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Eid_zack
Eid_zackLv43yr
2021-06-25 17:39

too fast mate,the story develop too fast,just hope you could slow down the pace of the story,in just 3 chapter he got to admiral strength, it's too fastt

ONE PIECE : TALE OF AN UNPARALLELED LEGEND..

godlyarrogantz_305
4.0
67 Chs

Liked by 12 people

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Replies2
godlyarrogantz_305
godlyarrogantz_305Author

actually in my fanfic there are people stronger than garp in the marines ,I'd you read the auxiliary chapter I have made a heirarchy of marines and garp ,SENGOKU is tier 9 vice admiral and garp wasn't serious when fighting Lincoln in chap 3 like when he got serious and punched him away and made Lincoln retreat . in the one piece anime garp was like the marines best of the best ,just read my auxiliary and garp hasn't reached his prime thank you for the feedback 😊 I'll try and make it slower and make powerups more believable 😊

3yr
3
Moh_Hizam_Novrian
Moh_Hizam_NovrianLv1

Sebenarnya itu memang cepat tapi wajar karena dia hidup di kapal yang penuh monster dan diajarkan sama monster jadi kalau itu kau bilang cepat salah

3yr
Other Reviews
Sathya_Singh
Sathya_SinghLv3

noice best best 👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯👍💯

3yr

Regulus_Dragneel
Regulus_DragneelLv4

You are writing a nice book as a fellow author I can tell that your story has very good potential keep writing and we will be always waiting for new releases

3yr
merocamero
merocameroLv4

​Captain Usopp's was killed on the way to Laugh Tale and see his sweetest dream in the underworld, lol. Pitiful parody of Path to Power. So boooooooring.

3yr
Blood_Reading
Blood_ReadingLv1

🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐

3yr
AngelsCreed
AngelsCreedLv13

I think this story has a lot of potential. Key points to look out for: 1) use of dialogue, think you could Make use of more dialogue. the entire story is written in Lincolns thoughts with sparse use of dialogue. 2) character development: The story is too focused on Physical development and has ignored much of lincolns mental development 3) world sEtting: the entire transition to rocks Pirates, the worlD government, strength levels are not too clear Even with the auxiliary chapter 4) Story pace: reading just the first few chapters, it Already the gives the feeling that the story will end in 10-15 chapters max. You want to make sure you have a modest goal in terms of how long this fanfic will be and pace yourself to achieve that goal

3yr
BookDevourer87
BookDevourer87Lv15

Interesting story but poorly written... The writing style and the bad grammar make it somewhat hard to have fun reading this. With an editor this might become a rather good story.

2yr
PixelLord95
PixelLord95Lv14

Bro this is my favourite, i liked the powel scale in the one piece verse of this fic its amazing. ive read too many ”cliche” one piece fanfictions but this one blew my mind with all the suprises i shed a couple tears with xebec and the duo

2yr
AwokenShawn
AwokenShawnLv13

One of the best ond peice novels I’ve read Hggff dcghf F gfgfhfgcggfggghfffugfhvhbgffhfffhhdhfgfhgfggggfggfy F F and j F b

3yr
QuiteSarcastic
QuiteSarcasticLv4

So i have started this story, and i am not sure if i am willing to put in time to read it. Mainly pointing towards the use of grammar and messy paragraphs all along since the get go. All i can see tho from the reviews, it's super overrated, grammar is leaning towards machine translations, even if it is not. just to put a perspective on it. Main character is quite a fresh thing, not what is usual for mc's to build on, i like the start of the story but. it's a major turn of with the grammar and how quick paced it is. No offence to author.

3yr
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