[135] Crazy Plans

Chapter 135: Crazy Plans

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Hashirama flew back to Green Bit, it was safe from the angry people of Dressrosa as they couldn't fly, and the chance was low that they'd take the half-broken bridge that connected Dressrosa to Green Bit.

There were super tall trees and fungus on this island, and they were bigger now after Hashirama fixed them. He decided to land on top of one of the largest mushrooms that touched the clouds, dropping on the smooth surface of its purple head and sitting down.

Tsunade landed and sat beside him. "So tell me about your crew," she started suddenly. "They seem like an interesting bunch. Also, how did you fool Vice-Admiral Tsuru with Robin's death?"

Hashirama slowly turned to her, realizing that she had recognized Robin. Robin from back then, tanned from the heat of Alabasta, wearing a cowboy hat, was different from the Robin now. Her skin tone was different, and so was her hairstyle; her entire getup itself was of another style. While she rocked a modern sassy spy vibe before, she looked like an elegant lady now. 

So Hashirama was surprised that Tsunade recognized the archeologist, even though they had never met before.

"...I used a Wood Clone." He shrugged and explained, turning back to look at the sky as the clouds layered beyond his gaze.

Hashirama told her the story of how Robin begged him to hand her over to the Marines, and he handed over a Wood-clone instead which was using the Transformation Jutsu to pretend to be Robin. He told Tsunade how Robin made a stupid decision and fled Alabasta without him, taking his money, and then returned three years later.

He told him about how he kidnapped Vivi, how he tied her up when she realized what he was planning to do, and set out to the sea. Then the Mikita rescue episodes, after which the crew went to East Blue to recruit Nami. Then a little detour to Amazon Lily, and finally, here in Dressrosa.

"Not bad for a journey," Tsunade said. She paused for a moment then, hesitating and then sitting closer. She put her right arm around his shoulder and then gently pulled him down to put his head on her lap. "Looks like you've been doing well for the past few years. When did this womanizing episode begin, though?"

"Er- After Robin left. Felt a little annoyed, and decided to release some desires. In no time, I was sleeping with girls from around the capital city, the maids of the castle, and then some more. It's addicting, you know?" He shrugged, while she put a hand on his cheek, gently holding his face and smiling down at him. "You and I already agreed that I'd have multiple lovers, starting with Vivi. So I didn't hold back much after sailing."

"I did hold back a little though," he added. "Otherwise I'd have Robin and Nami on my bed already, too. Oh, and Hancock. That girl is cute."

"Hancock's a woman, not a girl," Tsunade remembered the impression she had of her new friend and said. "I am surprised you managed to win her heart."

"She's a little girl at heart, that's why." He said. "Err, not that I'm proficient in winning little girls' hearts. She's cute."

"Oh-ho?" Tsunade laughed and pinched his cheek as if he was a baby. "So my Shira can charm women well? Look how much you've grown up."

He gave her a dry look. "What a surprise."

"Shut up," she pinched his nose, making him stare up at her with a smile. "I… really missed you. I'm sorry I'm late."

"You are forgiven," He pretended to sound like a wise hermit as he said that, making her scoff in amusement.

"What are you gonna do about the girls? They looked mad." Tsunade finally returned to the important topic.

"I'll deal with them later," Hashirama said, evasively.

"That's not very practical. This looks like it has happened before. You need to manage your girls well if you want to keep them to yourself." She replied. "Our grandfather had just one wife, but many other clan members had multiple. Most of the marriages were in-clan marriages, and as multiple wives were allowed there were not many issues with it, the girls were fine with it. But for these girls who have grown up in different environments, it is a wonder how they are willing to share with you at all-"

"I am good at bed."

"…But unless you manage them well, they might not stay."

"What plan do you suggest?" Hashirama was aware that her point had value in it, he had a few ideas of his own. But he was curious what his sister was thinking.

"Mhm, try to build a good relationship between them like a pair. Currently, you only have Vivi and Mikita, right? Try to make them into a pair. Pair, as in, try to make them become friends, best friends." She smirked. "Try threesome with these pair girls. They'll get closer, and there will be less infighting. Later, when you have more girls, more pairs, if a girl from let's say pair-1 had a fight with a girl from pair-2, the chance is low that the other girl of pair-1 will fight the other girl of pair-2. So these two girls would help calm the first two girls. So it's a self-sustaining cycle."

"Oh," Hashirama looked up at her. That sounded smart. Fantastic. It sounded hard, but there was logic in it. "Good plan. But I don't think it's smart to include Mikita and Vivi together. Vivi is kind of strong-headed, so she isn't close to any girl in particular other than Robin. While Mikita is close to both Robin and Nami."

"Oh?" Tsunade hummed, smiling. "Robin sounds like the caretaker of the crew, how nice. I am glad she's not as the rumors say she is. Hmm, in that case…"

She went silent for a moment and then snapped her fingers. "I know. From what you told me, Mikita and Nami share similar hobbies, they are greedy girls. Orange and Tangerine. It'll be a crime to pair them with someone else. So you need to pair Vivi with Robin, the latter's maturity should keep the former's slightly spoiled childishness in check. Though that means you'll need to conquer Robin and Nami first. Nami is already halfway through, from what I saw earlier. You were kissing her, right? So you need to try harder for Robin."

"Alright," Hashirama turned around on his lap and faced her belly, burying his face there. "How do you think I should deal with the immediate situation, though? I think you understand that I can't just seduce Robin overnight."

She laughed, running her hand through his hair. "The same logic applies here too. The main problem isn't Vivi and Mikita here, it's the Princess and her aunt. Mikita didn't even attack you, it was just Vivi. I can handle her and make her calm down. You just need to use that chance to bag the princess and her aunt. Together. Tonight."

"...." He turned back to look at her eyes. "Sis, I know I bragged about my charm a little, but I don't think I can bed two women who are trying to kill me."

 Tsunade scoffed. "Who said you can't? Also, Rebecca didn't try to kill you. You fled fast so you didn't notice, but she was trying to stop Viola. I don't think she minds it very much that you're the way you are."

"...Oh well, she was a broken girl who had forgotten her father's memories back when we were interacting." He nodded to himself. "She's young and her situation was dirty. As the person who saved her from her, maybe her crush on me was deeper than I thought. Still, Viola is a mature woman, she-"

"She loves you," Tsunade reminded him and her eyes went cold. "She took out that knife exactly because she loves you, she felt betrayed. If she didn't love you, if she was a random woman, I would have shattered her skull right there."

"...How scary."

"I'm just protecting what's mine," Tsunade leaned down to place a kiss on his forehead. "Just because I'm telling you how to keep a harem doesn't mean I'm letting you go. You are… mine. Even if I did some foolish stuff, that won't change."

"So possessive of you." He looked at her with a smile. How much did it hurt her to give him tips on how to fuck more women, when she was in so much love with him? Women truly were wonderpus creatures.

Tsunade shrugged and returned to the topic. "There. I told you the theoretical plan. The practical plan is up to you; think about how you would seduce the two of them tonight. It's not my forte, so use your brain."

Hashirama stared at her. There was another problem, that being Kyros and Riku, but if their daughters accepted him, they would be forced to. So the solution to everything was to get Viola and Rebecca on the bed.

"Hmmm," Hashirama hummed and then got up. "I have a plan. I need to be discreet about it though. And that's going to be hard given Viola can see the entire country with her power. That means instead of the usual way to discreet yourself — stealth — I need to do the reverse. Multi Wood Clone Jutsu."

Hashirama clasped his hands, and then a few dozen clones crept out of his shadow. In a flutter of wings, everyone covered themselves in an interconnected huge dome of wings, changing positions inside, and then Hashiramas flew off into the sky one after another. The original was unrecognizable.

"So," one of the clones stopped to tell her.

"You can return now," another one said.

"I'll try to see how this goes. Let's meet in the morning." That was the last one before all of them spread around the sky and into all corners of Dressrosa. 

Now Viola didn't know where he truly was, so being on the lookout for him through her power would be useless. That'll give him the chance to invade wherever Rebecca will be staying at night, without Viola there to stop him.

Of the aunt and niece pair, he was going after the niece first. She was a gullible girl who had already fallen for him, after all.

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