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LostClouds
LostCloudsLv44yr
2020-11-23 04:41

Overall it's alright if you are new to fanfics. The author is very familair with the world and is so far avoiding most pitfalls other fanfics find themselves in. However the story has some bad vibes from the get go. First of all the pacing is way to fast to give the reader any sort of stability when reading the fanfic. What I mean by that is the author gives us the readers the bare bone set up that most fictions give to set up the story when using reincarnation, Mc dies then is reborn. Simple right but the problem lies with that after that the author's focus is on the MC's power rather than their character. From what I got from the MC in the first few chapters is that he was a kid who played football, had decent tolerance in ignoring drunks and that he didn't ignore Naruto. Everything else is a stat flex on a bunch if children who aren't even in the academy and we even got a time skip to boost MC right before it. And the biggest dissapointment to this point is that by doing so one of the biggest factors that draw in readers is ignored, The DOG. Seriously i'm not saying you shouldn't give it a read as the author clearly puts their heart into the story, it's just that there is a clear feel in lack of direction to the story to make it feel unique. And to people who argue it's inherently great because there is no harem, and that the MC isn't God from chapter 1 you are doing the author and yourselves a disservice for rating the fiction highly on that alone.

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WooingTheStars
WooingTheStarsAuthor

Finally a good constructive review! So, I have to say I do agree with you. The reason why the MC's character isn't very developped would be mainly because I have been writing completely forgetting the fact that people don't know the MC as I do. As such, you can expect a bit more on than end coming soon, probably after the Konoha invasion. Also, about the dog, Guremaru. There is a problem with being an Inuzuka and having a Ninken. Once things grow to Gaara level, the god is useless. You can't put a Ninken to fight against a Jincuuriki or a Bijuu because it will simply die. The reason why Guremaru hasn't been having a lot of action is because I have been thinking of ways to make him stronger so he can stand by Ryota's side as a trustworthy partner, and I have had a few ideas, one of which has already been teased. In the last chapter I clarified that Guremaru wasn't born in between the Inuzuka's Ninken, so his origin remains unknown. That is what I want to capitalize in so he can do something later on. The problem is that, unless I make Guremaru have Gamabunta levels of power, he is going to remain useless for the entire story. In fact, if Ryota were to fight with Guremaru, he's have to be careful of him not getting hurt or killed. THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM, I HOPE MORE READERS LIKE YOU COME SOON!

StrikingWave
StrikingWaveLv3

Yeaaaaaaah the doooog, I ever have a problem with pets in dangerous worlds, they are basically a CHARGE, a charge that you don't need by the way

joe_caa
joe_caaLv2

thank god that you stopped writing this story. it was becoming terrible

WooingTheStars:Finally a good constructive review! So, I have to say I do agree with you. The reason why the MC's character isn't very developped would be mainly because I have been writing completely forgetting the fact that people don't know the MC as I do. As such, you can expect a bit more on than end coming soon, probably after the Konoha invasion. Also, about the dog, Guremaru. There is a problem with being an Inuzuka and having a Ninken. Once things grow to Gaara level, the god is useless. You can't put a Ninken to fight against a Jincuuriki or a Bijuu because it will simply die. The reason why Guremaru hasn't been having a lot of action is because I have been thinking of ways to make him stronger so he can stand by Ryota's side as a trustworthy partner, and I have had a few ideas, one of which has already been teased. In the last chapter I clarified that Guremaru wasn't born in between the Inuzuka's Ninken, so his origin remains unknown. That is what I want to capitalize in so he can do something later on. The problem is that, unless I make Guremaru have Gamabunta levels of power, he is going to remain useless for the entire story. In fact, if Ryota were to fight with Guremaru, he's have to be careful of him not getting hurt or killed. THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM, I HOPE MORE READERS LIKE YOU COME SOON!
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