The writing is good, but my criticism lies in the later chapers, in the early chapters his goal was first to avoid capture, and second to become a student in the acadamy. These aren't exactly long term goals but they built up exitment and created interesting situations. Now after that he's in his master's intense training and deadlines became that goal. But now the goal has slightly stagnated into formlessness. Please be sure to give him a big goal(besides divinity) and sub goals (like entering the acadamy). What does our MC want and what lengths will he go to get it? How does it chang him and the way he interacts with other people? How do other people's goals intersect / get in the way with his? **. Communication with the system is fun and I hope to learn more our our jaded system friend.
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Thanks for the review and feedback. I sort of realized diving into the 2nd volume that I had no idea where I was going. It was a lack of poor planning and outlining on my part as an ******* writer, which is why I plan to completely reboot the book from scratch in the future. If you like darker stories, then feel free to check out my 2nd novel where I don't make these mistakes. It's called Steampunk Apocalypse! Though funnily enough, I make some new mistakes in the earlier chapters, but overall, it's has much better writing/planning than Uniform System. Thanks for reading!
