webnovel
_Frost_Lv131yr
2023-07-05 20:38

I have read up to chapter 20 and this is my thoughts so far. writing quality I put 4 stars, honestly for most part had no issue with reading the novel, there's just a few mistakes every now and then like repeating of words or mixing up male and female. most notable mistake that kinda hurts the story is when you are explain the 7 sins you put wrath twice and believe left out sloth.Now story development and character design I put 2 and 3 stars. Story feels rushed and because of that it also hurts Character development. Between the fact that the Mc was nobody and yet he's already in a capital interacting, pursuing and starting relationships with the most important characters within the country at ch20? Then we have the power scaling issues created because of this, you have a A- tier character that one of his duties is to watch over the castle the queen resides wanting to kill the Mc but for some reason such a important character only has the weakest or soldiers F- under him? would a imagine a A- captain assigned to the capital to have squads under him made up of D-C rank soldiers with C soldiers making up squad lead positions. with lieutenant positions being filled by C and B rank soldiers. Don't think you should of introduced this character as a rival to the Mc so soon.updating stability 5 stars- there's only praise for you to be able to upload so many chapters each week.Also just my preference, a harem made up of characters that all have different names but had no character development to distinguish them from the other characters might at as well all be the same character. Chill on the fan service and start putting challenges and arcs in place to really test and develop the main character other characters within the world.

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Replies3
Pendulum_Lv12

Bro you gave me a headache from this lol

_Frost_Lv13

because webnovel doesn't like paragraphs and lumbs everything all together, or another reason?

Pendulum_:Bro you gave me a headache from this lol
Pendulum_Lv12

The explanation lol, but that's because I'm dumb. I guess if paragraphs existed, it might have been easier to understand.

_Frost_:because webnovel doesn't like paragraphs and lumbs everything all together, or another reason?
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