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John_sins1
John_sins1Lv124yr
2020-09-26 10:48

The english is great and the story is easily understandable. The actual writing itself is excellent and the author has real talent. However, within the first two chapters i was immediately turned off, first the ‘reaper’ shafts the MC and takes away his companion choice but fair enough Bellatrix Lestrange has the potential to be a hot but violent yandere. Through sheer lazy writing though the author just has the reaper mind **** her so that she is immediately devoted to the MC. I mean she was cleared of all mind manipulation by Voldemort and was able to think for herself for once while sane. Instead of having an actual relationship develop between the two throughout the novel the author just says **** it and kills her personality. Not my style sorry.

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Replies1
Otsutsuki_Jin
Otsutsuki_JinLv12

So true. She's a true yandere, and to take that away was stupid.

Other Reviews
redHussar
redHussarLv2

This story is a textbook example of reversed seㄨism. In MC's kingdom, only women are taught magic. Only women are shown to be captains of ships. Mc's partners - women - are magic-users more powerful than him by the order of magnitude. Social help - only for children and women in a bad situation. Regent of their kingdom - that's right, a woman. Another unpleasant part of the story is kingdom building in GOT world. Usually, one of my favorite genres. Sadly, here all is based on magic. There is no technology uplift, contact with other countries. The MC intentionally chooses the magical route to make his people dependent on him but simultaneously is going to abandon them in a couple of years. Their regent? Yara, a known pirate from canon that was completely ok with pillaging and rąp1ng. At the same time, their kingdom has such strong hiding wards, that without MC's control the pirates will have a perfect base to hide from justice and return to their old ways. They created a foundation for an evil empire and they are just shrugging and saying that it's not their problem. One of the most off-putting parts of the fanfic was romance and the author's f3t1sh for ÑTR. The author looks down on women who didn't sleep with anyone previously. The MC wants his girls well used by other men before he takes them. His chosen partners were previously married or in a relationship. First magic users taught by him - salt-wives - sẹ̀ㄨ slavẹ̀s of iron-borns. The grammar is perfect, almost unseen on this website but it's not enough to offset the serious flaws in plot.

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