webnovel
Brian_Hanes_117
Brian_Hanes_117Lv13yr
2022-03-20 02:13

The writing is good and the grammar is outstanding. One little issue I see with the grammar is that there are too often paragraphs that are massive in size which makes the read a bit less fun. The updates are steady, the story is solid, the characters are cool, and the world building is good. The description is better than average but I'd like to know more about what the environment and characters look like. Feel free to look at my story "Avatar: Macai's Journey" and let me now what you think.

Lightwielder

Sjsnwhnxshsh1
4.7
23 Chs

Liked it!

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Other Reviews
Sjsnwhnxshsh1
Sjsnwhnxshsh1Author

Shameless review from author! Just so you guys know, I'm attempting to do maybe a chapter every other day. However, because I'm a student, the schedule might not be regular... If you like it, add it to your library and share!

3yr

Yyyyyyyyyyyyy_
Yyyyyyyyyyyyy_Lv10

This novels is really good and it starts, with the relationship between a friend who is a adult and the protagonist, Ronan, who is 11 years old and his friend is really nice. Next, the development is going in the right direction, but perhaps you can add a synopsis, to let the readers know what the novel is about! But so far, the novel is going to the right direction! And keep up the good work Author-sama! :)

3yr
Cyclxne
CyclxneLv2

Overall a very solid book, though I do have a few pointers just as recommendations for the author. First, try to write a more detailed synopsis. The current one is somewhat broad and doesn't feel interesting. Second, create a more unique cover, preferably with the book title and main character on it. Honestly, that's about it, the actual story itself is fine, and I like the concept. Keep it up, author.

3yr
AlexanderCao
AlexanderCaoLv1

A very nice story. The synopsis should give more. I really love the idea of getting gradually stronger/better the character and not like born an OP with a cheat code on life etc.

3yr
Cooldude3
Cooldude3Lv2

Hohoho! Nice one.

3yr
LucienNg
LucienNgLv1

Interesting so far. Took me a while to read, but it was worth it. Your writing is consistent, to the point of flawless (not that I’ve seen one so far) as it seemed that you even proofread before posting the chapters. It was a comfortable read, to be honest. Only one small advice though. Maybe dividing your big paragraphs into smaller ones, so that its easier for mobile readers to enjoy your story? I have no problems reading the story as it is since I’m using a tablet, but that may not be the same for smartphones. Aside from that, I like how the plot is progressing so far. I really don’t know why, but I thought the MC was kinda cute as a child (though he appeared quite edgy at times. Maybe I’m wrong, but that just makes the story a bit more realistic.). Please keep up the good work. All the best to you, and your future writing journey :).

3yr
BrightBrain256
BrightBrain256Lv3

The plot is cool. I can't wait to see where his Destiny leads him to. Looking forward to more of this. Keep going 🏅🏅🏅And the unique thing about the sword

3yr
Ice_Princesss
Ice_PrincesssLv4

The book has a lot of potential and is fast-paced. I feel bad for Roran since he is only 11 and has to survive in such a terrifying world. I do feel that you mention Roran's name too many times so why don't you try replacing his name with a 'He'. For example instead of saying 'Roran was tired. Roran decided to go to sleep' say 'He waas tired. He decidedc to go to sleep'. You get the gist. All the best!

3yr
Notyet
NotyetLv1

This story has a very intersting plot and characters. There are details, and the developement is intriguing. Overall it is a very enjoyable read. Nice Job!!!!!!!!

3yr
Lancee
LanceeLv1

A good read. The story itself has potential to be something trully amazing, the plot seems promising through out the chapters and the character's are life like which is good at the reader's interpretation. Overall i liked the story.

3yr
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