An Extra's Struggle
***** This novel is long gone Don't bother reading this I'm sorry I wasn't able to continue ***** Girls that come clinging from every trope, comic misunderstandings and hot sword master mommies... ... That's what Damien got ... He's the hero, the omnipotent being that can do whatever he likes ! ... The story will resolve around him and his epic fights ! ... ... This above is the synopsis of the novel our Main Character was reading before he killed himself... ... Truth to be told... He was pathetic his whole life.... Being the garbage of society... ... However... He got a second chance ! Ethan... He could try to be the hero, now having the same powers as Damien ! ... And yet... It seems the world... Had determined a different fate for him... ... Ethan... From the start... He was just meant to be an Extra... ... One who struggles... And gets forgotten... ... ... But What If.... He doesn't give up ?
Memories of the past
[ Plot armor ? ]
Don't worry about it...
Just a mistake of mine...
...
Sigh
...
Will we really be stuck 'here' for a whole month ?
[ Yes ]
[ As I have already told you ]
It's so shitty...
[ Just remember, it is entirely ( your ) fault if your thoughts are full of garbage ]
...
[ "Wait... Aren't you technically talking about me... ?" ]
...
Don't say that !
Aveline is not garbage !
...
[ Unfortunately.... I'm not talking about her.... ]
[ Right now... If you look around... There's not even a thought about Miss. Aveline... ]
...
What are you even saying ?
I'm sure they are h...e...r....e
...
There's really nothing...
...
[ I'm talking about ]
[ Those ]
...
[ "Always thinking about me...." ]
[ "You're quite good at flattering...." ]
...
What do you mean ?
...
[ Well... I don't need eyes to see what's lurking here... ]
...
[ Your fear and your insecurities ] I don't have any, at all.
[ Your suicidal thoughts ] There are none
[ Your worst nightmares ] You're imagining things...
[ I can feel them around you ]
Well, that's probably your imagination.... I'm at my best right now....
...
[ Sigh... ]
[ I know they're not actually yours.. ]
...
[ I'm not even talking to you anymore... ]
...
[ "That's right !" ]
...
[ Ethan... You should sleep for a bit ]
...
Smack
...
[ Why did you do that ? ]
...
[ "Do what ?" ]
...
[ Why do you want to control Ethan ? ]
...
[ "Who knows ?..." ]
[ "Ehehe... "]
...
[ "Oh... Wait... You DO realize you're also a puppet right ? ]
...
[ Pff... ]
[ I'm Rahu... The god of Darkness... ]
[ Something I have created can't control me ]
...
[ "Yeah !... That's pretty obvious !" ]
...
[ "Then..." ]
[ "Why didn't you cancel the memory spell ?" ]
...
[ Well... Because... ]
...
[ "From the start, this was your(our) magic... ]
[ "It's normal to be able to modify or erase it...." ]
...
[ "You know..." ]
[ "Ethan really trusted you" ]
...
[ "Wait..." ]
[ "Did you ACTUALLY want me to devour him so much !" ]
...
[ "Does this mean... That we're finally buddies.... AGAIN" ]
...
[ We're N..O..Yeah ! ]
...
[ "See ? I told you..." ]
[ "If you think about it... Didn't you act a bit weird back then..." ]
...
[ "You were so enraged..." ]
[ "No... WE were enraged.." ]
[ "After all... I'm you ? ]
...
[ Y...O...U... A...R....E... N...O....T... ]
...
[ "Just stop resisting !" ]
[ "Why don't you just...." ]
[ "No.. I'm sure it wouldn't work..." ]
...
[ "You know what..." ]
[ "Let's just dispose of anyone who's useless !" ]
...
[ "Hmm..." ]
[ "All right ! " ]
...
[ "First of all..."
[ "You kill Ethan..." ]
[ "Actually... You should first crash all of his hopes... And then... Yeah... You can pretty much make him despair so much he'll want to commit suicide again..." ]
[ "What's next... ?" ]
[ "Oh... How could I forget about Miss. Aveline..." ]
...
[ "GRIN" ]
[ "Give her to someone who could share some 'love' with her" ]
...
[ "Not Ethan's fake love... Something much more carnal.." ]
...
[ Grit.. Grit...Grit... ]
...
[ "Whoops !" ]
...
[ GritGritGritGritGrit ]
...
[ "Did I remind you of that other bitc-[ DO NOT CROSS THE LINE ]
...
[ "How did you...? Well.. I'm still the one in-[ ???? ]
...
[ You... Are MY creation... ]
...
[ Didn't you say so yourself ? ]
[ Magic can BE erased... ]
...
[ And so.... CAN you... ]
...
[ DO not... Misunderstand my kindness.... ]
[ Because If you try to order to me such bullshit again... ]
...
[ I'M GOING TO KILL YOU ]
...
[ Got that ? ]
...
[ "I..It's not like you can actually..." ]
...
[ Sigh... ]
[ I've been too lenient with you... ]
...
[ ????... I created you because I was scared of... ]
[ TIME ]
...
[ That's why... Since you were given life from MY power... ]
[ You CAN'T handle loneliness... ]
...
[ You're always looking for attention... ]
[ You're just a DOG ]
...
[ So... How old was Ethan ? ]
[ 25 ?... Let's see... A round trip would be about.... 50 years ? ]
...
[ I wanted to know about his past life anyway... ]
[ Maybe I'll even understand how he knows so much about this world... ]
...
[ Well... ]
...
[ Rewind ]
...
[ "What ?" ]
[ "Your great plan was just watching Ethan memories in reverse ?" ]
...
[ "Do you truly think It will do anything ?" ]
...
[ I don't know... Why don't we try ? ]
...
[ Also... ]
[ If you utter even a single word... ]
...
[ You'll be completely erased from existence ]
[ Smile ]
...
...
[ Finally... A bit of silence... ]
...
[ Phew... ]
[ Should I write some kind of diary ? ]
[ I think It would help... ]
...
[ Well... Let's hear what Ethan's life was all about... ]
...
...
[ One year in ]
...
[ To be honest... I think Ethan talked less than 20 times... ]
[ On top of that... In those occasions... He just expresses his will to die... ]
...
[ He doesn't go out of his room... So... I still don't get much of this world society ]
...
[ For some reason... Karma blocks information here and there... ]
[ I don't think I'll be able to get the knowledge I want... ]
...
[ However... ]
[ It seems that he posses some kind of artifacts that don't require magic ]
...
[ Among them... This 'phone' is the one I hear the most about ]
[ Apparently it sends written text to other people ]
...
[ It's not like I can't do that with magic... ]
[ But the fact that I CAN do it without it... ]
...
[ Smile ]
[ It's really intriguing ! ]
...
[ Maybe I should spend time studying new things like this... ]
...
...
[ Three years in ]
...
[ Not much has changed... ]
[ I can just hear... Generally... More conversations... ]
[ But he's still stuck in his room ]
...
[ To understand everything... I need to use magic to put the letters in the right order.... ]
[ My mind is almost going in reverse... ]
...
[ And yet... Those sparkles of knowledge are really what return me to reality... ]
...
[ I can't fathom how much I still don't know ! ]
...
...
[ Five years in ]
...
[ He finally left his room ]
...
[ It seems he's going to... University ? ]
[ Translating every single word is taking a toll in my mind strength... ]
...
[ Still... I'm happy that Ethan is studying so much ]
[ He is learning... And so am I ]
[ Every time he goes to his lessons... It feels like I'm with him ]
...
[ Also... I finally understood all that grumble about Aveline being underage ! ]
[ How old is he ? ]
[ 20 ? ]
[ He isn't even considered an 'actual' adult, here ]
...
...
[ At least... ]
[ Right now... He is seemingly happy ]
...
...
[ However... ]
[ I don't understand... ]
[ I have already passed his shut-in phase ]
...
[ When did he get... So depressed... As he was... ( In the future ) ? ]
[ I didn't hear anything that could have made him like that... ]
...
...
[ Eight years in ]
...
[ Humans in this world are too complicated ]
[ I can't comprehend... I really can't ]
[ Is he really happy ? ]
...
[ I don't get it ! ]
...
[ Is there something I can't understand if I don't see what's happening ? ]
[ This damned sight... ]
...
...
[ Twelve years in ]
...
[ His brother killed himself ]
[ I'm sure he has Blamed himself all this time... ]
[ But Then... ]
[ Why did it take him nine years to become a shut-in... ]
...
[ I don't get it ! ]
...
[ ARGH ! ]
[ This is so frustrating ! ]
...
...
[ Even his 'joy' is fading ]
...
[ But I don't know why ! ]
...
...
( elttil a elims uoy t'nod yhW )
-Why don't you smile a little ?-
( ...I ...oN )
No... I...
( ! elims )
-Smile !-
...
[ Wait... What Did I just hear... ]
...
[ Yeah... His Smile... ]
[ Something I couldn't see... ]
[ Maybe... ]
...
...
[ Fifteen years in ]
...
[ His parents died during a fire ]
[ Like with your brother... You thought you were the one at fault... ]
...
[ Something you couldn't control... ]
...
[ Something you couldn't stop... ]
...
[ You're stupid, Ethan ]
[ You remind me of myself ]
...
[ Yeah... ]
[ The answer I so longed for was actually so simple... ]
...
[ Your smile... ]
[ From the start... It was a ]
[ Fake... ]
[ A deceive, nothing more than that ]
...
[ Who did you want to trick ? Others ? ]
[ No, Ethan, I know it was all meant for yourself ]
[ As time passed, your smile brightened, but your mental health... ]
[ It worsened... ]
...
[ And one day... ]
[ You grew tired of the show you had put on... ]
...
[ Ahaha... Ethan... ]
[ You're stronger than me ! ]
...
[ At the very least... You tried to be happy... ]
...
[ Instead... ]
[ I just accepted everything.... ]
[ I gave up so early... ]
[ I didn't have the will to resist.... ]
[ Yeah... I didn't....
[ Until you arrived here... ]
...
[ I should probably stop here... ]
[ I have already seen what I needed... ]
...
[ However... ]
[ I want to know about the parents you missed all your life... ]
[ I want to... Hear your real laugh... ]
[ I want you to be happy... Even if this is just a memory... ]
...
[ Geez... ]
[ You're really troubling me... ]
[ Wasn't I scared of time ? ]
[ And yet... I'm sacrificing another ten years for you... ]
...
...
[ Twenty years in ]
...
[ Your parents were good people, nothing like mine ]
....
[ I wish you could have just remained like you were right now ]
[ You had... ]
[ No suicidal thoughts ]
[ No depression ]
[ And... ]
[ A brother who cared for you ]
...
[ What about mine ? ]
[ It was just one full of TRAITORS... ]
...
[ ???? Is nowhere to be heard... ]
[ I guess those last five years... They're pretty useless... ]
...
[ It's time to return... ]
...
[ Rewind ]
...
...
[ ( Fifteen ) years in ]
...
[ Everything is in the right order.... ]
...
[ Now that I have so much spare time... And that I don't need to be alert for every single one of the things I hear... I might as well create blue prints of this artifacts... ]
[ I need to imagine how they could be... ]
[ Well... It'll be worth it... Ethan could sell them... ]
...
[ I'm also sure he'll be pretty happy to get something from his world... ]
...
...
[ ( Twelve ) years in ]
...
[ Your hardships... ]
[ They certainly hurt more now that I can hear everything directly... ]
...
[ I would shed a tear or two for you... If I still had eyes... ]
....
....
[ ( Eight ) years in ]
...
[ ARGH ! ]
[ Why can't I get the hang of this phone-device ]
...
[ Honestly... It's getting boring... ]
[ Sometimes... I feel the urge to speed things up... ]
[ But I remember It's punishment for ???? ]
...
[ Yeah... I know you're still here ]
[ "...." ]
...
...
[ "Grin" ]
...
...
[ ( Five ) years in ]
...
[ The knowledge of this university professors is really wide ]
[ I was able to finish my blueprint thanks to them ]
...
[ I guess... I'll relax for a bit from now on... ]
...
...
[ ( Three ) years in ]
...
[ I just wanted to be sure... But there was really nothing that particularly brought you to become a shut-in ]
...
[ It was just the result of a very long process... ]
...
[ Well... You don't have to worry... ]
[ Because... My FRIEND... You now have a god that will help you... ]
[ Whenever you want, Wherever you will be ]
...
-Tin-
...
[ I can feel... Karma ? ]
[ Why now of all times ? ]
...
[ Karma acquisition rate ]
[ Damien 99.6 % (-0.1%) ]
[ Ethan 0.4% (+0.1%) ]
...
[ Something that might be important... ]
...
[ No way... ]
[ Did I really rise his karma ? ]
...
[ Well... Trying a second time won't hurt me... ]
...
[ I'll help you Ethan, whenever you want, wherever you will be ]
...[ As expected nothing happened ]...
[ ...It would have been too easy... ]
...
...
[ ( One ) year in ]
...
[ I'm almost at the end... Ethan ]
...
[ Because I've prevented you from waking up through mana control for so long... I'm worried there might be some side effects... ]
...
[ We are in your imagination... So there really shouldn't be any problems... ]
[ Besides... You won't even notice anything... Time flows so slowly here... ]
...
[ That just about a day should have passed in the real word... ]
...
...
[ Zero years in... ]
...
[ And that's the end of my mana-diary ]
...
...
[ This forty years... They didn't even feel that long after all... ]
[ No... It might just be that my perception of time... as a God... Is a bit flawed... ]
...
[ "Grin" ]
...
[ Now... I'll finally 'release' you ]
...
Yawn
It really happened a second time...
Honestly...I.. feel strangely light.
You know... Just as if a very heavy weight had just been lifted off my hearth...
...
I'm loving this feeling !
...
Did you power up "Unyielding Mind?"
[ I just... Scared... An intruder... ]
...
Really ? I guess it won't happen anymore...
No...
I need to stay alert...
He might be lurking here somewhere...
[ Yeah... You should tell me if anything happens... ]
...
[ "I think I'm forgetting something..." ]
...
[ Oh, Right ]
[ I have a gift for you ! ]
...
[ I'll send it to you trough teleportation magic ]
...
I suddenly feel cheap for having used just an item box
I guess Darkness is better than light when talking about this !
Teleportation magic is much cooler.
By the way...
What is it?
[ The blueprint of a phone ! ]
How do you know about that ?
[ I'm a god, It's obvious that I'm knowledgeable ]
...
"You weren't so much... A few days ago..."
...
Anyway...
I was just wondering....
How am I gonna look at it ?
You know...
We still haven't returned to reality...
[ Ah ]
...
[ Plot armor acquisition rate ]
[ Damien 99.6% ]
[ Ethan 0.4% ]
Black_bird2
I'm happy that you like 'this' novel, but you're not obligated to send powerstones every day...
....
He'll be remembered forever !
...
Anyway...
...
WHAT'S WITH THE PACING... WHY HAS SO MANY THINGS ALREADY HAPPENED ?
( To some... This might not even be a good thing... :( )
...
DAMN... ETHAN wasn't exactly loved by life