Thanks for explaining the reasoning behind your review. I have been meaning to rewrite the beginning chapters for a while.

I rewrote Prologue, Chapter 1, Chapter 2 and Chapter 3, do you think they've improved? Or have I missed anything.

I reread the prologue and the 1st chapter, and they are a lot better but there are definitely still issues(there always will be though.) If I were to make one suggestion, it would be to make your sentences shorter and ******r. It's harder to write long sentences properly, and there's often no benefit... "All her life she felt that there was something missing, it was one of the main reasons she became an extreme sports enthusiast as it was one of the few times where she felt adrenaline and excitement from the risk of challenging herself." Could be something like: "All her life she felt that there was something missing. It was one of the main reasons she became an extreme sports enthusiast because it was one of the few times where she felt adrenaline and excitement from the risk of challenging herself." Until you get more experience you should probably avoid having 3 independent clauses in one sentence(which is what you did above.) Also probably avoid having more than 2 dependent clauses per independent clause. This is a long sentence that stood out to me as well written, but its still awkward to read b/c of a couple mistakes that you probably wouldn't have made if you didn't try to cram so much into one sentence. "As the azure lighting bolt disintegrated Dana's body, her soul was pushed towards another realm, arriving quickly towards the Azure Continent, within a world completely different from the one she is familiar with, a world of cultivation." Change to: "As the azure lighting bolt disintegrated Dana's body, her soul was pushed towards another realm, arriving quickly at the Azure Continent within a world completely different from the one she was familiar with, a world of cultivation." So, you used a comma where you shouldn't have, switched tenses where you shouldn't have, and paired 'arriving' with 'towards,' which you shouldn't have. Arriving needs to be paired with a location. You arrive at a place, in a place, below a place, above a place, beside a place, etc. The thing about 'towards' is that you can face towards a place from literally anywhere. Saying you're arriving towards something gives no actual information. If that sentence wasn't so long and complicated, you probably would have caught two of those mistakes and made it easier to read. If you want to get better, you should probably find/hire someone to edit your work, or you could read more English novels. And I mean more actual books, not webmovels. You want something edited and written well so you don't pick up on bad habits. Good luck

S.i.m.p.l.e.r was censored for some reason...

Well be could hire you :).

He not be (dam:()