Inspired Author in training. Preparing for an official novel through fanfictions. Salted fish~
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I searched for Lord of Mysteries and went in the recently updated section.
Nice start. I'll be adding this to my library. hope this gets finished 🤞
seems interesting enough.
Nice start. Curious to see more👍
I'm not going to lie, this feels like AI writing to me. Not to mention the stakes that you're trying to covey here are really not that high and tension feels artificial at best. He's going to lose his life. Big deal when we already know he is going to survive. We haven't gotten to know him yet so there's no possible way for us to be invested in what he does. I won't say anything about the current sequence of events since a fanfic writer has all the rights to change things about the world and use their own interpretation, but the way this is going is really not all that entertaining to read. The Horror element is taken out completely here, it's basically just him being stupid and getting into fights he clearly shouldn't be attempting at his current level to create phantom tension. The chapters need to be longer and have a better grasp on the atmosphere. The key is in the details. The things that shouldn't be normal to be told to the readers. The way the first couple of chapters did it established the vibe impeccably, but now, it's spiraling down, rapidly. As someone who is trying to make his own lotm fanfic, I say this with all due respect, I don't think many people would enjoy this story as it's progressing right now. I get that you're trying to get into the action from the start and I would love to keep reading but the lack of any stakes and tension just keeps me from getting immersed.
I realize that. My point was if the scorroge pathway is included within the Sequence group, the Above the Sequence pertaining to the group would be MToD, not FoD. Above the Sequence of a pathway may not necessarily be synonymous with said pathway's GOO– from whom the pathways originate from in the first place.
Scrooge pathway isn't the part of the Father of Devils group. Understand it this way, a great old one is made out of various symbolises and authorities. The original great old one for those pathways which is the mother tree of desire has access to those symbolisms but lost them to Earth. The two pathway of the Abyss and chained make up the symbolisms for the Father of Devils, which is an entirety different GOO. If scrooge was also added, the alignment would become closer to the MToD and would no longer be considered a Father of Devil.
don't worry author. Real life always comes first. enjoying the work so far👍👍
Madness is eternal
I mean it works, but that wasn't the main point I wanted to convey. The problem is, with how strong he's gotten, getting tension in the story is virtually impossible due to how strong he's become, which then leads to scenarios like these where a random villain is introduced and a the Mc is given a crutch in the mean time. I mean, Toji would probably solo the entire mha verse regardless, but it breaks the immersion. As a personal preference I would have preferred to read him power walk through that guy that tried to mess with him, than to have my immersion broken and for the random background character to pose a challenge and threat himiko. It wouldn't be the case if the story took on a different approach; but when a story promises something and keeps promising the same thing for multiple chapters, it feels a bit cheap for the story to go in such a direction.