webnovel
Art233
Art233Author10mth
2024-04-04 10:16

hi author here sorry for the shameless review buti hope you guys enjoy it and rate it for me and any feedback is appreciated thanks

Liked by 7 people

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Replies13
Kabuk5
Kabuk5Lv14

Personally, I'm unable to read the story since everything looks like a wall of text, maybe you should get a beta to fix the structure? Grammar wise, it's ok, at least I speak Spanish so I understand when something is written in a translated-to-English-directly way.

JKW2
JKW2Lv2

Brother, unlock some episodes.

Fated_Asura
Fated_AsuraLv11

the discord link is expired

Art233
Art233Author

I'll put a new one there

Fated_Asura:the discord link is expired
RyuSenju
RyuSenjuLv13

Will Olivia be the female lead?

Art233
Art233Author

Can’t say.

RyuSenju:Will Olivia be the female lead?
RyuSenju
RyuSenjuLv13

why not

Art233:Can’t say.
Art233
Art233Author

For know yes but I don’t know If it’ll be the same In the future

RyuSenju:why not
RyuSenju
RyuSenjuLv13

Olivia is the best girl

Art233:For know yes but I don’t know If it’ll be the same In the future
Art233
Art233Author

I know

RyuSenju:Olivia is the best girl
RyuSenju
RyuSenjuLv13

then let them be together

Art233:I know
Art233
Art233Author

They are currently but I'm not writing it because of the age. I don't want any grooming comments

RyuSenju:then let them be together
image
RyuSenju
RyuSenjuLv13

OK I see

Art233:They are currently but I'm not writing it because of the age. I don't want any grooming comments
Other Reviews
Harith_TM
Harith_TMLv15

Hello, review time. first of all i usually writte review, if i writte one, between 50-150 chapters not so early, but as i read authors notice of it will help hus story i will do so. as this story should have attention of readers, at least those who love football. so, i do in seriousness: writting quality: 5* - even if you can find there some grammar wrongdoings, they are so little or not so important that you will have any problem to understand story or it will not annoy you in any way. author even stopped using weeks to his aging, and puting only age there, so there are no more confusion, so i dont find needs to lower rating there. . Story development: 5* story is focused on football, which i consider right thing to do, mean there arent to many neccesary part pf story which would be usseless a little of slice of life there is is fine as its in good chemistry with the football part of story. even his girlfriend (not officialy yet) and his mon has some show up but not to much that it would postpone the story, which i find with great appreciation, so its all good. only note which i find a bit a pity is, POV of others persons. what i mean, for example commentator of matches are done well and trainers too, occasionaly spectators too, that is all well. but to side story for example there is mentioned clubs like chealsea, barca, real are curious about MC, well if its true, why not put some managers talk out there, or some club happening in backstage out of Izan knowing it, well just thats is my feeling, but overall story is developing in fine and good way, so thumbs up. btw you can even see author, how he is getting better, mb not in each chapter but when you see start of story and see ch.20+ for example i can see the developement of author himself (positively) well next. . Character design: 5*. Izan is good boy for me, he, he isnt stupid, but clever. but now what i found somehow surprised author put that he is good in study which i am surprised, not that those who do atletics ar edimb but doing top of class is rlly rare. but i dont mind it, as he as character rlly do things as smartass, he rlly upping his stats in overall way which is not bad to do, just i already mentioned in some comments, he should also focus on some stat where he will be original and one of the best in team, for example 30 percent of his point to give always to this stat (passing, dribling, avaranes whatever choosen) and 70 percent giving to his overall grow up, but thats just how i feel he should do, i am not author so whatever :D you will rlly like Izan anyway. other characters, well i think they are put there, and i dont feel like they have to small time of show up, by me its in optimal way. next up. . updating stability: for now i will give 5*, story is new and is updated rlly well i just hope author will keep it up a d dont drop it. . world background: 4* true be told, apart that its mentioned its post messi and ronaldo era, we dont know anything about happenings in the world at all, not that we need it right now, but i cant give full rate here, as there were a lot of great guys in football, and we dont even know if we see them in story as of now, even as a managers for example, Pavel Nedvěd, star of Lazio, after Juventus who went do job for his club as manager in Juventus, i know i mention someone from my country but i put it as example, but story is in early stage mb we will see Manager Messi, Ronaldo, Cole or others in it in future. who know :D so thats only stat where i lower rating for story. . Overall story is great and even if author go premium, i plan to read it, and in my clear conscience i can recomend this story for reading. i personaly when i have 3 power stones rdy i always give 1 to this story alongside two others i rlly like to read curently. So thanks Author for your work, for story you showing up, and pleas dont drop it.

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