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Enormiity
EnormiityLv42yr
2022-06-18 06:36

First Of All This review is written after I read the entire volume 1 Writing Quality The grammar is great there are hardly any mistakes, but so far there is no rhythm or flow inside the story itself making the story easy to read but hard to understand. Story Development The story itself is kinda weird so far. There are so many possible plot holes in the first volume, some of the MC's action is just suicide (Like the time the mc save some Fish-Man from a Celestial Dragon which is not possible logically since the cipher pol observing said Celestial Dragon will catch the MC in action.) Character Design The MC is an idiot who can't even use an aspect of his logia devil fruit, most of what the MC does in the first volume is just plot point, the only real connection the MC makes is just the old man that helps him other than that everyone is either superior, colleague, or enemy. Update Stability The update is pretty stable so far. World Background This is one of those weird aspects of the story, the timeline is pretty good and accurate the author uses One Piece world history to his benefit but other than that the world background is pretty messed up, for example, the Cipher Pol (World Government (WG) secret agency) is explained to some trainee and even some of the MC generation becomes CP agent from the Marine Training program while the Cipher Pol is an organization that is fully under the control of WG that normal people not supposed to even know existed. Overall This story has a lot of potential but the author can't execute it properly. The Timeline that the author chose is so far back that by the time canon starts the world will already be very different. For Reference Some stories like this one that do it correctly are "God Of Soul System" just different overall plot goals since that one aims to be a multiverse story.

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Crazibrains_
Crazibrains_Author

Thannks for the review

Other Reviews
Stray99th
Stray99thLv13

Had to end my reading of this novel at chapter 84. The WG cutting of the entire Marines, which is essentially their state military, because they chose to let some self-righteous upstart run around freely doing w.e he wants, even though they're aware his DV is special, should be a deal breaker for any One Piece fan. Not only did this Author butcher One Piece's established history by inserting his MC as a destined one, he also showed zero respect to the characters by lowering their IQ to make things convenient for his MC. It's lazy and forces the readers to dumb down their own intelligence just so they can carry on reading. The MC, as well, has no semblance of a personality. All he has is motivation, and that's it. The 1 dimension to his personality is he is self-righteous and thinks he can do anything he wants as long as he thinks it's right, leading to him and his thoughts being more frustrating to read than the fact that everyone around him is several times dumber than their canon counterparts. Not that the other characters feel 'real' either. The OCs have no personality and it's impossible to distinguish them if not for their codenames. The only way to salvage this god-awful novel is to switch the pov to the straw hats and just focus on their interactions with the MC. Not that it matters when the WG is literally going to war against their own military for the dumbest reason a mentally functional person could think of. All in all, the only good thing about this fanfic is the pacing. And that's just talking about pacing relatively, given that One Piece fanfics tend to rush through the timeline like they're never going to run out of content. I probably missed a lot of flaws but I don't think it matters. This should be enough to discourage enough with half a brain from reading this god-awful take on One Piece.

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