Chapter 7.2: The Fragility of Connection

I sat in the cafeteria, picking at my food, my gaze drifting over to the familiar group of friends sitting across the table. Yuto was animatedly talking about his latest gaming achievements, Aki was arguing with him about strategy, and Miyu was listening with that half-smile of hers, the one that made it clear she wasn't paying full attention but wasn't entirely ignoring him, either. It all felt so normal. So easy. But I couldn't bring myself to join in.

They were all talking, laughing, living in a world that I couldn't quite reach anymore. They didn't see the cracks, the dark corners where I spent most of my time. And I didn't want them to.

It wasn't that I didn't care about them—I did. I cared deeply. But they didn't see me. Not really.

That's when I saw her.

Haruka was sitting at the other side of the cafeteria, alone, reading a book. She was the only one who didn't seem to mind the quiet. And when she glanced up, her eyes met mine for a brief moment. Just a flicker of recognition, but enough to make my heart skip a beat.

I didn't know what came over me. I just stood up, without thinking, and walked toward her.

"Hey," I said, my voice sounding strange, even to me.

Haruka looked up from her book, surprised, but not startled. There was something about her presence that made everything seem more… grounded. More real.

"Hey, Kai," she said, closing the book with a soft thud. "You alright?"

I hesitated, unsure of how to answer. Should I say I was fine? Should I say something vague, like I always did? Or should I tell her the truth?

Instead, I said, "Can I sit with you?"

She smiled softly, gesturing to the empty seat across from her. "Of course."

I sat down, the silence between us filling the space like a heavy blanket. It wasn't uncomfortable, though. It was the kind of quiet that felt safe, like the air between us was somehow… protected.

For a few moments, we didn't speak. Haruka picked up her book again, but it wasn't like before. There was something different about the way she held it now, like she was waiting for me to say something. Or maybe she wasn't waiting. Maybe she just knew I needed time.

Finally, I broke the silence. "I've been thinking about what you said the other day."

Her eyes met mine again, and there was that same, quiet understanding in her gaze. "Yeah?"

"About how it's okay not to have everything figured out," I said, the words slipping out of me before I could stop them. "I think I understand now. But… I'm scared. I'm scared that if I don't figure it out soon, it'll be too late."

Haruka closed her book and leaned back in her chair, her eyes thoughtful. "It's okay to be scared. But you don't have to do it alone. You don't have to have everything figured out right now. No one expects you to."

I swallowed, feeling a tightness in my chest. "But what if I don't know how to change? What if I can't?"

She smiled then, and it wasn't one of those fake, forced smiles. It was the kind of smile that made me believe she wasn't just saying the right words, but that she truly understood. "You don't have to change all at once. It's okay to take small steps. And when you're ready, I'll be here."

For some reason, those words felt like a weight had been lifted. Not because I had figured everything out, but because, for the first time, I felt like I wasn't carrying it all alone.