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Usiel
UsielLv132yr
2022-05-23 17:48

I realty did not like mentality, personality and naivety of the MC. Reincarnated, knows full well everything which is going to happen, yet did not take the slightest of advantage of this. Controlled like a puppet. Nerd to to the extreme. Trying to be cool and mysterious yet he is nothing but a kid with full knowledge of the cannon and idiocy of a troll. With all these points still not OP on anything. I do not recommend this. Unless you like to kill your time with something.. Not even that..

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SrCuervo
SrCuervoLv4

Hi, I'm writing an HP Fanfaction, it would help me a lot if you read it and comment what you think, you can find it on my profile or look for it as: Harry Potter: Narnia and the World Hidden in a Closet.

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LordInsanity
LordInsanityLv5

Nice novel. If only the MC wouldn't go to such unreasonable and dumb lengths to satisfy his own goals(?) this novel would be great. Now you might be thinking from my first statement, that the MC is a person who would kill a person to achieve his goal. That's not what I meant. He would do something stupid or annoying to satisfy himself. Case 1 is presented in Ollivanders, he came back there after getting his wand to see his mother. Which in turn alerted Malfoy Senior of his existence. For some reason it seemed like love at first sight to him after being pushed out of her womb and being immediately disowned by his father, and his mother who was confunded? into accepting it. You think his father would just sit around and watch his spawn toddle around without bothering him? Just reading that chapter was annoying on a whole new level. You'd think a mature and rational person was reincarnated, but nope! Just a typical savant. Case 2: He joins Hogwarts, and there's no mention of the Room of Requirement (RoR). He makes a point that there's no place where he can escape Dumble's sights, but why would the headmaster even bother with him when Potter and Weasley are around? Author doesn't address it. RoR = Possible mental defenses, wealth, and more. Case 3: His philosophical debates on morals/ethics/world views with an 11 year old girl, and later another senior student. Blah Blah Blah Muggleborn students aren't treated right, the world is violent, magic. Ok, you didn't need to start a lecture to an 11 year old, no matter how smart she is. It was a senseless waste of time, instead of a lecture, just let her know in terms an 11 year old would understand. Case 4: From what I am getting here, a reincarnated grown man becomes a Malfoy, is disowned because he's thought to be a squib, and now he is seemingly hype focused on his birth mother, even implying to the readers that she is closer to him than the adoptive parents that have raised him for years? Where's the logic in this? Case 5: Should have put this earlier, but he confides hermione into his "little secret" of being a pureblood but classified as a muggleborn. He's really smart, like he was never an 11 year old in his past life or ever met another 11 year old who can keep a secret? Author has a thing for Hermione. Case 6: What was the point putting him in Ghouse? Why not Ravenclaw, since he likes to study? Overall your MC acts like a smartass with dumb reasons. I know he has some knowledge on the canon, since he mentions things that he shouldn't know several times? I am and C23 and am already frustrated.

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