Same, Yet Different

Staring at the ceiling, I shifted my body to the side and reached out for my phone.

===================

 Friday, April 16

 8:24 AM

 - 5 unread messages.

===================

Checking the time, I continued lying in bed.

'Sigh.'

I relented, now that I had calmed down after a pleasant sleep. I began to analyze what I had experienced the previous night.

Firstly, there seemed to be something wrong with my memory. I couldn't deny the fact that the flashbacks I had seen yesterday were just lucid dreams.

If I couldn't recall my appearance, my identity, or my family, then it was highly likely that I wouldn't be able to see their appearances in the flashbacks either, since I had forgotten everything related to them.

However, that still didn't explain the fact that I couldn't see my reflection in the mirror.

'Just what is that mysterious mist?' I wondered inwardly, unaware that someone had been continuously sending me messages.

There was also the occurrence of my father vanishing into thin air, leaving no clues behind.

That's not to mention the strange presence of the gold particles he left behind, in which I didn't pay much attention to, although I couldn't understand why.

"Nothing seems to add up," I muttered while clutching my head with one hand as I stared at the ceiling.

"It's just not plausible."

Even though I had come to accept my current situation, I couldn't believe that everything I had witnessed had happened.

It simply defied scientific possibility, leading my mind to generate countless other theories.

"When did I become so fixated on scenarios that can be explained scientifically?"

Right...

Because I have forgotten my own identity, I don't even know what kind of person I am. My likes and dislikes are a mystery to me. It feels as though I am a chess piece being moved unconsciously in a certain direction.

However, one thing is certain to me.

I dislike this reality.

I don't know why, but that thought kept recurring in my mind.

'Sigh.' 

Once again, I let out a deep sigh to myself.

As I closed my eyes, attempting to let go of everything that had happened before, a wave of excruciating pain washed over my head. The intensity of the pain was so unbearable that I couldn't help but let out an involuntary hiss.

Simultaneously, my vision distorted, and a flood of images began to appear before my eyes. It felt as though someone or something was forcefully shoving information into my head, overwhelming my senses.

After what felt like an eternity, the pain finally subsided. My entire body was drenched in cold sweat and my bed was now thoroughly soaked.

"Haah.. Haah.." Take a long, soothing breath. 

I sit up straight and sweep my gaze across my surroundings.

Instead of the messy room that was there before, what appears before me now is a clean and tidy space.

The beer cans and half-eaten food on the tables are nowhere to be seen.

The floor is now spotless without any trace of scattered clothes, broken bottles, or papers that were previously strewn around. In stark contrast to the room I had yesterday.

Blinking my eyes a couple of times, I got up from my bed and made my way to the bathroom. Each step I took felt light, and the sound of my heart beating echoed in my ears.

The influx of information that had been forced upon me revealed a world vastly different from my original reality.

Trials.

Beasts.

Soul energy.

The list goes on.

It feels as though I have transmigrated into a light novel.

With this thought in mind, I knew to myself that I was going to start a new life here, in a world different from the one I used to live in. This realization filled me with a mix of excitement and anxiety. 

There is however a pressing issue surrounding this entire situation.

'Are the pieces of information provided to me credible? And who exactly is the source of this information?' These thoughts arise within me as I arrive at the bathroom doors.

-Clank!

Taking a deep, mindful breath, I opened the door and stepped into the bathroom.

Inside, I could still see the cutter and the lingering stains of blood in the basin, confirming what I had done the previous day.

I slowly lifted my gaze to the mirror and took a good look at my reflection.

The mysterious mist that used to obstruct my face was no more.

Instead, I saw a clear reflection of myself, revealing my authentic appearance.

Jet black hair styled in a layered bowl cut, complemented by my Asian facial features and deep obsidian eyes. While I was dressed in a simple white shirt devoid of any design, paired with sports shorts.

In terms of height, I could be described as average, standing at 174 cm. As for my weight, it appeared to be neither too fat nor too skinny.

As I assessed my overall appearance, I couldn't help but admit if there was one word to describe it.

It would be "average" in terms of charm.

"...." I was momentarily left speechless as my jaw hung open, trying to process the reality of my appearance.

While I had expected that I could now see my true appearance, what left me utterly dumbfounded was the realization that I resembled an Asian despite having American-blooded parents.

After coming to that realization, my pupils shrank.

'Does that mean that, my memories were fabricated?'

There are a lot of possible speculations that I can come up with currently but first and foremost, I would need to check something.

Taking off my white shirt, I examined my body in the reflection.

As I would expect, I don't have any muscles whatsoever.

It was not surprising since I had never engaged in workouts or exercises that would have developed my musculature.

Taking a closer look at my body, I found a scar at the right bottom of my abdomen.

It's the scar that was left behind after the car accident I went through, and it is also proof that the flashbacks I've seen aren't something fabricated.

However, I can't be sure of myself at the current moment.

'What if someone just manipulated my memories?'

The introduction of soul energy into the world granted people powers derived from the trials.

Hence I am not certain about my speculations at the moment. However, I need to remind myself not to trust too much about the information that is currently within me.

'One step at a time.' I reminded myself while taking a deep, soothing breath. 

'Speculating right now won't go anywhere.' I mumbled to myself before my phone rang in the room.

-Biz.. Biz..

Reaching my phone which was lying on the bed, I took a glance at who called my number.

=============

122-XXXX-XXXX 

Olivia Everhart ( Mother )

> Accept call

> Decline call

=============

Taking a glance at who called me, I felt a wave of dread wash over me, knowing that it would likely lead to another round of headaches.

Quite literally.

Before I could even finish my thoughts, my body unconsciously shuddered, I instinctively clutched my head with trembling hands.

"Haa... already... haaa. expected another one..." I tiredly muttered to myself. I place both of my hands on the wall to support my body.

How many headaches was that?

3 times.

The first time was when I was within the flashback, the next was when I came to this world, and finally, recalling who I am.

Disregarding my thoughts for now, I clicked the accept call button on my phone.

"Why didn't you reply to my messages, sweetie? And why did it take you so long to pick up your phone?" Her voice pierced through my ears with her tone filled with genuine concern.

Her smooth and soothing voice gradually eased my racing thoughts.

As her resonating voice enveloped the room, I felt myself starting to regain a sense of calm.

I took a deep breath, trying to hold back my emotions and forcefully regain my composure.

It had been so long since the last time I heard my mother's voice.

"Hello... sweetie? Are you there?" Her familiar voice rang out once again, resonating in my ears.

I gripped my phone tightly with one of my trembling hands and managed to muster a quiet response.

"Hi..."

"What's wrong? Did you get bullied at the academy?" she responded immediately.

Right.

I should be attending an academy at the moment.

Taking a deep breath, I answered back. "Nothing... I haven't been bullied before the first day even begins."

There was a brief moment of silence that hung in the air between us.

Just as she was about to respond, I interrupted her, the words escaping from my trembling lips.

"Mother... can I visit home?"

"Of course, sweetie," she replied with warmth and affection in her voice.

"Remember, Robin, you are my beloved son." 

"I don't care what others think about you." her tone turned serious, yet unwavering. "Just know that your family will forever stand by your side."

Taking a deep, mindful breath, I attempted to calm the raging emotions threatening to burst out.

The road I've walked has been very tiring.

The immense frustration, helplessness, and pain that I have suppressed within me.

There were times when I wanted to kill myself. Yet, I found myself unable to follow through.

I would never be able to forgive myself for leaving my unconscious mother behind.

"...." There was a brief silence, as my eyes welled up with tears. 

"Are you feeling better now?"

I bit my lips as tears streamed down my face.

I tried to hold back my emotions as much as I could, but I felt like I needed a way to release these bottled emotions.

The loss of my younger brother and stepmother, the absence of my father, and my comatose mother.

Everyone around me deliberately avoided my presence. Likely due to the unfortunate events that have unfolded in my life.

People avoided me like a plague, wondering who would be the next victim.

I constantly deceived myself that everything was fine and that all would eventually end well.

Days turned into weeks, weeks into months, and months into years. It was only then that I finally realized that I had a job.

This constant avoidance and isolation took a toll on my professional life. I found myself losing my job repeatedly due to my underwhelming performance, as the fear and distance from others hindered my ability to excel.

The recent inexplicable occurrences that plagued my life had pushed me dangerously close to the brink of a mental breakdown.

The fear of losing all connection to my beloved family and my own identity weighed heavily on my mind, creating a constant sense of unease and anxiety.

The traumatic accident that haunts me to this day only added to the overwhelming burden I carried.

Transmigrating into an unknown world, coupled with memories whose origins remained a mystery, only intensified my constant sense of unease and anxiety. 

Yet, once again, I deceived myself that everything was fine and all would eventually end well.

-Huuu... Huuu...

My breaths became ragged, as I tightly gripped the phone in my hand, causing cracks to appear on its screen.

Overwhelmed by the weight of my thoughts, I instinctively clutch my head with my other hand, feeling as if my mental barriers were slowly crumbling.

"Robin?.."

Finally, unable to bear the burden any longer, my trembling voice called out desperately.

"Mom.. I... need.. help. Please."

...

30 minutes later.

"Are you sure, you're fine now sweetie?" My mother asked.

"All good, I felt much better now."

"That's good to hear," she replied with a tone of relief.

"I'll see you soon, sweetie."

"Alright. Mom.." I responded with a smile, as this was the first time in a while that I had a bright smile on my face.

Ever since the traumatic accident, I had never smiled.

My stepmother always tried to cheer me up, but I always carried a gloomy aura around me.

-Du...Du...Du...

"Haaa... that was embarrassing."

I completely lost myself there, as I could only bitterly shake my head in response. I felt an intense desire to bury myself in the ground.

Disregarding what happened earlier, I began to plan the next course of action.

...

After what seemed like an agonizing hour, I decided to go check the public library.

'I need to check the information relating to the memories that are within me.'

Just in case, this information within my head is trying to harm me in any other way. 

I cannot take any chances or risk the possibility, as there is always that possibility.

Walking towards my table, I grabbed my key card and finally noticed my finger.

To my surprise, it was now fully healed. It had only taken one night's sleep for my finger to completely heal.

'Interesting..' I mused as I took a look at my fingertip.

This was the first time I had witnessed such a rapid recovery. In the world I used to reside in, it would take days to experience the same level of recovery.

"Who am I kidding? This world has magic, for god sake." I relented as I shook my head. Common sense doesn't apply to this world anymore.

Things like surviving a nuke are as easy as using a defensive soul link.

Arriving in front of the door, I take off the black coat that is hanging on the door hangers and put it on before leaving my room with a loud bang.

...

Stepping out of the elevator, I walk further down the corridor until I find myself in a spacious lobby.

Glancing around, my attention is immediately drawn to the right side, where a beautifully crafted reception desk stands right before me.

Shifting my gaze to the left side, I notice three inviting double couches arranged in a cozy manner. A generously sized table takes center stage, adorned with a tasteful vase housing a bouquet of fresh flowers, which fills the air with a delicate fragrance.

Above me, majestic chandeliers hang from the ceiling, casting a warm and enchanting glow.

"Huuu..." I exhaled out and took my step towards the exit of the lobby.

What greeted me was the same urban city that I used to live in. Just like before, skyscrapers lined the streets as far as the eye could see.

Instead of people wearing normal clothes, many of the people in this world are dressed in robes, armor, or outfits that are reminiscent of those that can be seen in games or movies.

As a result, my clothes seemed to be out of place.

Yet, what truly amazed me was the absence of cars and the familiar beeping sounds.

Instead, I witnessed people traveling in floating bubbles.

The floating bubbles looked to be enclosed with one-way glass, perhaps that these materials were used to construct them.

I don't know, I'm just speculating at that point. 

However, this world turned out to be drastically different from what I had initially imagined.

'I suppose... this is soul world.'

The world felt the same, yet different at the same time.

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