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TheNeeD
TheNeeDLv22yr
2022-07-10 13:07

After reading half of the chapter, I had one question: Does the author know what pronouns are? In each (well, almost) paragraph, the hero's name is mentioned more than twice. And to protect my eyes, I decided that with this work we are not on the way

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Dark_Bangali
Dark_BangaliAuthor

I will try to correct my mistakes. My English is my second language. I am not a native English speaker.

TheNeeD
TheNeeDLv2

How would it be easier to explain. Do you use only first names or pronouns when talking to someone? Description of landscapes (We could see the mountain, the mountain was high) | (We could see the mountain, it was high.). Description of the person (Alex was standing next to me, Alex was blond) | (Alex was standing next to me, he was blond.). Or as an example (The sun was at the zenith, the sun was yellow.) | (The sun was at the zenith, it was yellow). And the problem is that pronouns are not used in principle (Maybe it was a couple of times). When one name is mentioned five times per paragraph, it hurts the eyes. The use of the simplest pronouns (He, she, it, you, we) is not as difficult and not as eye-cutting as the constant use of the name.

Dark_Bangali:I will try to correct my mistakes. My English is my second language. I am not a native English speaker.
Rafian
RafianLv5

ok so the writing quality is poor . what about the story then??

TheNeeD:How would it be easier to explain. Do you use only first names or pronouns when talking to someone? Description of landscapes (We could see the mountain, the mountain was high) | (We could see the mountain, it was high.). Description of the person (Alex was standing next to me, Alex was blond) | (Alex was standing next to me, he was blond.). Or as an example (The sun was at the zenith, the sun was yellow.) | (The sun was at the zenith, it was yellow). And the problem is that pronouns are not used in principle (Maybe it was a couple of times). When one name is mentioned five times per paragraph, it hurts the eyes. The use of the simplest pronouns (He, she, it, you, we) is not as difficult and not as eye-cutting as the constant use of the name.
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