet no book, no pills, are in my possession. And by your worries, this worries me too because of who might have stolen these precious things…" — He struggled to speak as he was pushed against the desk, lying below me.

However, the words he spoke seemed to be true.

There couldn't be an option that they fell out of my pocket. I would feel the difference in the weight, especially when it comes to the heavy notebook. So analyzing the people I've met on my way…

"I've met no one besides Aura who came to rescue me, then this blonde reaper looking weirdo… And all the rest that came afterwards…" — I've told him, wondering is any of them responsible for stealing…

But his face suddenly turned blank as I told him about the blonde-haired guy I met.

Looking at this man's surprised face, I didn't expect him to react like that.

"Did he… have long hair and scarlet eyes…?"

His eyes became hollow and emotionless, staring deeply at the ground.

Huh… How did he know?

If no one told him about it, he wouldn't be so surprised, yet he knows who am I talking about…

Well, a person like that is really hard to forget.

"Yes… Wait, do you know him?"

But only an awkward silence was given as an answer.

Actually, looking closer, these two had quite the similar hairstyle. A low ponytail, with messy long bangs. And I think that both of them… Had their hair tied with the ribbon of the same color… But…

He felt that my glare has become a searching one, but couldn't possibly guess what I was thinking.

Maybe I just exaggerate. Could such two different people be tied with each other? I'm not sure anymore. Why would I keep attention to such small details anyway?

"Did he have freckles?" — This unexpected question broke the silence.

He suddenly changed his attitude after asking that one. And this demolished my whole theory.

"No, not at all."

"Then he is not the one I thought about… And I wondered if this was the man in our crew who betrayed us." — His voice sounded very calm.

A change of the tone out of nowhere… I felt something wasn't right here.

I noticed he can change his emotions so swiftly, this doesn't feel right…

"Can you let me go?" — This question came to my ears, when I realized I was still holding the weak body of this man against the desk.

"Oh… uhm… sorry…" — I quickly let off this man's coat after I realized what an awkward situation this was. Cooling off my emotions, the sudden tiredness surrounded my body again. I…

I burst with emotions and let them take control of me… If he wasn't such a collected person, I wondered what could've happen, if this was some much more dangerous, easier to anger person, with some abilities… If there is one thing I hope I can learn here… Is to tame my emotions and not let sudden fury take control over me anymore.

Looking at the ground embarrassed, I tried to explain myself, so I told him about the lost things:

"These were the last things I took from my home, before everything was taken away. I'm drawn to the things that will keep me remember about how it was."

But after I let him go, he wasn't mad at all.

His usual expression of neutral warmness returned, comforting me somehow.

"If I get any information on them, I will be sure to return them to you."

This doctor… Would a mere human act like that right after someone just discharged their negative emotions on them?

I didn't know what to think about him anymore. I didn't know what to talk about either.

The bed squeaked under the weight of my body falling on it. It felt really heavy and weak.

"How are you feeling right now? Does anything hurt you?" — He asked with a gentle tone, sitting on the chair behind his desk.

"I'm just… Very tired… I…"

I wanted to explain my feeling to him, but…

We both glared at the ground in silence…

"Then you should go and recover some strength before you officially meet everyone else." — He gave me an answer I desired… but not entirely.

Everyone…

What is the definition of it? Will I even want to introduce myself to anyone?

I got anxious about thinking of meeting other people. I was never good at handling first impressions and maintaining a relationship. It was hard as everyone considered me to be a 'different' looking weirdo, who acted like from another place. People bullied me for nothing, and the others wouldn't even come up and talk because the ones didn't allow them too. Peer pressure, what a cruel thing. But with time the bullies get bored over you, and they pick another targets. That's when the real loneliness kicks in, as you watch the predators hunt again. And you're hopeless about regaining some social status.

And now… meeting the people I would have to work with, If I only find some strength to do it anyway… Getting a fresh start in developing some connections, if they even prove to be useful somehow…

I've already met some of them. And as for now, neither of them had any good intents towards me.

Noctis, the creepy one from the hallway. I can already tell he is the egoist type of a guy, who thinks of himself as the strongest individualist. Disgusted with the weak, he didn't seem a guy to get well along with.

Aura, she might have come and rescue me, but probably because she was ordered to as my colleague, and sweetalking me to force me to come back here… I don't think I can trust that girl.

Silen, the crazy psycho who got me all up on this with his mind games, he destroyed my evidence and as a revenge got beaten up by me, but he seemed to weirdly enjoy this… I prefer to stay as far away from this masochistic man as possible.

As I can barely recall, there was also a blond haired girl that came with him to the grand hall

And ending my summary, a person standing next to them, the man himself the pursuer, the oppressor, the villain. Orbis. His penetrating gaze never leaving mine alone, a complicated person who killed thousands, with me as a witness. Not wanting to let me go, he is the last person I want to work with.

But these are only 5 people, and me being the last one from the 9, there are at least 3 other chosen ones similar to me. I wonder if they are any better…

After a long while of thinking, his voice made me come back from flying too far away with my thoughts.

"I think you should go rest now. If you have any difficulties with falling asleep, and I doubt, I can give you some sleeping pills. Safe. Tested and developed by me. I wouldn't treat myself with some bad things."

"Thanks, I don't think I'm gonna need any of them…" — I told him as I yawned loudly.

I stood up from the bed I was sitting on, but my vision went blank just after. Taking steps made my mind dizzy and everything spin. But I had to pull myself together and cope with this, so when doctor immediately stood up to support me, I just blocked him of with my hand. He stopped midways, glaring dully.

"After going out of here, turn right and pass the black door, the next one will be gray, and inside you will have a dark room with a bed you can sleep on. No annoying lights, no balking noises, Be assured, no one will disturb you until you get a solid portion of rest." — He slowly sat down, ending his words with a quiet sigh.

I've… got to learn so much…

I've had mixed feelings about what to think. But I was glad someone finally has told me the most I wanted to hear. Great lies or the bitter truth… I had to decide what to do with it myself. As for now, my mind was like a dense liquid, not allowing me to collect my thoughts…

A plenty of rest and time was required for a conclusion.

"…Thank you, doctor…" — I let out these quiet words out of me, hoping he wouldn't hear them.

But I was mistaken.

"I was glad to help… despite bringing all of this upon you…"

"…"

"I know it's difficult. But as a human, we have this great ability to quickly adapt. Time heals everything. You won't even see when your anxiety passes away here. There is no danger awaiting you in these corridors. You don't have to worry anymore. If you have anymore questions, you can ask me anytime."

I hope what you are telling is true, doctor.

"… Alright" — I answered him.

I had many questions, but they have seemed to melt in my consciousness as I fell even more tired and tired. The only thing clear in my mind was to throw myself on a bed and fall asleep.

I nodded at the doctor and tumbled myself out of the office.

…But as I thought no one will be outside, a person emerged from the darkness out of nowhere.

With my vision being blurry, not expecting him to be standing there, I didn't notice when this person came inside.

As a result bumped into him, with our cheeks touching.

"Agh!!! What the hell?!" — The man annoyingly asked, scratching the cheek in the place it touched mine. — "Watch where you're going, rat."

Giving me a disgusted glare with his pitch-black eyes, I've just sent him a tired and angered gaze with a message being: "scram"

The person was the same tall and black-haired guy who assaulted me in the corridor earlier. It seems he has come here for his lesson, as some stress could be seen in his almond black eyes.

I've ignored him and went outside, my nerves were in the verge of sanity. I wouldn't cope with another scene. An eternal rest was awaiting me in a dark room.

But before I went deeper inside of the corridor, to the place the doctor told me about, something inside me told me to stop behind the wall. Near the slightly opened door which hadn't been closed fully, a sharp strike of light was coming to the dark corridor.

I silently came closer to it, to get a look inside. Barely seeing anything, I just heard a deep voice say, trying to remain cool:

"You asked me before to come."

"Yeah, I did…

…How long have you been standing in that corridor there?" — The voice of the doctor changed to an entirely new one I haven't heard before…

…A teasing one?

"You think I would waste my precious time waiting for someone inside to come out? I came when I told myself to and even if someone was inside, I wouldn't care. I just had a fortuity coming in time with this guy exiting."

The door suddenly opened themselves a tiny bit, allowing me to see something more other than just a blurry image. I finally saw what was happening inside, just to notice the gaze of the doctor pierce him sharply.

A dangerous gaze, which made shivers go down my spine. So he was capable of… also become that…

"I want you to explain to me why you accused me of experimenting on life human subjects. And told it to a newbie."

His voice was serious and cold and the same time.

"…"

"…Do you have any kind of grudges against me, Noctis?"

But the man in black just sighed and looked at the ceiling.

"Why are you lecturing me. You're just like the old man. One word wrong and the entirety of your reality crumbles. Chill out."

Although the doctor has seemed to become seriously aggravated, letting out an unbelieving "huh?".

"I want you to learn your lesson not to speak about me like that. A person who helped you regain yourself from the world of darkness, I think I'm worth some basic respect. It's making me sad, seeing you consider me to be just another madman in this city… I'm one of your supervisors, if you like it or not."

His voice at the end turned into a sorrowful one. This made Noctis probably reminiscence a little about his behavior…

"Sure doc. But you are mistaken about something.

I am darkness. I still live in it."

The seriousness was still handing in the air, making the atmosphere inside that room heavy.

"…I still wonder where did you get a stupid idea like that… How could I experiment on people when our goal is to help them…" — The doctor scratched his head and looked inquiringly — "Have you perhaps seen something suspicious?"

"I've seen many weird things, and you know that doc… And seeing such a devastated shell of a human walking freely in our "safe" zone didn't left me much space to wonder of the purpose." — The dark-haired man crossed his arms, still holding something heavy inside of him.

But suddenly the expression of the doctor changed, as if he came up with a most probable answer and explanation.

What was the weirdest thing about this, is that the white-haired man lips curved into a soft smile.

"Yet I don't think you would let out such a premise… So that's what it was all about… You're just angry at me.

It's about those cigarettes that I took away from you that Silen found?"

"SO IT WAS SILEN?! This motherfucker…"

The man reacted more furiously than one could expect, backing himself a step back from the shock in his voice.

And the reaction of a doctor… He just aggravated a bull.

"Noctis…"

"I'm going to beat the shit out of this loser! I'll tear his stupid squealer face apart…" — I saw this man clenching his fists and burst out these embittered words with gritted teeth.

"No. You know smoking is prohibited…"

"No shit." — Noctis put his hands on his hips, and sarcastically answered the doctor, with him letting out a loud sigh.

But it seemed the black-haired man quickly realized he was being impolite and explained:

"You know, it's the only thing that calms me down in this shithole."

"Ahhh… Is this place truly bad? Maybe I should treat you with something?" — The doctor proposed.

"No way I'm drugging myself."

"You're literally addicted to nicotine Noctis."

"Shut up."

"Hah… Oh, these young people. So chaotic, yet predictable… And I thought it was something serious."

"What makes you so happy, geezer?"

"Ahh…" — A faint smile I didn't even see growing on the face of the doctor, disappeared from his face in seconds, as if this man was reminded of the painful reality. — "Nothing really."

"And who is the one chaotic here?"

The doctor responded to him with a piercing glare.

"Can I go now?

"Yes, But no more talking nonsense and abusing other people?"

"Well… the rat guy seems a weak target, but at least he is not as annoying as the main clown of our group." — The black-haired man was reminded of the cause of his fury.

"Noctis I beg of you, don't…" — The doctor shook his head in disbelief and worriness.

But there was no response, as the black-haired man started suddenly backing himself up, to exit the room.

"At least tell Silen to come visit me."

"He will have to after I break his nose.

Libertas quae sera tamen!"

These were the last words he told the doctor, with a teasing tone. He turned towards the corridor I was standing on, making his annoyed face visible and coming closer to me.

Oh no…

I'm… Just in the sight of reach…

The nervousness made my ears itch, as I heard only louder steps of this man coming towards me.

I had only a few seconds, yet I didn't think of anything to do. Falling in the sea of panic, my stomach burst with immense pain, making me unable to think what to do.

Oh shit, if he sees me, I will be in great trouble.

I… If I run, they will hear my steps echo in the corridor… But if I don't move… He… Will definitely see me and then think I eavesdropped on them.

I wouldn't like that happening… and worsening my relationship with this person, which is already bad from what I've heard.

Being petrified in place, I begged inside of my mind.

I want to melt in the darkness…

I want to disappear!

Please.

Don't see me.

I held my breath in and didn't even dare to move from my place, when the man came out of the room.

I glared at him with a terrified expression, quietly pushing myself as far as I could against the dark wall besides.

Yet, when he exited the room… the man went just past by me, not even turning a blink to me and reacting.

Has he…what?

Did he ignore me? Or am I…

But I couldn't even rest with ease, when He stopped in the middle of the corridor like 2 meters away from me.

This made my whole body shiver in fear, which I wanted to suppress somehow.

His body slowly turned back, towards me, as if he sensed something, and slowly started searching the empty and dark corridor with his stare.

I could say our eyes met for a second

But… His stare didn't stay in place. He just looked disorientated around the place and turned himself and went forwards…

Why haven't he seen me?

What?

Have I… Disappeared?

I let out a deep breath out of me, making sure he is nowhere to be seen.

Turning my head surprised left and right, after knowing there is no one left in that corridor, I swiftly moved myself to the room the doctor told me about.

Not even knowing how fast I got there, I closed the door well behind me with an impact. Being so exhausted I didn't have energy to turn my body from the uncomfortable position, I landed on a soft bed. I lied in one place, and didn't even notice when I felt asleep, wanting to forget all of the stressing situations today.