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Astertian
AstertianLv154mth
2024-09-09 18:16

This is a great story so far. I've waited until the end of Volume 1 to give my review. Overall, I think the novel is quite unique, blending different elements from various genres, which I found both captivating and thrilling. The main character is exactly as he should be. In terms of his initial awareness and the adventures he experiences, he is gradually becoming overpowered, but the writing has handled his development perfectly so far, in my opinion. The world has a sense of mysticism and feels dangerous, which I really enjoyed. I think it would be great to include more details later on, perhaps about the world's background and the reasoning behind its divisions. Other than that, I had a fantastic time reading, and I'll continue to support both this novel and the author. Cheers!

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Amina_Abdullahi_1890
Amina_Abdullahi_1890Lv3

if you're looking for another fantastic read check out paradox of being ancient sukani's Return

Other Reviews
NitrogenousBeing
NitrogenousBeingLv14

The author’s writing skills have progressed since his previous work, The Innkeeper, particularly in that expectations set are upheld. The storyline and setting are great. The characters are decent and likable. However, the writing quality itself needs improvement. On the minor side, there are plentiful small grammatical errors, run-on sentences, and a notable amount of info dumping.  The work’s major flaw is the unnecessary, indirect, awkward, and abstract phrasing. This is particularly glaring in action scenes. Too often the MC’s direct senses are avoided or obfuscated. Instead, there is an uncalled-for post-analysis topdown view of events. It takes the reader out of the action.  Direct advice to the author: Please use direct phrasing. Write “It was this,” rather than, “He felt it was this,” or “He knew it was this,” or “It seemed like it was this.” Describe the MC experiences without processing them through a third party’s perspective. Avoid abstractions in fight scenes. Don’t write “Their fight, almost too fast for Nero to follow, seemed like a masterwork of a performance,” (quick example from chapter 9). Instead, write what is being sensed. For example, “A series of clangs rang out, as Invictus’s spear parried the colorful blur of magical sword attacks with masterful precision.” The second quote conveys similar information in a more detailed, direct, and exciting fashion. It gives us direct sound and sight without referring to Nero as the filter. This work could shine and garner greater popularity with an external editor or better self-editing that pays particular attention to the above flaws.

Despair512
Despair512Lv13
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