everything up till where I read (chapter 35) seemed just convient and undeserved, just so happen to find friends that fit roles of what he wanted in his school, just so happened to find kekkei genkai (don't know if I spelled that correctly). just so happen to have a family that doesn't question knowledge that is above his age or creating jutsu at a young age. it's all just too convient and his power seems shallow, any fight taken he dominates unless he fights an obviously better opponent. the world around seems shallow and isn't described well. the concept was decent but the execution was mediocre. if author were to go back and edit his past chapter to input some more detail, stop giving everyone kekkei genkai, while also expanding on the main character getting his power through effort (like getting expirence through life or death situations), I think this novel could be better otherwise I feel it's too bland to continue.I hope my criticism is constructive and isn't taken poorly. i also hope if the author reads this it could help him for the future of his writing.
Liked by 9 people
LIKE
bruv almost dieing only gets you used to almost dieing. practicing and repeating stuff is how you improve on em. life ain't one piece. and most people don't just have funny eye super powers.
I can understand what your saying however, when I was talking about life or death battles I spoke wrong and I truly meant battles where he wasn't just slamming the enemy or getting slammed. i wanted something that would get my heart pumping and make me feel for the mc, I didn't want to turn this thing into some kind of Chinese translated novel where they get better in the middle of it.
ibxtoycatStan:bruv almost dieing only gets you used to almost dieing. practicing and repeating stuff is how you improve on em. life ain't one piece. and most people don't just have funny eye super powers.
Hey man, can you read my Fate fan-fic. It has flaws for sure and I want to see my mistakes. Give a critique. Click on my profile and read it please.
Notfriendsftw:I can understand what your saying however, when I was talking about life or death battles I spoke wrong and I truly meant battles where he wasn't just slamming the enemy or getting slammed. i wanted something that would get my heart pumping and make me feel for the mc, I didn't want to turn this thing into some kind of Chinese translated novel where they get better in the middle of it.
my man I already had it in my library, what a coincidence, ill push it forward and give it a read soon and provide you some constructive criticism. I will warn u I tend to be a bit blunt so it could come across a little rude.
Quetzalcotal:Hey man, can you read my Fate fan-fic. It has flaws for sure and I want to see my mistakes. Give a critique. Click on my profile and read it please.
That's fine. I'm not a professional. So, It's not like my work will be perfect. Constructive criticism will help me develop. So, go for it.
Notfriendsftw:my man I already had it in my library, what a coincidence, ill push it forward and give it a read soon and provide you some constructive criticism. I will warn u I tend to be a bit blunt so it could come across a little rude.
its a good quality fanfic you did a good job writing it i just saw this fanfic because of your comment and username [img=recommend]
Quetzalcotal:That's fine. I'm not a professional. So, It's not like my work will be perfect. Constructive criticism will help me develop. So, go for it.
Tq for info not logic from this novel
