The Sorcerer Wants the Marriage to Work

It was a game of cat and mouse, and XueYa would be lying if he didn't enjoy these kinds of games before getting down to business. It added to the mood. If only they could be playful about it!

But no. So far, LiangLin had tossed everything that wasn't bolted to the walls or flammable at him to the point he was sure he got at least two developing bumps over his head.

"My love-" XueYa ducked as a vase flew across the room, shattering against the wall. It must have cost a fortune. Poor YaYun and his priceless decorations.

"Go to hell!"

"Honey-" XueYa nearly got stabbed in the eye by a flying ink brush.

"Die, asshole!"

"Wifey-!" A scroll smacked XueYa in the face, shaking his teeth.

"I'm a man, you bastard! Call me wifey again, and I will shove this next scroll up your-"

"Ok! I'm sorry, my darling! Have mercy!" XueYa cried out.

Any more, and he would die from this assault. XueYa could use magic and subdue his bride, but it was unfair, and marriage was built on mutual understanding.

But man, if they started on the wrong foot!

And, well, this was a forced marriage. Sweet talking at this point wasn't getting him anywhere - except maybe to the grave earlier than planned.

LiangLin was flushed, his chest rising and lowering rapidly from his ragged breathing. A scroll was clasped in his hand, ready to be flung at XueYa if he tried to step closer.

They had been running around the table in circles after XueYa blocked the door from his escape. XueYa had pinned him against the door and tried to kiss him.

Thankfully, LiangLin's mother had taught them how to deal with the likes of XueYa since they were toddlers.

Twist and scram!

This asshole deserved to die! LiangLin had pinched XueYa's approaching nose and twisted it almost out of its perfect shape. Next would be his little brother if he dared pin LiangLin against a wall again!

A gentleman would at least push him against something soft like the bed. LiangLin didn't knee XueYa to hell out of kindness. The damn sorcerer should be crawling at his feet, begging for mercy! Maybe then he could consider the papapa- damn it! Why did he keep thinking about it?!

He flung the scroll at the unsuspecting XueYa, smacking him on the nose.

"I didn't even say anything this time!"

LiangLin hissed at him, baring his tiny fangs. Damn bastard didn't even have to say a thing, and LiangLin already considered the papapa. His first kiss was almost stolen by XueYa if he hadn't reacted fast enough.

This was bad. He had to get out!

LiangLin made a beeline towards the door, but XueYa caught him just as his fingers reached the wood. Strong arms wrapped around his waist, pressing his back flat against XueYa's chest.

"Look," XueYa's hot breath caressed LiangLin's exposed neck and ear, sending shivers running down his skin.

LiangLin was struggling and hissing at him like a beast. XueYa was just glad LiangLin didn't have his snake back yet, or he would be crushed by now.

"I think we started on the wrong foot-!"

LiangLin slammed on his toes with his heel, and XueYa nearly shouted out. His bride was too violent! Curse it, that XueYa liked it! If this was YaYun, he would have run for the doors by now with a lover like LiangLin.

"Let's both calm down and talk about this."

"Talk to the wall!"

"My love, calm down. I want to make this marriage work."

LiangLin halted, his ears burning brightly. He no longer tried to wriggle free, but he refused to turn and look at XueYa.

XueYa let out a relieved breath. His toes were safe, for now. He was just glad LiangLin was willing to listen. All hope was not lost.

"LiangLin," XueYa whispered, leaning his chin over LiangLin's shoulder.

His hands ran over the slim waist, itching to undo the sash keeping the hanfu in place. The fragrance of sweet roses and subtle wafts of wine was intoxicating, and XueYa wanted to fall asleep to the scent surrounding him. It was perfect, just like his bride.

"I-"

The doors were suddenly kicked in before XueYa could finish his sentence and the royal guards poured in. Yu Zhong was the first to grab XueYa by his collar, shaking him off the white snake.

"What the -" XueYa said as Yu Zhong dragged him out the door.

"Oi, it's the wedding tradition, your highness," Wei KaiJun said, winking at the brightly blushing LiangLin. "Drink yourself under the table before we let you crawl back to the bride."

"I can't get drunk!" XueYa was a sorcerer and the kind that had become immune to most poisons and liquor. He couldn't drink himself under the table even if he wanted to, and the guards were aware of this.

Damn zodiacs! If he didn't know the guards since they were kids and this being the dragon gods' tradition, he would have minced them all into a stew!

"That's not our problem," Zhi ChangNing shrugged as she trailed after the ox, and the three disappeared into the setting sun. "This is tradition."

"Are you ok, LiangLin?" Xie JingYi asked, his eyes crinkling with worry as he looked around the desolated room and all the broken furniture and decorations. "He didn't touch you, did he?"

"Damn, you two are more like enemies than lovers," Wei KaiJun let out a low whistle as he kicked the few scrolls by his feet. "Just try not to break too much stuff. YaYun likes this room. Try to break his balls for a change."

"Are you going to make him drink under the table before coming back?" LiangLin asked and instantly regretted letting the words slip. Both guards exchanged knowing looks, a smile forming on their lips.

"You don't want him to drink?" Xie JingYi teased the flustered snake.

"Oi, I think he is just afraid XueYa can't get drunk. So he won't come back the entire night."

"Shut up!" LiangLin snarled. As if he wanted his husband - no! - that damn sorcerer to come back home early! Drink himself to the coffin, yes, that's right! Choke on that wine!

"Oi, calm down. We are just teasing you," Wei KaiJun said as servants appeared by the door, carrying with them trunks of goods inside.

LiangLin eyed the boxes with curiosity when Xie JingYi said,

"It's the wedding gifts from the officials, us… and your sisters."

"My sisters?" Since when did any of his sisters have the time to buy gifts? They were always together.

"Yes," Wei KaiJun hurried to say as he took hold of Xie JingYi and pushed him out the door. "Have fun going through them. We will keep XueYa busy. You will get to sleep in peace tonight."

"...!" LiangLin's blush feathered down his neck, but he stayed quiet as the doors pulled close behind KaiJun.

XueYa could drink all he wanted, LiangLin wasn't there to stop him. But at least let his husband end up sleeping on a bed by the end of the day. These guards were too careless!

LiangLin's eyes trailed over the boxes covered in red wedding papers, wondering what his sisters had gifted him.

With an excited smile, LiangLin flipped the boxes open, marvelling at all the fine jewellery, clothes and… more pregnancy medication and herbs. Goddamnit! He would shove all these dried roots down XueYa's throat once he came back!