Well, while I am elated that a new "modern army vs fantasy world" is available here, I must say that I am not digging the continuous time skip directly to a new location with no further elaboration like the village being raided by bandits. Also, some revision is needed to remove a lot of typos. Overall, I give this story a 3.74/5 rating. May I suggest a POV to the otherworld people on how they are reacting to the "demons"? Also, try not to make the story look rushed make it more immersive on how the US deals woth the opportunity given to them, what with an untouched world with an abundance of resources ripe for the taking, the consequences of conscripting civilians to the other world's military that may lead from a ****** riot to a revolt after the US introduces to them the concept of ******* and equality. Can I ask if there are demihumans in this world like elves? Also, keep up the good works and improve yourself on past experiences.
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Hm, first of all thank you for this review and seconds ok I'll work on making the time-skips more fluid but it might lessen my update rate. And yeah typos are the products of my daily quota updates, and good idea! I have done it with the rescued civvies and all but ill work on your suggesrion. And how can I make it more 'immersive' to he u?
Sorry for the typing mistakes in the reply im on mobile rn and its clunky.
Immersive? Well for starters, I still don't know what the Kingdom looks like in a detailed description. Also, I don't know if there are other Kingdoms or Major terriitories in the other world. Overall, try to make an in depth perception of the other world to make the readers know what kind of world the US is dealing with.
NlaEid:Hm, first of all thank you for this review and seconds ok I'll work on making the time-skips more fluid but it might lessen my update rate. And yeah typos are the products of my daily quota updates, and good idea! I have done it with the rescued civvies and all but ill work on your suggesrion. And how can I make it more 'immersive' to he u?
Okay thanks, ill be working on it. And other military vs fantsy? Please do share them to me!
Xboxgorgo18:Immersive? Well for starters, I still don't know what the Kingdom looks like in a detailed description. Also, I don't know if there are other Kingdoms or Major terriitories in the other world. Overall, try to make an in depth perception of the other world to make the readers know what kind of world the US is dealing with.
Let's not introduce nukes onto the fantasy world, it's overkill. Can we introduce demihumans like elves and monsters like orcs and goblins in the following chapters where they gonna meet with a recon team scouting the surrounding for other possible contacts except the Holy Kingdom (yeah that's what I like to call the first kingdom introduced)? Whether the demihumans accept the US is up to you. Also, can you show a scenario where the US also gets fascinated by magic of the other world and that they try to further study it in the dark (either by human mage dissection or other inhumane test in some sort of secret research facility)?
NlaEid:Okay thanks, ill be working on it. And other military vs fantsy? Please do share them to me!
At this rate I should hire you to be my assistant! (If you get the reference +1) But yup, other creatures will be in the story that much I can assure without spoiling. Recon teams meeting locals? Hm... if I do that it would feel like im copiying gate... i might have to think of another way.
Xboxgorgo18:Let's not introduce nukes onto the fantasy world, it's overkill. Can we introduce demihumans like elves and monsters like orcs and goblins in the following chapters where they gonna meet with a recon team scouting the surrounding for other possible contacts except the Holy Kingdom (yeah that's what I like to call the first kingdom introduced)? Whether the demihumans accept the US is up to you. Also, can you show a scenario where the US also gets fascinated by magic of the other world and that they try to further study it in the dark (either by human mage dissection or other inhumane test in some sort of secret research facility)?
How about changing it to a scout drone observing a demihuman (much to the suprise of yhe US since they haven't seen something other than humans in the fantasy world before) village under attack by a group of monsters and that they ordered a patrol team to investigate and if possible, make a friendly contact
NlaEid:At this rate I should hire you to be my assistant! (If you get the reference +1) But yup, other creatures will be in the story that much I can assure without spoiling. Recon teams meeting locals? Hm... if I do that it would feel like im copiying gate... i might have to think of another way.
Yup, thanks for the idea mate! Glad to see you're taking time to put in unput!
Xboxgorgo18:How about changing it to a scout drone observing a demihuman (much to the suprise of yhe US since they haven't seen something other than humans in the fantasy world before) village under attack by a group of monsters and that they ordered a patrol team to investigate and if possible, make a friendly contact
Also, remember not to skimp on using "FREEDOM AND DEMOCRACY" in every major battle!
NlaEid:Yup, thanks for the idea mate! Glad to see you're taking time to put in unput!
Hello, I have a quick question about the story; this a multi-POV story or is it all going through one MC / Character?
NlaEid:Hm, first of all thank you for this review and seconds ok I'll work on making the time-skips more fluid but it might lessen my update rate. And yeah typos are the products of my daily quota updates, and good idea! I have done it with the rescued civvies and all but ill work on your suggesrion. And how can I make it more 'immersive' to he u?
Multi-POV since you cant really see how a situation develops through one person only. And thank you for reading!
Juto:Hello, I have a quick question about the story; this a multi-POV story or is it all going through one MC / Character?
Thanks, at first I was going to wait until a response before reading, but in the end, I decided against and read anyway and have been enjoying my time so far.
NlaEid:Multi-POV since you cant really see how a situation develops through one person only. And thank you for reading!
Thank you! And please do enjoy!
Juto:Thanks, at first I was going to wait until a response before reading, but in the end, I decided against and read anyway and have been enjoying my time so far.
