I must confess I have been quite candid while writing this review, more so than I usually would be. This is in the hope to help you progress, rather than to simply song you praise. So with that in mind: While I clearly recognise the effort you take to tell us your story, I find it very difficult to immerse myself. I do not feel invited to read beyond the first few paragraphs. I could account this to two things: firstly, the poor sentence structure and grammar, and secondly, the lack of rhythm. The protagonist himself is engaging, and he has a certain youthful nativity about him that makes him entertaining. Lastly, I wish to bring up the chemistry, which feels very obligatory, and does not thoroughly convince me. I do recognise that this is very hard to write. I hope I did not dissuade you too much and wish you a lot of fun continuing your story.

I'll give credit to the author for uploading multiple chapters within a day it seems. IN addition, I can see that this novel is doing what it can to present an interesting and cohesive storyline. The ideas are here, although there needs to be some revisions for some parts of the story, which have telling instead of showing. In addition there isn't much to say about the characters or the setting of the novel itself, but I suppose they will be explored later on. Keep on writing author. It's best you double check on your structure of the novel, how sentences flow. Maybe take your time on the chapters and their respective uploads. Good luck.

I like the premise of the story yet I feel like the world building is lacking though this can easily be solved in the coming chapters. The first chapter seemed like an info dump just to get to where the main character is but I guess it was intended this way. The story makes me very curious as to who Ray Tristan is. Some minor lapses in grammar is also present although it is understandable and can easily be fixed. I wish you luck in your upcoming chapters. Keep up the good work.

The premise is interesting and I can see the complexity of the characters and system of the world. There are a few grammatical errors, but other than that this is a promising series.

Hey I like this book very much. Like how you started it. Please keep writing. I am voting you with power stone so hope that you win wpc. I hope you keep the story more fun and descriptive.

Hi ! I love the premise and the characters, i've read stories like these before but the style of romanticism in your book is what strikes me. Kudos to you for uploading so many chapters at one go ! I want you to focus more on- -Descriptives as it helps the reader imagine better -Use ProWriting or Grammarly to correct sentence structures -Provide Character sketches Please just take it as feedback, i will be re reading the novel once again and reviewing once changes are made, its not criticism, its only to help you grow! ^-^

The story has its own interesting twist. It has an intriguing main character and a good plot. In the few chapters i read, the story has a good potential. However, I would suggest working on the sentence structure and some grammar issues to make it more captivating and to improve your storytelling. Keep writing.

La historia es buena, pero el desarrollo inicial del personaje y del mundo es muy Malo, primero el MC pareciera tener cultivo pero no dicen si es un mundo de cultivo, luego de más se ve que es uno moderno y no se detalla mucho del MC lo cual es un poco confuso entre sí es cultivo o moderno, bueno es solo eso lo que me molesto al principio. La historia esta interesante noto algunas escenas similares a otras novelas, pero supongo que sólo será similar o no? Sigue con el buen trabajo👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻

Love the story and the character, i hope you'll write more story like this. I love how you make the character. Hope you'll have some bright future.