Review Detail of HolloH in Journey Towards Greatness

Only read up to chapter 10. Grammar could use improvement. Inconsistant time sequencing, jumping around w/ no real flow. Author doesn’t delve beyond the surface of any character, including the Mc. Despite Mc supposing to have the mind of an old man, he doesn’t show the wisdom of even an *****. Has sex w/ another character randomly, completely out of nowhere w/ no lead up. This character was introduced a paragraph before you find out they have sex. When the author addresses this, it is supposed to be assumed by the reader that this grandpa has mad game, conquering a woman who works in customer service presumably for years in a span of a conversation, and naturally both parties have no mixed feelings about randomly f**king and then saying “bye have a nice life”, never to meet again. Like, hah??? Unless your looking to invest in the long hall and hope it gets better, there is far better stories and **** on this website, would not recommend this work in the slightest. Oh and in the very first fight his pokemon uses more than 4 moves. Like WTF, this Gramps reincarnated after being beaten over the head by a gameshark or some s**t.