webnovel
Ole_Tessmann
Ole_TessmannLv43mth
2024-08-09 07:35

The writing feels fake and unnatural. Like ai but at the some time not. Definitely still better than a lot of other fanfics on here. Can’t say much about the story line since I haven’t read much and won’t read more but toneri’s character just seems off. Not like a person that’s thousands of years old. The storyline back in his home worls is also bad, like hamura teaching him the ancient way of the ōtsutsuki but in reality just showing him how to manipulate chakra?? (Even tho he knew already) and teaching him shadow clone and then some bs about the tenseigan that didn’t make much sense. All in all probably an alright story to kill some time but not one where you desire to read more

Toneri in DC

Fredozy
3.4
79 Chs

Liked it!

LIKE
Replies1
Fredozy
FredozyAuthor

Thank you for the review

3mth
Other Reviews
Troy145
Troy145Lv4

no just no, you are just changing the original toneri, he never would protect the earth, even after losing to naruto he said moon will never come to earth but never said he will protect the earth, and you are making a character who doesn't care about humans in the slightest converting him into someone who cares about unknown people in a strange universe and become a cringe follower of justice league and toneri comes to the world of shinobi where basically kids are taught to kill and you are just making toneri acting friends with and saving strangers , out of character of real toneri

5mth

Zaylent
ZaylentLv4

the writing style is like written by AI. no hard feelings man, its just what I feel

4mth
LastGod
LastGodLv4

7000 year old god. put on a team with teenagers. So heres what we can rule out. Romance. Unless author wants MC in jail. Charater development. MC has seen so much that all thier teenage drama and BS will feel stupid to him. u can also rule out any interesting NEW stories. Cause of the power and age of MC he will likely not feel at all inclined to help the team unless they are in danger of dieing. Freindship. Hes so old that these young people will have NOTHING in common with him. Even comradery will not be in this because he will be holding his powerback and his emotions will not be moved by childrens struggles. You could have put him as the mentor of the team. But as a member make ZERO sense.

4mth
Lord_Y
Lord_YLv14

I like it so far just don’t like way Batman is portrayed as overly supicous to the point it comes out as kinda stupid. I mean he is suspicious of people but he is more secretive with it, not basically telling the person who he is suspicious of

4mth
Tasha_Williams_0673
Tasha_Williams_0673Lv1

Awesome novel so far. Already added to my library collection.

5mth
Artem_5195
Artem_5195Lv2

Please edit. Constant repetitions and AI writing style. Readable but annoying. People read to relax. Plus, the illusion works by interfering with consciousness, which can be noticed by a strong consciousness, so he used transformation to hide his eyes. And why hide? And a sage needs natural energy.

3mth
Enlighted1
Enlighted1Lv13

Story and the concept is good but the ai element in the novel is too much for me

2mth
joshua_arnold
joshua_arnoldLv14

so good 10/10 __________________________

2mth
KENZ_OO_YT
KENZ_OO_YTLv2

Hhhhhh I help you hhhhhhhhh[img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend]

4mth
Jethro24
Jethro24Lv4

More chapters please don’t drop this novel

1mth
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