Mischief Maker

Not too far away from Ilu-inọ is a district village with a population of above 400 and the major occupation of the people in that village is farming and keeping out the pests. "The pest," in the person of a stubborn boy called Oluṣeyi from the village of Ilu-inọ, it's a pity that they have no idea of exactly when the so-called stubborn boy is bound to strike or the fact that he has already put his sinister plan into motion

The market day is a special day when all the women of the village, present their goods to the public in order to sell and make money to feed their families. Some merchants who have travelled from a distant land take advantage of the occasion to introduce new products to the people and to buy some goods in order to sell to distant lands. Some foolish men also take advantage of the market day to hustle easy money through devious means, one of the reasons why Oluṣeyi decided to grace the occasion with his presence.

The boy stood before a crowd, he had a very devious smile on his face completely un-intimidated by the number of people gazing at him. He is dressed in a simple yellow Buba and Sokoto, the Sokoto jumped all the way up to his knees, according to the fashion of all warriors; this is none other than Oluṣeyi the boy who vanquished the evil Agbako at the age of 12

"Ẹ ka a san ẹyin eyan mi (good afternoon, my people)" he greeted with a deceptive smile "ladies and gentlemen ẹyinara, it is my pleasure to introduce you to the hungriest glutton in the whole of Yoruba land, the magnificent bottomless pit, the powerhouse of digestion, the ugly Akin!"

As Ṣeyi introduced his best friend, the curtains that concealed him was suddenly raised, revealing Akin the hunchback, and those present gasped in shock, after all, Akin is by far the most hideous human being to ever walk the face of the earth. If you think he was ugly before then you will not be able to even dream about how ugly he is now, over the past two seasons Akin's skin has grown tougher, his hunch back two sizes bigger than it used to be and his entire body shape twisted beyond description to make things worse, he grew hair all over his body. This created the impression that Akin the hunchback is more an animal than a man, and he has the bad habit of scratching his bald head with the tree stubs he calls fingers. Akin still uses rags to cover his body because of the difficulty in finding clothes that can fit him and the people of the village still treat him like a disease, everyone except Ṣeyi.

The reaction that Ṣeyi had expected, occurred, the people though intimidated by Akin's ugliness refused to back down from the challenge, in fact, they considered him an insult to their esteemed reputation.

"So you brought this Abuke (a person who cannot stand up straight) here to show off his eating ability," someone asked

"Yes!" Ṣeyi replied with his usual smile "that's why this is called an eating competition"

"Then I the great "Koyo" challenge him for his title as the champion"

The people of the village cheered for the newcomer clapping their hands and chanting his name "Koyo!! Koyo!! Koyo!! Koyo!!"

"You do know you must pay a gate fee to enter this eating competition," Ṣeyi said

"How much," he asked

"Five beads!" Ṣeyi replied

"I challenge him as well," another spoke

"And me" the third voiced

Ṣeyi looked greedily at all the challengers laughing at them in his mind. If only they knew, whom they are up against, they would have fled for the hills immediately.

"We can't lose" he rejoiced subconsciously

The table was set within 10 minutes and all the contestants were presented with mountain heaps of pounded yam and plates vegetable soup each.

"Ready! Go!!" Seyi admonished in a commanding tone

That is how the feasting began; Akin easily bested all the other competitors within the first hour. The one they called Koyo did not even last as long as Ṣeyi had wanted, and then to give the other contestants a handicap Ṣeyi allowed others to compete against Akin knowing fully well that the hunchback is well adapted to his role as an official glutton. The reason why Ṣeyi is able to convince other would be mugus (suckers) to compete in the eating contest is through the prize money of five strings which he had raised during the cause of the contest. Many of the latter contestants struggled with their meal hoping against hope that Akin would give-up eventually, some even agreed to compete in turns that way the last man would be the one who would win the prize and share it with the others, a foolish notion.

Akin, on the other hand, was enjoying himself, as soon as he finished one plate, he simply raised his hands and signalled for another, it does not matter how many may try to defeat him in this contest the only thing that matters is how much food he puts into his stomach before his period elapses. The regular cycle of his digestion has changed and he knows it, the only way to justify it is to adapt to its demands.

"Will this boy ever be filled?" One out of the people inquired

"I'm just surprised that he's still eating" another observed

The last man standing against Akin had the look of one who's fighting the urge to throw up, the desperate need to win the prize money had blinded him to his bodily discomfort. The cook served the final meal a plate of Jollof rice, moimoi and chicken wings, for the first time Akin's face became pale. He looked at the wing as though he is looking at his death wish, Ṣeyi was so caught up with how much he is making neglected to follow up on one minor detail.

"Ṣeyi," Akin called

"What is it Akin!" Ṣeyi replied in an irritated tone "can't you see that we are making a lot of money"

"Ṣeyi" Akin called again "there is a bird wing in my rice" he voiced to Ṣeyi's horror

"Yeeee!!!" Ṣeyi exclaimed, "Why in the world does this haft to happen," he thought silently. The truth is, ever since the first mission, Ṣeyi had taken it upon himself to observe Akin's digestive behaviour. The frequency of Akin's eating habit, the changes in his feeding rate and his growth due to his feeding habit. All this Ṣeyi had observed for the past 2 seasons. At first, there was no time that Akin would not ask for food, but later, after three market days he started eating once every 3 days, then every 5 days, later Akin started eating once every market day. Then the strangest thing happened, the once all-consuming digestive system started to become selective, now Akin eats once every 25 days, which is equal to 3 market days and for some strange reason Akin can no longer eat anything that grows feathers which includes eggs, chicken, Guinea fowl and even the duck. Ṣeyi can still remember the day he convinced Akin into eating the lap of a hen, Akin spent the next few hours throwing up gallons load of blood from his indigestion, a horrific experience he has no intention of repeating.

"I have an idea" Ṣeyi whispered to his best friend

"Tell Me," Akin said

"Act as though you want to throw up hit the plate and allow for the meal to spill, leave the meat for me" Ṣeyi replied

Pretending is one of Akin's best talents. He simply gave out one of his most irritating coughs, he had and then he pushed the rice aside deliberately, intending to spill the entire contents of the calabash on the floor. Akin used so much force that instead of spilling the meal, he sent the calabash plate flying and thus Ṣeyi easily plucked the wing from the air without anyone noticing. The people were so busy observing Akin's momentary spasm that they completely missed Ṣeyi's quick move on the meat, within the next second the meat was gone Akin caught the calabash and devoured all that remained of the rice and thus the whole incident was covered. Akin's final opponent eventually gave up and thus Akin became the winner of the eating contest to Ṣeyi's relief.

"Ẹyin eyan me (my people) I present to you the winner of today's contest and still the undisputed champion, Akin! The bottomless pit!" Ṣeyi pronounced

Those who were impressed, gave a loud round of applauds, after all, it's not easy for a human being to eat all the way from dawn to dusk and remain whole, "Come on Akin, wave" Ṣeyi admonished, encouraging his friend to gain crowd support. The whole event would have gone well but there was one thing that Ṣeyi didn't put into account, it is the boy who sat in a tree closer to where the just concluded eating contest was held and he saw what happened to the chicken wing.

"It's a lie" the boy shouted to the shock of all, no one expected this turn of events and for a short moment there was a little confusion

"What do you mean," one of the villagers asked

"The hunchback did not eat the meat! Ask the boy in yellow, he kept it in his pocket" The boy in the tree replied.

This led to a lot of confusion among the people, while some were in favour of Akin eating the meat others were sceptical, one question led to another and finally, they started to doubt the authenticity of Akin's performance.

"They are cheats!" The boy pressed, "That monster (Akin) did not eat the chicken meat, I saw it"

"Is this true?" One of the villagers inquired of Ṣeyi "were you cheating?"

"Why would we cheat?" Ṣeyi said in a convincing tone, "we were just..."

"Empty your pockets now!" The second person commanded, followed by the abuses of several market women who have already concluded that they are guilty.

"Akin!" Ṣeyi said in a controlled even tone

"Yes?"

"Can you run?"

"Yes!"

"Runnnnnnn!!" Ṣeyi shouted

The two boys sprinted towards the forest in order to escape their current predicament aware of the fact that if they should make the mistake of getting caught, they might not live to tell the tale. What was once an attentive audience had now become an angry mob. "Get them," the spokesperson shouted, gesturing towards the two boys who were running away.

Ṣeyi is well aware of the consequences of their actions, should he be caught and simply ignored it. Akin needs to eat and he needs more money, so the risk is worth it. However, who would be foolish enough to risk being beating stupid by an angry mob and then as an example to others, they would burn him alive, none other than Oluṣeyi the biggest nuisance Ilu-ino ever had.

"Ṣeyi they're gaining on us!" Akin said in a panicky tone

"I know! I know!! Keep running!!!" Ṣeyi replied

As Ẹṣọs, Ṣeyi and Akin had all the advantage they could fight their way to freedom, but the rules guiding their actions are not that simple. All warriors are meant to use their strength during official missions. Therefore, they are not allowed to use their strength as warriors during social visits or for personal vendetta, also if they should use their strength as warriors then by one means or another, the Balogun would find out. If there is anything that Ṣeyi does not want it is an angry Balogun. So running is the best option.

"Akin I have an idea," Ṣeyi said suddenly, "once we get far enough into the forest will make a quick right turn to escape their view and then jump into the trees!" Ṣeyi prompted.

Akin complied immediately, even though the angry mob found it difficult to catch up with the two young warriors the moment the two boys left the village and reached the thickest part of the forest they made a sharp right turn then jumped into the trees away from the sight of the angry villagers.

If Ṣeyi has the chance to evaluate his so-called progress as a master of mischief, he would definitely give himself the highest score "I'm the best" he said shaking his bag of money "there's no one better than me".