Nonsense

"'Shall we try making contact with the local soldiers a bit further ahead?'" Roman suggests.

"Hmm, what will you do, Master? I recommend talking to the locals at the destination as it's one of the joys of traveling," I adds.

"Understood. Alright then,"

'Cough,' Roman clears his throat.

"'Slow down a bit! Please! Both of you can't talk right now!'" Roman pleads with teary eyes.

"Ugh, even though we're just getting started... Well, can't be helped. It wouldn't feel right to kick up stones and leave a bad taste."

Easing off the accelerator, I deploy the parachute and gradually reduce speed.

Eventually, we come to a stop and I help both of them off.

My heart is still racing. Could bikes really be such amazing rides? I'll take good care of you, Gil Gil Machine.

"Did you enjoy that? This is my version of a king's march. Consider it an honor."

"Yes, it was amazing! The wind hitting my body so hard... It felt so good!"

"My butt's split..."

"Don't worry, you were already like that, Ritsuka."

"Not about that!"

"Fuhahaha, we'll be traveling like this for the most part. I am the joyful king, after all! Alright, let's try making contact with the local villagers."

"Are you sure it's okay?"

Master seems to be worried about not having learned French or any other languages. Of course, I can't speak either. I don't even know which country I was in, and that's equally unclear, so I'm of no use.

"Sorry, I'll study once we get back."

"Oh, come on!"

"Why, the language barrier is part of the charm of a journey. Don't worry about it. Even among different species, communication is possible. Express things through expressions, gestures, and spirits. That's what communication is about."

Express things through spirits...

My words have an unshakable self-assurance. Travelers are not just Mash and the Master.

"For smooth interactions, you need social skills. But I'll tell you this, I only have one friend. After all, I never bend myself. If I don't bend, I can't make friends. Fuhahaha."

"You must have struggled, my only friend."

"...Understood, Senpai. Leave this to me."

"Mash?"

"Mash Kyrielight! I volunteer as Chaldea's Ambassador of Goodwill!"

"'You've got some determination. Words hold power. They're basically the pitiable leaves that get trampled on, too, you know. Cat is pitiable.'"

"'A fool who talks and stops moving is easier to cut down. Anyway, good luck!'"

"Yes!"

"Alright, go ahead, Ambassador of Goodwill. Don't throw a tantrum like Marie did earlier and claim you're not at fault or anything."

"'Gil!'"

"Hahaha, let it slide with a smile. It's a stylish sense of humor."

They've already become quite familiar with each other. The lively conversation is pleasant.

"Alright, let's go!"

Mash approaches the soldiers with determination. Impressive, show 'em what you're made of, Mash.

"I wonder if she'll be okay..."

...

"..."

"Hey."

"!?"

"Excuse me. We're not suspicious. Let's talk. From the edge of the observatory to you..."

"There are some weirdos here!!"

To cut to the conclusion, we were quickly surrounded.

"I'm sorry! I messed up!"

"Idiot, Mash!"

"It should be 'Hello?' or 'Nice to meet you?'... Inexperienced ones..."

"'France! This is France!'"

The soldiers, though frightened, are in a defensive position. They seem exhausted, as if they've been in some kind of battle.

"Doctor! Is there any way to defuse this situation? Please teach us the art of communication!"

"'What do I know? I'm a loner! How about trying a clever joke? Like, 'This hat is German!''"

"'Roman, be quiet.'"

"'Sorry, Director!'"

"Well then, what should we do about the hostility? Should we just eliminate them?"

They may not be Servants, but local people. It would be easy to wipe them all out...

-- I'd rather avoid killing if possible. I'm not prepared to take the lives of living humans...

There's something like a brilliance in life... It feels 'precious' to casually take it away.

"'Singularity is a disconnected world, killing won't cause paradoxes... But...'"

"'Mash, Ritsuka. Prioritize neutralizing them. All you need to worry about is the fate of humanity. You don't need unnecessary burdens.'"

"Director..."

"'If combat is inevitable, fight defensively. It's a tough order, but at least your hands won't be stained with blood.'"

"'Did you hear that, King of Heroes? No killing!'"

"I understand. It's a good choice."

The path of the journey is determined. For some reason, I had a feeling like that.

This choice, it feels... precious.

"--In that case, let me handle this situation."

"Gil?"

He taking a step forward.

...I have a bad feeling about this. A really ridiculous feeling.

"I won't tolerate insolence directed at me. I am the passing King of Heroes, I will let most insults slide."

Addressing the soldiers.

"Even without words, there is a conveyed impact. Listen well, and lend your ears to the words of the king!"

Gulp...

"Senpai, stand behind me."

-- Let's assume the king is going to speak.

"--An assassin from some country became a hero. The leader of a pitiful cult called 'Mountain Old Man' became the representative of the Assassins."

"Is that Hassan? He was a clever rat repeating petty assassinations, and he did manage to make a name for himself through clever tricks, but he had a particular weakness he just couldn't overcome."

What Assassin is weak against...? Amazing, so there's something like that...!

"'Weakness...?'"

"Yes," the king nodded and continued.

"That would be... financial management. No matter how much he tried, the finances were a mess. With his incredibly poor skills, the Old Man of the Mountain household ended up bankrupt..."

He looked around with a determined expression.

"――Bankruptcy, only for Hassan."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

...

....

...

"--Embarrassing."

My face is burning. Don't look, please don't look at me.

Please don't look at me with such pitying eyes, as if you're looking at something pathetic--!!

"Fuhahahaha! Bankruptcy, all thanks to Hassan! Do you get it? It's the ultimate joke, staking bankruptcy on Hassan! The title of the most unfortunate Servant goes to Hassan. Giving him the role of a laughingstock is a form of offering! Hahahaha!"

"...Let's go back."

"Yeah, fighting is so meaningless..."

The soldiers put away their weapons and retreated, crestfallen.

"...We managed to neutralize the situation."

"Yeah, we should at least try to follow them... We might find out something."

"Please do that..."

"God is cruel..."

Everyone's spirits are down. The soldiers have left.

"Heh, even in jokes, I'm invincible! My flawlessness is terrifying! Bankruptcy, all thanks to Hasan...! Hahaha!"

-- I should probably stop this joke before I die. In his own way, The nameless soul had made a renewed determination.

***

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