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Raventan
RaventanLv141yr
2023-12-08 18:30

live more than 1000+ year but master of none even trash these day better than this if they have that much time you try to write this you should make it better mc if this keep going to the way of modern time MC can only be beggar or homeless with this MC kind of mindset he will achieve nothing

The Immortal (twilight fanfiction)

Beans_on_a_tree
4.5
123 Chs

Liked by 20 people

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Replies2
Beans_on_a_tree
Beans_on_a_treeAuthor

how far into the fic did you get?

1yr
3
Kinato_123
Kinato_123Lv1

Do que tu t谩 falando mano ? Acho que tu leu uma fanfic diferente e t谩 comentando no lugar errado

4mth
Other Reviews
SpeedyG
SpeedyGLv10

This story is awesome, is original and plot makes sense, right amount of time skip w/o leaving unexplained gaps. It keeps you engaged in every chapter...

1yr

war777
war777Lv14

really excited to read more! one of the few twilight fanfic's that adds to the wold.

1yr
Apollocus
ApollocusLv13

It's quite good even I like the set up at the start and he seems pretty realistic as a person. I saw some people saying that oh he has no ambition and why did he learn to fight only after fighting a vampire. Well it's plain and simple, he can't die and it isn't even the start of the original twilight series we are still in old times and right now he is just enjoying life and what is currently happening is just the set up. Now for the fighting, that was the first vampire he fought and everything before that he could just one shot since he can't die. Like you can't tell you need something until you experience failure that shows what needs to be improved and how you can improve your weaknesses. All in all very good and I want more chapters.

1yr
mow
mowLv4

Not for me, the MC lacks ambition its just boring, dude spent over a thousand years doing nothing but living in tribes and did not even bother to learn any combat arts until after his first vampire fight. I honestly see no point in putting him this far before canon cuz he's doing nothing with his thousand years beside learning combat arts now and going around healing humans. If someone is this far back I expected some form of legacy being created like a Kingdom or a very strong Clan of descendants but nah its just yapping until canon finally arrives.

1yr
TinyBookDragon
TinyBookDragonLv4

The author isn't lying when they say 'average writing'. The grammar is fine but expect inconsistencies and an incompetent and dumb MC. He hides from a vampire, a vampire that should be able to hear his heartbeat and smell him. After being alive for over a thousand years he states that he still doesn't know how to fight and only decides to learn after fighting and killing a vampire. He learns how to use weapons even though the only thing that can hurt a vampire is another vampire. So many other things but you get the point.

1yr
Beans_on_a_tree
Beans_on_a_treeAuthor

What can I say? 馃槝 ----------------------

1yr
Valkorion_2003
Valkorion_2003Lv12

This story was so good that I couldn't stop and binged the whole thing in practically one go. Then I spent half an hour looking for something, anything like this to scratch the same itch and found nothing. It was torture. Amazing story, love the premise and the idea of the mc's small changes throughout history. The pacing is perfect. I can imagine that pacing would be the most difficult part of writing a story like this, one that covers such a long period of time but it was well done. I never felt bored. 10/10 would recommend!

4mth
MARLENE_ANGEL
MARLENE_ANGELLv1

OK AS A FAN THAT CAME LATE INTO THE STORY. START IN CHAPTER 12O..I LOVE THIS NOVEL IS A FUN READ..THE PLOT STORY IS FUN AND THE CHARACTER ARE FUN..I LOVE THE MC CHARACTER HIS FUN..ONE QUESTION WILL THE MC CREATE THE TECHNOLOGY TO TRAVEL TO OTHER PLANETS GALAXIES OR OTHER UNIVERSES AND WORLDS WHEN THE TWILIGHT STORY IS OVER . CMON AUTHOR THIS NOVEL HAS A LOT OF FUN POTENTIAL STORY..AUTHOR DO NOT QUIT THANK YOU.

1mth
Bad_news_83
Bad_news_83Lv3

Make Alice Cullen mc mate please if possible Alice Cullen mc mate Alice Cullen mc mate Alice Cullen Romantic mate for mc please Alice Cullen As mc wife please ?

1mth
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