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CouchPotatoDandy
CouchPotatoDandyLv55mth
2024-06-30 23:50

The grammar in the story is good I couldn't find any mistakes. The MC interactions and actions feels exactly how a 15 year old kid would. Unfortunately, this here is a reincarnated person who should be more grounded, not make rash decisions and have a more stable personality... Which unfortunately he doesn't have. Also, there are too many inconsistencies. With the author, sometimes saying "having 1,000 points in cursed energy control is very impressive among other Jujutsu users", but later that chapter saying his "energy control is way too awkward and have a lot to improve". Listing Gojo and Geto as special grade while they're still in tech school... Anyway there are a lot of inconsistencies that gave me an headache. To sum it up I would say the idea was good but the execution was poor. Writing quality: 5 Updating stability: 2 Story development: 3 Character design: 1 World background: 5

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Yesnth
YesnthAuthor

The inconsisties are not actually inconsisties at all. like it said 1000 points is good in terms of the average control of sorcerers. however, being impressive among the sorcerers does not equate to high control over cursed energy.

CouchPotatoDandy
CouchPotatoDandyLv5

When the MC got his first cursed technique you said his Cursed Energy is different from other people making it easier to control, and then in later chapters you said his Cursed Energy is hard to control compared to other people and that's when his second cursed technique came along and made it easier to control. I just gave you a few examples, I didn't write them all..

Yesnth:The inconsisties are not actually inconsisties at all. like it said 1000 points is good in terms of the average control of sorcerers. however, being impressive among the sorcerers does not equate to high control over cursed energy.
CouchPotatoDandy
CouchPotatoDandyLv5

I'm not writing this to discourage you or anything I just gave my honest opinion on the book. With a little organization here and there this is definitely be an excellent fanfic.

CouchPotatoDandy:When the MC got his first cursed technique you said his Cursed Energy is different from other people making it easier to control, and then in later chapters you said his Cursed Energy is hard to control compared to other people and that's when his second cursed technique came along and made it easier to control. I just gave you a few examples, I didn't write them all..
Yesnth
YesnthAuthor

Well, if you had taken the opportunity to read further, it would later be explained that his cursed energy is actually in a super position, like the schrodingers cat, making it exist in dual states.

CouchPotatoDandy:When the MC got his first cursed technique you said his Cursed Energy is different from other people making it easier to control, and then in later chapters you said his Cursed Energy is hard to control compared to other people and that's when his second cursed technique came along and made it easier to control. I just gave you a few examples, I didn't write them all..
Yesnth
YesnthAuthor

πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘

CouchPotatoDandy:I'm not writing this to discourage you or anything I just gave my honest opinion on the book. With a little organization here and there this is definitely be an excellent fanfic.
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