Written in English, yet not localized at all. So we get people being called by their family name when this is supposed to be in English using English language patterns. This is a small but annoying detail. The English itself is not bad and plenty serviceable. My only issue with the book is the m.c and their 1 personality, and 2 decisions. The author is afraid to make any changes and it shows. He pretends to be vegeta to keep the story as is. This is irredeemable in my eyes. There are dozens of options that could easily work ,yet he makes the decision to play the part of vegeta. It seems the author is unable to go off the rails of the original story and, is making excuses for why the m.c acts the way they do. The author already skipped over vegeta's childhood by putting him into a grown vegeta's body which is obviouslya red flag of them being unable to write anything original at all. My biggest complaint is vegeta not even attempting to contact king kai while he is in his space pod. He could easily make contact due to knowing that king kai is keeping on eye on their arrival ,and he could talk to king kai in private and explain the situation that way, allowing for a far greater flexibility in the story. The way the story is from the forst few chapters show how much the author is trying hard at making up reasons for things to happen as they do. If you read this be prepared to be annoyed by a dumb m.c
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First of all, I thank you for taking the time and telling me your thoughts on this novel and I am also happy that you have pointed out my mistakes. Second thing- The story is much more like Vegeta's POV in the whole series. Being the author of my novel, I am free to do anything in this novel and yes I had all the chances in the world to make MC contact Kei, get into the Hyperbolic Chamber/time chamber and make him the world's most OP character who can slap Berus to death. but i didn't, because i wanted to follow the original storyline and the only difference would be, Goku chasing Vegeta. Being a fan of Vegeta, there is no way that i would destroy a character's unique trait just for the sake of views... there is a reason why the Dragon Ball Franchise is able to live so long is cause Goku and Vegeta always had their uniqueness no matter how much character development they get AND being a Fan of Vegeta, i want to see Vegeta not make stupid decisions and be always the 2nd character, i want to see him no.1 and that's why i created this novel. I wanted Vegeta's personality, his ego, and his pride, but also be calm and collected, which is not good considering Vegeta's personality and that is why there are two personalities but... no guarantee if that will remain forever The novel is for my own personal selfishness and i know that many people won't like it and they are free to hate it, i am open to the critics as that will help me improve further in my original works. Lastly, one more time, thanks for telling me about my mistakes, and hope to see you (if possible) in my future work. Thank you
I think having it be an isekai is the issue then. You could simply add a life changing event to vegeta's life that changes his character in some way to drive the changes you wish to occur. Having him have meta knowledge, but not use it, causes irritation to the readers. This would also help you retain vegetas character without making the new vegeta seem fake or forced.
