Ruby Makes Cookies

Trenzalore...

"You're back!" Mami said, running up to Sayaka and Kyoko for a group hug.

"The hell happened?" Kyoko asked.

"I don't know. But this felt like our story." Sayaka said, rubbing the back of our head.

"Puella Magi Madoka Magica?" Mami asked. "How?"

"From beginning to end."

"Oh. You're right. It does." Kyoko said, her eyes widening.

"It was an unprovoked and violent attack, but that's no excuse." Strax said.

"We're all restored. That's all that matters now." Vastra said.

"We are not all restored." Jared said, looking at the time stream.

"You can't go in there. It's your own time stream and the Doctor's time stream, for God's sake." River said.

"I have to get her back."

"Of course, but not like this."

"But how?" Jenny asked.

"Is it possible?" Asuna asked.

"Is she still alive? It killed Doctor Simeon." Kirito said.

"Clara's got one advantage over the Great Intelligence." Jared said, grabbing the Doctor's hand.

"Which is?" Vastra asked.

"Me and the Doctor."

"Doctor, Jared, please listen to me. At least hear me." River said.

"Now, if we don't come back, and we might not..." The Doctor said.

"Doctor! Jared!"

"Go to the Tardis. The fast return protocols should be on. She'll take the SAO Survivors and the Three Magical Girls home first, the Paternoster Gang next, and then shut herself down."

"There has to be another way. Use the Tardis, use something. Save her, yes, but for God's sake be sensible." River said, while her image goes to hit the Doctor, and he catches her arm in his hand. "How are you even doing that? I'm not really here."

"River, you are always here to us. We always listen to you, the Doctor and I. We can always hear you, Melody Pond." Jared said, squeezing the Doctor's hand.

"Then why didn't one of you speak to me?" River asked.

"Because we thought it would hurt too much."

"I believe I could have coped."

"No, we thought it would hurt us. And we were right." The Doctor said.

Jared let's go of the Doctor's hand.

The Doctor kisses River, "Since nobody else in this room can see you, God knows how that looked. There is a time to live and a time to sleep. You are an echo, River. Like Clara. Like Team RWBY. Like all of us, in the end."

"River, you dying in the Library. It was the Doctor's fault for being so reckless. But it was essentially my fault since I had the foreknowledge. I know that I was afraid to change anything. But, River, you should've faded by now." Jared said, frowning.

"It's hard to leave when the two of you haven't said goodbye." River said, sadly.

"Then tell us, because we don't know. How do we say it?" The Doctor asked.

"There's only one way I'd accept. If you both ever loved me, say it like you're going to come back."

"Well, then. See you around, Professor River Song."

"See ya, River. Thanks for everything that has happened today. I will love you, always. My best friend. Might see you again at some point. I don't know." Jared said, happily.

"Till the next time, Doctor, Jared." River said.

"Don't wait up." The Doctor said.

"Oh, there's one more thing." River said.

"Isn't there always?" The Doctor asked.

"You always have something to tell us. So tell us." Jared said, smirking.

"I was mentally linked with Clara, Kirito, and Asuna. If Clara's really dead, and if Team RWBY are really dead, then how can I still be here?" River asked.

"Okay, how?" The Doctor asked.

"And is Team RWBY alive? Please tell me that they are." Jared said, smiling.

"Spoilers. Goodbye, sweetie, darling." River said, happily.

Melody Pond, daughter of the Tardis, vanishes.

"Team RWBY is still alive. Ruby Rose, Weiss Schnee, Blake Belladonna, and Yang Xiao Long are alive! Yes!" Jared said, excitedly. "That means if I can teleport my way into where Team RWBY is at. Using a vortex manipulator. Oh, my god. I could actually see them again!"

The Doctor and Jared step into their own time stream. Whiteout.

"I don't know where I am. I don't know where I'm going or where I've been. I was born to save the Doctor and Jared, but the Doctor and Jared are safe now. I'm the Impossible Girl, and my story is done." Clara said, her voice in Jared's head.

Jared managed to scoop up Clara from his time stream that has merged with the Doctor's. He managed to get a bit of hope from River Song saying that Team RWBY is still alive while also encountering the War Doctor which he will save for later.

The fanboy helped bring Clara, the Paternoster Gang, Sayaka, Kyoko, Mami, Kirito, and Asuna back home. He then typed in the coordinates on his vortex manipulator for Remnant. Jared disappeared in a flash of blue light from the Maitland Home in 2013 to head toward Remnant. But he doesn't know which one he ended up in until now.

In a space of pure whiteness, the giant blocky title and a certain rose emblem drop from the sky to the ground, where the four miniaturized members of Team RWBY pop out from behind it to smile, wave and adopt poses for the audience while an unseen speaker announces the show as: 'RWBY CHIBI'!

Team RWBY's dorm kitchen...

In a simple kitchen with stacked dishes next to the sink, a paper towel roll, a vase full of yellow flowers, and a large window showing beautiful blue skies dotted with fluffy clouds, the view zooms in briefly on the table containing a red bowl, a bag of flour, some eggs, and a package of "Choco Chippies" before Ruby Rose leaps up from behind and rubs her hands in excitement as she glances at the ingredients happily.

Jared Shay is playing on his Nintendo Switch with Splatoon 3 loaded up mostly because he's been waiting for that game for like forever. He is also feeling bad about losing his version of Team RWBY. He knows that he can get back to that version eventually, if he can pin down their coordinates somehow. But for now, he wants to hang out with the Chibi selves of his friends. Which he knows took place before the Fall of Beacon.

The fanboy looked over at the silver eyed girl to see her start her culinary quest by tapping one of the eggs on the side of the bowl, but the shell doesn't crack.

"Need some help?" Jared asked, looking at Ruby.

"I'm good!" Ruby said, looking perplexed for a moment, then tries rapidly hitting the egg with the same lack of results. "Don't worry about me!"

Scowling to herself, Ruby finally jumps up, screaming in rage, before throwing the egg into the bowl, where it finally splits open in a burst of white pieces and some orange yolk landing on her cheek, which she silently glowers at.

"Careful!" Jared said, looking up from his Nintendo Switch to focus on Ruby Rose again. "You're gonna hurt yourself."

Ruby then attempts to gently pour some of the flour into her bowl, but when none comes out, she gets up on the table itself and tips the whole bag over it upside-down.

"How did you do that?!" Jared exclaimed, his Nintendo Switch on his lap with Splatoon 3 still loaded up. "Let me help!"

Jared stood up and placed his Nintendo Switch back on the nearby table. Mostly because he wanted to help out one of his best friends.

"I don't need your help!" Ruby said, giving the bag a cautious shake, the flour bursts from the bag like a hose, causing Ruby to scream and Jared running up to the silver eyed girl to be obscured in powder before the dust clears to reveal piles of white around the kitchen and a pasty-faced Ruby with dizzy eyes.

"Ugh...." Jared said, looking over at Ruby and laughing a little. "Chocolate chip cookies aren't complete without chocolate chips."

"Right!" Ruby said, opening the bag of chocolate chips. "Are you just watching me or...."

"I want to watch you." Jared said, looking at the opened package of chocolate chips sitting alone next to the bowl until Ruby's fingers grab it from underneath and the silver eyed girl pops up, picking one solitary sweet out of the container and chomping down on it, only to pause with her hand in her mouth as she tastes it. "Want me to call Miku or Shirabe? Maybe Asuna or Hayate?"

"'Nah, I'm good." Ruby said, with her eyes darting from Jared to the bag, back and forth until she grins and starts digging in to the chocolate treats, grabbing handful after handful into her open mouth from behind the table, in front of it, and even outside the window. "Wow. You're like this with mints."

"Where's the mixer?" Jared asked, walking around the kitchen.

"I think it's somewhere..." Ruby said, navigating around the kitchen before she found the stirrer and plugging it in.

Jared opened a cupboard and tossed Ruby a spoon for her to stir the cookie dough for the chocolate chip cookies.

The next step shows Ruby going over to the bowl with the stirrer already in, and she attempts to move it only to find the spoon is stuck.

"How did you even manage to do that?" Jared asked.

"I don't know!" Ruby said, as she attempts to move it towards her with both hands while grunting, pulling on it from the tabletop with her feet planted on the bowl until she's launched back, pushing at it with all her might before pitching herself over the bowl, and finally jumping right onto the handle, all to no effect. She falls to the floor and looks up at the stubborn kitchen utensil with narrowed eyes. "Ow..."

With the spoon still in the bowl, Ruby is laying in the sink and tossing dozens of chips into her mouth from the bag with each shake, the pile of chocolate down her throat growing bigger and bigger until she decides to just dump the whole bag down, sending her into a frozen state with eyes widened and her foot twitching sporadically.

"Ruby!" Jared said, running up to Ruby to see that she ate more chocolate chips than she should have. "Are you okay?"

"Help me..." Ruby said, as Jared lifted her off the ground.

Jared walked over to the fridge to get a carton of milk out of it. He then walked over to the sink to grab a fresh glass. The ally of justice poured the milk into the glass before placing it on the kitchen island.

Finally, a lone glass of milk sits on the table, and Ruby looks up at it from the floor until she jumps up with a big smile to shove her newly-baked cookie in... only for the treat to not fit in the tiny glass rim.

"Thank you!" Ruby said, trying to jam her cookie in, but no matter how hard she hits it, her hard-earned delicacy doesn't touch the drink, causing her to moan in despair and collapse back on the ground. "Why did I not listen to you?"

"Because you didn't want to, Little Red..." Jared said, letting out a sigh. "Why?"

A second passes, and then the entire glass falls over and crashes on a surprised Ruby.

After a transition of pink flower petals flowing in and Ruby slicing the screen with a small Crescent Rose, the scene opens to the picture of a donkey nailed to the wall with a target marked where its tail should be. Amid the flurry of voices in the background, a sudden whooshing noise is heard as a blindfolded Weiss Schnee is launched from off-screen, landing with Myrtenaster like a dart embedding the donkey's tail... at its feet.

Team RWBY's living room...

"Missed!" Ruby said, looking at Weiss with her hand on top of Jared's.

"You were a few centimeters off, Ice Queen!" Jared said, laughing a little.

"Drat!" Weiss said, slouching down, still hanging off her sword.

Team RWBY's dorm room...

When another flurry of petals shows Ruby twirling her scythe happily, the next shot shows the dorm room of RWBY from the angle of Blake Belladonna's bed as Ruby skips down the hallway until she looks into the room.

"Huh, no one's here. Eh, I guess I'll go check the court...yard..." Ruby said, shrugging to herself.

Jared used his Semblance to reveal himself to Ruby after being invisible for a bit. He has been reading Blake's book and hoping for Ruby to appear at some point. Mostly because he has been bored all afternoon and not happy with what he saw in Blake's book.

"Ruby, want to go to the courtyard? Or do you want to read this?" Jared asked, sitting on Blake's bed.

Jared stood up from where he was sitting and headed towards the silver eyed girl wearing a red hood.

"Courtyard." Ruby said, and before she leaves, her gaze falls on the book half-hidden under Blake's pillow, with the title 'Ninjas of Love' (written by Patty Berdioler) on its spine. "Want to read it together?"

"Sure." Jared said, as he and Ruby fully stepped inside the room and zoomed over to their teammate's bedside. "Go on, open it. I only read halfway. I want to know what's at the end. I do hate endings after all."

"Okay." Ruby said, while there is a look of wonder on her face as she sneakily glances around making sure the coast is clear before taking it out and examining it herself. "How much have you read?"

"Um, like I said. Halfway."

Ruby stares at the cover picture of a man and woman dressed in black, armed with blades and looking deeply into each other's eyes under a tagline reading 'No shadows can conceal the lust of one enigma for long...', until she turns it around to read the description.

"Ninjas, huh?" Ruby asked, intrigued. "Together?"

"Yeah. Together or not all." Jared said, smirking.

With a quick shot of Blake swinging away on her Gambol Shroud amid a rush of gray smoke, we see Ruby flipping through the pages of her new discovery with Jared, the two with their eyes wide and absorbing information with emotions ranging from amazed marvel, intense concentration, gasping shock, guilty pleasure, shuddering glee.

"Ruby, want to skip ahead?" Jared asked, looking at Ruby.

"Like you do with reading fan fiction?" Ruby asked.

"Yeah."

"Okay." Ruby said, as she topped it all off with her skipping ahead a few pages until she turns the book sideways and a picture unfolds downward for a full body shot. "Look at this!"

"No way!"

"Now that's a katana!" Ruby said, eyeing the imagery from top to bottom with a wide grin as she gestures to the lower part. "Did you see this part?"

"Nope! Belle does have great taste. That katana is wonderful." Jared said, smiling.

Beacon Academy courtyard...

"Um, how long is this fight supposed to last?" Shirabe asked.

"I don't know!" Kirika said, looking at Shirabe.

After Yang Xiao Long jumps into frame on a cloud of orange and jumps back out with a blast from her Ember Celica, Weiss is in the Beacon Academy courtyard raising her weapon threateningly at Yang with a snarl, and the blonde in turn raises her arms with a smirk. They get into their battle-ready stances before coming at one another, Weiss swiping her blade at a ducking Yang, whose hair curl pops back up once the attack is safely over.

"Those two aren't going all out." Tsubasa said, looking between Weiss and Yang.

"Why should they?" Maria asked. "Let them have a bit of fun."

"Fair point."

Noticing the near-blow to her locks, Yang attempts a punch on Weiss, who blocks it with a small glyph before swinging her sword down onto one of her opponent's gauntlets. Yang uses this opportunity to smack the blade away from its wielder and leave her open to a leap in the air followed by a blast from her weapons... only for the shot to never fire and result in only a "click" noise.

Yang lands back on the ground and keeps trying to punch her weapons into shooting, and Weiss stops flinching from what she thought was an oncoming blow to look just as puzzled at Yang. She smiles and laughs to herself, raising her hands to her face with tongue stuck out mockingly at the brawler until Yang realizes the obvious solution and simply punches Weiss with her fist, knocking the heiress out of the screen and letting Yang strike a victorious stance.

Team RWBY's dorm room...

When Blake deftly twirls and rolls in with another transition before jumping out of the scene, the real deal is seen at her bed looking frantically for a certain something. When she can't find it, she gives a worried look to the audience before scrambling through her bookshelf.

"Where is it?!" Blake exclaimed, as she got up and turned left with an embarrassed face to Ruby and Jared standing there with 'Ninjas of Love' in the silver girl's arm and growling grimaces, hesitantly pointing at the novel. "Ruby, Jared, is that my book?"

"This is filth! Fiiiilth!" Ruby said, pointing accusingly at the tome in question.

"How could you?! This is worse than Nekopara!" Jared said, looking at Blake with his arms crossed. "I thought Finana playing that game live was bad. But what happened in that book! Why?!"

With a sudden twirl, Ruby smacks Blake across the floor into her bed using her own sordid literature before marching away with Jared to the other side of the room.

"Let's read this somewhere else, Little Red." Jared said, sadly.

"Can...can I have my book back?" Blake asked, as her eyes were still dizzy and legs twitching while raising one arm.

"Later!" Ruby said, popping back in angrily.

"What she said!" Jared said, popping back in angrily too.

Ruby and Jared disappear again as Blake fully collapses, right as the screen cuts to a television test pattern of red, white, black, and yellow before the credits start rolling.