webnovel
MellowFellow
MellowFellowLv144yr
2021-05-01 10:23

It's a good story I'd say, excellent plot for me. Love the characters intro so far. World build is ok tho but need more explanation as story goes, n i hope it keeps going. Maybe u need editors to fix some grammar errors n paragraphs also dialogues. But overall i love this story. You got me hooked the moment you start another pov. Seriously its great.

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Hadi_Abdul_Hadi
Hadi_Abdul_HadiAuthor

Thank you so much.I really appreciate what you said.

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AntiLoliLewding
AntiLoliLewdingLv4
terrythor46
terrythor46Lv4

So to start off with... this isn't a gamer story. This is a normal zombie apocalypse with a system. I repeat this is NOT a gamer story. This is a SYSTEM story. As for the story itself, it's okayish to bad. The System is badly designed to the point that it doesn't really serve much of a purpose. It reminds of an old zombie apocalypse novel, my OP shop in the Zombie Apocalypse. The system is just there for the player to buy stuff and that's how it feels here. Other than being a shop and a quest giver the system has zero purpose even though the story makes seem like there's more. I liked that he's alone in the beginning. This feels more realistic in that there's little chance of encountering another survivor early in the apocalypse. Either people are turtling in their houses or go out whenever the MC is resting. Pacing is bad. It's fast and when he encounters another human, it picks up quickly. Slow it down and space out the time in the story. Another thing to note is that he trusts the first human he comes across too fast despite growing up as an outcast. There should be some hesitation in trusting people, but he gives the girl his gun trusting her. He wastes medical supplies on her and even fights a boss zombie because of her. After the introduction to the girl the pacing beings to go too fast with introducing the world. First the ninja girl, then the gangsters, then the introduction to the world's logic... Simply put there's little downtime to actually absorb the information before the next big thing happens. There should at least be some downtime for the MC to absorb the information he's gotten but doesn't. That's the only real major problem with this novel. It moves way too fast for its own good and suffers.

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