Chapter 23 - I'll always be there...

"Um", Taeyang cleared his throat, "Who are they?"

"Trust me, I tried to shake them off", I said. 

"Listen mister rich dude", Chloe said, "We can't just let our Mae walk around meeting random people. We're here to make sure that you don't try anything funny".

"You realise that you don't sound very threatening in that position right?" I said. "Because I swear I can't breathe".

All my friends decided to come along to meet Taeyang. Their odds were greater than mine so I naturally had no choice, which made me regret telling them about it in the first place.  And right now, all five of us were squashed into one booth. Five of us including-

"I had to come!" Dan-Oh said. "I haven't seen this guy since the wedding".

She had managed to wedge herself between me and Darcel, which must've been super uncomfortable. If she was, she didn't show it. 

"You're the one to talk", Nyx muttered. Unfortunately, she was squashed against the window…and she was as grouchy as ever. 

"Taehy-... Taeyang, these are my very loyal friends", I said. 

"Oh, I see," He said. 

For some reason he had changed his usual hairstyle. So, now it was more like, side swept bangs and swept back hair. Like I said…. He keeps getting attractive. With his gold and black jacket, he looked like a model. I unfortunately had to struggle to stop myself from blushing because he kept the top two buttons of his black shirt unbuttoned. And trust me, it was very distractive. 

I started the introduction from the corner of the window. 

"This is Nyxadora, Nyx for short. Never call her by her full name".

"Hmph!" Nyx huffed, her face red with sweat.

"Chloe", I indicated to her. She was as usual, bubbly as ever despite her threats. 

"Hiii!" She shook his hand enthusiastically. 

Right next to me was-

"Dan-Oh", Dan-Oh said, "I was her closest maid, Jiao-Jiao. I'm pretty sure you remember me".

"Oh yeah", Taeyang scratched his neck, "I remember the first time I saw Mae at the pond, you were with her".

"Mmhm", She looked proud. " That's right. I work at a supermarket and I met Mae there. I don't go to the art college unfortunately".

"And this is Darcel", I pointed at my dark friend who was sitting with a bored look on her face. 

"Wassup", She said. 

Even though she looked nonchalant, I was pretty sure she was as charged as a live wire. Pretending to be uninterested, according to her, was the best way to analyse someone without being obvious. 

"You've got some interesting friends," Taeyang said, stirring his tea. 

Like the great dukes of the ancient, he enjoyed drinking tea. English breakfast. I hated tea. The smell of it made me sick. I think it had something to do with visiting a tea factory when I was young. The smell of tea leaves overwhelmed me, and ever since that day ... .I became a coffee lover. 

"I do", I said, "So, can we get to the point now? It's getting kind of hot in here".

If Min Joon was here, he'd probably say something lame like, Is it because I'm here?

But, Taeyang on the other hand went straight to facts. 

"Yes, of course", He said, setting his cup down with a tink. "So, like you've all guessed, I died. Suicided in fact. Why? Because I was tired of my dad and with all the happenings I couldn't bear it any longer".

"Your dad became emperor?" I asked.

"Yes, him", Taeyang said, "Not me. After everything I did, I was just another useless prince".

"But, isn't being a prince fun?" Chloe asked. 

Nyx flicked a finger at her head, "You're thinking of disney princes. This is real life Chloe, nothing's fun in reality".

"Oh you!" Chloe grumbled rubbing her head.

"That's very hard core", Taeyang said, "But it is true, when it comes to my case. I'm pretty sure, even Soochul had to go through some…phases"

"Right", I said cupping my hand around my coffee. "He didn't even have time to be with me sometimes. Always one thing or another".

"Exactly", He agreed, "Trust me being a prince is more troublesome than being an emperor. I had to do everything for my dad. I mean, Hoseok. Command the army, get rid of annoying ministers, travel to villages whenever there was a flood or something, keep track of the shadow guards".

"Shadow guards?" I inquired, "Are those the ones-"

"Who attacked your kingdom", He finished, "Yes, they used to be under my command. I should've known something was wrong when he suddenly decided to take them under his control before our….wedding".

"So, he had been planning the attack for ages…..", Dan-Oh mused. 

"He had", Taeyang agreed, "He told me that with the marriage and all, I won't be able to handle so many responsibilities. I believed him".

He hasn't been lying, I thought. 

"You had no idea at all?" I asked.

"Mae, I swear on my life", He said, "I was more interested in the wedding and…you. I thought he was busy planning the events when he kept meetings till late night".

"All this time, I thought you were in this as well", I thought aloud.

"Hold up", Darcel intervened, "Mae, don't you think it was absurd of your dad to let your enemy into your kingdom? Like wasn't he suspicious at all?"

"That's the same thing I asked my brother", I said. "You don't happen to know his whereabouts do you?"

"I'm sorry Mae", Taeyang said, "I don't know where he is. But since he's older than all of us, he must've reincarnated earlier".

"Exactly" Darcel said, "Second question, what happened to the Mae's kingdom? Like after she died?"

"Um, about that", Taeyang said leaning against the table, "It's technically not ours and people won't suddenly agree to a new ruler. A rival, nonetheless. So when I died, it was still in the revolting stage".

"I hope he didn't hurt the people", I said. 

I remembered the nice girl who used to bring me food when I used to train in that abandoned yard. And the other girl who sold osmanthus cakes by the street. 

Taeyang bit his lower lip, "I think Hoseok had to threaten some to keep them calm".

Threaten? I thought, More like kill their family members and abduct the kids and women. 

"I'm glad I didn't live to see that", I said. 

"I can't take this anymore", Nyx claimed, "I can't breathe and I'm dying. You guys talk it out and fill me with the details because I'm out of here!"

"Ok babe", Darcel raised her hands like, not my fault. "I think all of us could use some air".

"Yeah, I'm sensing you two need some space", Dan-Oh said, getting up with difficulty. 

"Ok guys", I said, sliding out for the others to pass. "Thank you for coming…. It was helpful".

"No problem Mae", Chloe gave me a hug, "We'll see you later? Wanna grab dinner together?"

"Yeah, sure".

"See you later princess", Dan-Oh winked, "You two, have a nice talk and sought it all out". She made a Korean heart and left the restaurant with another hinting wink. 

I sighed, Once a maid, always a maid. 

"Even now I don't have any friends you know", Taeyang said smiling, "You're lucky to have such caring friends Mae. My life is not so different from the past….. Only now I have someone else to take care of as well".

"You have a kid?!" I gasped. 

"What?!", He flinched, "No….I have a little brother".

Ha, kidding I thought, This guy has no sense of sarcasm.

"Pfft", I laughed. "You should've seen the look on your face. A kid? At your age? Ha!"

He didn't join my laugh. Instead he stared at me with a starstruck expression on his face. 

I cleared my throat, "So um it's nice to hear that you have a little brother but…. you weren't very clear about the reason why you died".

"Ah!", He came out of his trance, "About that…. I told you, it was just suicide".

"How?"

"Well it's like this…", He fidgeted. "I was wasting myself on wine and suddenly I felt like not living anymore. I took an overdose and um….died".

"I see", I said.

But even as I said those words I felt like the princely burdens weren't the only things that drove him off the edge. I remembered very clearly the shock and pain he had in his face the moment I slashed my neck. 

"That wasn't it was it?" I asked quietly, "Was it because of me?"

He looked  at me stunned for a few moments. 

It was all because of you, He thought silently, I just didn't want to accept the fact that you weren't in that lifetime with me anymore. 

He remembered grabbing the anklet off her bloody feet when the guards carried off her body. He remembered having it inside his robes everytime he left his chambers. He remembered holding onto it when he was drunk and wasted. And finally…..he remembered in his haze….the way he clutched onto it at the final moments of his life. Gasping and holding on as if it would help him reincarnate and meet her all over again. 

But wasn't that worth it? He thought, looking at the girl in front of him. Wasn't there another chance to redeem himself? I killed myself on a mere whim but who'd have thought…

"Yes Mae", He said with a bittersweet smile. "I just didn't want to live another day without you. Did you think I'd want to live after all that? After watching you die right in front of my eyes while I just stood there with no way to help you?".

I blushed a deep shade of red, that was not what I expected. 

"I-I see", I said, brushing a strand of hair behind my ear. "But I want you to know that I don't blame you. After listening to you, I don't think I can blame you anymore. So…don't feel bad about it".

"I don't know what to say to Min Joon", He continued, "I'm pretty sure he hates me to the core and I don't blame him. After all, I barged into your relationship…."

I jolted, your relationship. 

"Yeah", I said, "I'm pretty sure he still feels that way".

"Still?" He asked pushing away his teacup, "It's not like you'll are dating now right?"

"No we're not!" I said suddenly before I could stop myself.

"I see", He smirked slightly.

Please button up your shirt, I prayed silently averting my gaze. 

"Anyways", I said. "I'm glad you've told me the truth. I was pretty confused about everything you know…."

"I'm glad too", He said.

"Um, so I have to go meet up with my friends…. Nice meeting you….?"

He smiled, "Nice to meet you too Mae".

I got up and hurried out while he stood up and dusted himself. 

Just as I opened the door a blast of cold air greeted me.

"Mae?" He called. 

I looked back, "Hm?"

"I'm always here", He said, "If you ever need me, I'll always be there for you".

I smiled, "I know". 

With that, I hurried into the street and out of sight. 

Mountains grow tall, rivers run far. As long as you're here, so am I.  1

"There's plenty of time", He said to himself, "I'm not losing you again".