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ManiKaur
ManiKaurLv24yr
2020-12-10 17:26

I gave a thought and writing my review again. The author has tried her best to give a different story. But ML is not what I had expected. He is Highly Dangerous and Possessive. But his all actiond are mot justified. The way he describe his love for FL is not healthy. He has crushed her feelings when his truth came out. He doesn't feel ounce of remorse for his actions. Whatever FL tried to say he never think that he is hurting her. In the end FL has to compromise with his threatening. I disliked this most, it like he has coolly crushed her feelings under his feet, He only has regarded his own feelings. He did several things... which i can't say. It hurted me the most reading this. Moreover the Brutal rape isn't been warned before, which made me highly uncomfortable. Rape is always a rape, it can't be use as the way to take revenge... this was most hurting thing. Rape left a woman with traumatic pain which is nearly impossible for her to come out. I only read to see whether he feel remorse ... but he doesn't at all feel remorse for single time. That means he doesn't respect FL feelings. Wish this story hadn't has rape as revenge and wish ML wasn't this possessive, then this story had high potential to reach at high level. I'm giving stars only for FL.

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SunScar9
SunScar9Lv4

I read the first 8 chapters of this novel and am basing my review on that alone. Writing Quality: I feel like you will learn how to write precisely with time. Knowing that it is your first novel, I won't go hard on you, but here are some things you can improve: 1) Grammar- you could use a free grammar checker online or a paid service if you like to see where you are going wrong. Read more books to get a sense of how grammar flows. 2) Sentence Structure- You have a lot of run-on sentences. This means that you are either not using proper punctuation or you have long-winded sentences that lose meaning. Stability of Updates: I don't know about the routine but this author has posted a lot of chapters over the month, so I will trust their dedication to posting on time. Story Development: It is slow. But because it is the initial chapters, I won't judge based on it. Character Design: The author needs to work on making the characters multi-dimensional. I mean... your characters are predictable and say things that make them all seem like the same person. I don't see how each character is different from the other. The author tells me the personality but doesn't show me how they are as people. This is something the author needs to improve on. World Background- I was a bit confused by the names at first but quickly realized that it was a diverse community as most global cities are. I will need a little more information on the background of the characters, their lives, and their aspirations to make a better judgment.

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