webnovel
tt_g
tt_gLv41yr
2023-03-27 12:07

I see the potential but the writing is too convoluted. The dad spent like three paragraphs convincing the mom to let him cut the vegetables. If it’s not important to the story it’s simply unnecessary to spend so much time on something like this. It’s the same reason you cut down on unnecessary dialogue. There’s being descriptive and there’s being convoluted, and unfortunately this is the latter.

Overhauled

EpicBean
4.1
71 Chs

Liked by 56 people

LIKE
Replies4
EpicBean
EpicBeanAuthor

Thank you for the advice! I will try keep it in mind for the future, thank you!

1yr
19
General_Mahoraga
General_MahoragaLv3

True

1yr
hero4hire
hero4hireLv11

I feel the same way, i would've wrote my own review but i dont wanna hurt author rank so early since each vote carry alot of weight rn. I feel writing is too convuluted and author have the tendency to over explain simple event with over the top wording and redundant details.

EpicBean:Thank you for the advice! I will try keep it in mind for the future, thank you!
1yr
8
EpicBean
EpicBeanAuthor

Thanks for the advice! I am trying to work on it and make sure that what I want comes across clear but I do think that I have a tendency to over explain. The advice is more than welcome though and thank you for considering the ranking, it means a lot! I will try to improve in the future and I hope that I am getting better.

hero4hire:I feel the same way, i would've wrote my own review but i dont wanna hurt author rank so early since each vote carry alot of weight rn. I feel writing is too convuluted and author have the tendency to over explain simple event with over the top wording and redundant details.
1yr
5
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