webnovel
avatar

Review Detail of LordSputnik in Seen Zone Z

Review detail

LordSputnik
LordSputnikLv123yrLordSputnik

I just noticed that I was asked to review the other novel, HAPPY EVER AFTER, and not this one. Well, guess I'm doing both! The Good: The characters are solid with enough backstory that one can relate to them. The author has created a fairly interesting premise and kept it unique enough that it doesn't feel like every other apocalypse novel out there. The Bad: Grammar mistakes galore, but I feel like it is a result of translation so if I consider that then it isn't so bad. The story itself is great and well-paced, but I feel like it doesn't know what it wants to be. (It starts as a sad drama, then a happy romance, and then an apocalypse survival.) Suddenly saying "12 years later" really forces the readers to make a lot of assumptions. It would be nice to know how Lucas and Erin met again considering they escaped a plantation from somewhere when they were kids. The Neutral: While the plot is fairly entertaining, having us assume so much about the world, Emily, and Lucas makes it very easy for people to get the wrong idea about how certain events actually happened according to the author. I do understand that the author is not forcing the reader through the plot and that's good, but we still need a little guidance. The author should try to be careful with the timeline... the kids were ranging from the ages of 8-12 in Chapter 2 and Lucas was on the plantation for 5 years in chapter 4 so we assume he is 12 at the time of the escape. Strangely, the older kids never bothered trying to escape you said, so is Lucas the exception? The author struggles a bit with translating certain tenses, but I do see that those become less and less as I got further into the story. Keep it up and do not stop writing.

altalt

Seen Zone Z

Aeipathy_02

Liked by 3 people

LIKE

Replies1

Aeipathy_02
Aeipathy_02AuthorAeipathy_02

Thank you so much for this in-depth review ≧◇≦. This makes me think a lot about a lot of things you have given and pointed out. I should have made clear that Lucas is listening to them because he is worried about Erin in the escape plan, they are planning. I would try to make improvements based on this. And yes, I kind of request, that you review my other story when I saw how you give in-depth reviews. I'm really struggling with that one, aside from the grammar, I do feel that I made a lot of plot holes and the pacing is a mess but I can't point out what needs to be fixed. I would be grateful if you could review Happy Even After. (I would also review two of your books as my thanks but it might take some time due to hw :'(. and I really want to return the favor.)