So Eun saw a lot of various things, as naive as a child, and being confused about everything he heard and saw. When he turned at the age of ten, a simple celebratory event took place in the So Clans while his parents are there. Servants, disciples, and relatives. So Eun thought about it a lot.
Like how they gave him the spotlight the whole day, how his Father took extra cautiousness just to wipe his sweat. How the servants and disciples didn't come near him. His so-called relatives never gave him a word and instead discuss something with his parents. So Eun didn't quite know the word birthday, but he learned that that was the most special day of a person's life.
And celebrating your birthday, was one of the reasons for the celebrant to feel loved, cherished, and happy. So Eun might not understand the word happiness, but he's quite sure himself, that happiness didn't stay long inside him.
When the event ended, all those feelings he anticipated for his birthday, was just a mere illusion of someone. Someone who wants to make his birthday a bit special. Someone like So Eun.
But then, the consequences of expecting are uncertain and risky, it either goes on your way to fulfillment or the path of disappointment.
Since then, he hadn't believed in that word anymore. The happiness of the characters he desired in his book of pages, was just a play-things for kids to hope for nothing.
He locked himself in his room for a week, like how he'd done it for all his ten years shut and closed off from the outside world.
His parents kept him hidden in their estate, for the sole reason of keeping him safe and away from bad people. Until now, So Eun still thought of it. For how many days and nights he contemplated, the answer came in a form of tears staining his cheeks.
Maybe he isn't like any of them. Maybe he was different from them. He realized that night, with a heavy heart, that 'I am different' will always end up with 'I don't belong'
So Eun thought a lot of things until he fell into a deep sleep.
~~~
In the middle of the night, the sorrowful wind made the dangling spirit bells rung, and that also made So Eun pried his eyes open.
A strange noise came from above him. Purposely hitting his roof with numerous distinct taps, and little by little, those faint taps became harsher and louder.
So Eun observed the bamboo ceiling, constructing schemes in his head on where to dash off and scream for help if the odd patter sounds lift off his ceiling.
When he heard that no one reacted from outside his room, no one had come to comfort him, peacefully quiet as if So Eun was just dreaming it on. Instinctively, he runs his way out of the door, even though his Mother constantly scolded him not to run around the household, So Eun twisted the door knob and went outside.
And what he saw from outside the fields, made him freeze on the spot. Below the canopy of his room, in front of him were the garden fields laid upon. An open area where he can stargaze at night and greet the sun at day.
Despite it being dark and quiet. The pit-pat of the rain created a serene ambiance. The luminescent glow of the moon helped So Eun to figure the little droplets of water cascading.
Because of that breathtaking scenery, So Eun couldn't help to reach out his hand. After that, his movements came along swiftly as he let himself feel the rain for the first time.
With no one but the moon to accompany him, the burden in his chest somehow withered out of nowhere, he pried his arms, as if welcoming the mere existence of the rain into his mediocre life.
So Eun never stopped thinking about everything. With a constant longing to discover something new each day and night, at the same time, scurrying away from the inevitable path he might encounter. After all, the world is too big for him, despite his mind threatening him, he still believed.
He felt his anguish was washed away by the rain, finally found something to soothe his heart, So Eun smiled through the rain.
And that night, a flower danced in the rain with the twinkle of stars gazing at him. Where he woke up the night after, feeling the headaches.
~~~
In the afternoon, with no errands he would have to do, So Eun happily wandered around the fields for an hour now, hands clasped on his back while he pondered in front of the flowers. Watering them during his morning walk, and secretly eyeing all sorts of flowers that suit his taste.
He stayed on the fields even when the disciples called him to eat, promising shortly to follow after he's done appreciating the beautiful blossoms in the garden.
But after a while of looking for something, his hands couldn't pick up a certain flower that fits his liking.
So Eun helplessly sat down at the fields, his two limbs stretched out, and hands supporting his weight. He watched the feathers of the clouds slowly drifting apart, losing himself at the moment.
"Morning dew's my favorite." The giggles of a young disciple sounded on the corridor.
So Eun overheard them and let his eyelids drop in the meantime, and the voices became his background music.
"Did you read books again? Your vocabulary today is ridiculous, no one even understands you."
"No way. Do you think I'm doing this for them? Of course not, I'm challenging myself."
"What's the point of having a wide vocabulary if no one understands your wordings?"
"Please stop looking down on yourself, just say that you're uneducated and can't comprehend. It's easy if we see it that way." So Eun opened his eyes at that and turned around to look at them.
He saw two boys, seemingly the same age as him, standing in front of his room.
"You're going too rude again, Jaebin." The other one's tone gets a little off, and So Eun instantly sensed something coming.
"I'm not, you gotta study and read books too. In that way, I won't criticize you anymore." Just from that alone, So Eun remembered something he heard from the old ladies who are cleaning his room once.
"The Gim Family, with their first son that is spoiled and inherited his father's bad temperament, I didn't know what good traits' the Sect Master was referring to, to be accepted on one of the disciples of the So Clan." So Eun back then was playing outside his room and overheard their conversations.
"Right, I can even list another opposing trait that contrasts to their Father, just by looking at his two children. One, Jaebin wasn't even a good brother to his blood-related sibling. Two, Yeonbin never called him out and still received his brother's insults. I don't understand what's with this Gim Family, that Sect Master took a liking of."
His thoughts ended when the two siblings started to playfully push each other's shoulders, So Eun leaves it as 'playfully' because they wouldn't be smiling if they were fighting.
After observing them for a while, he also couldn't ponder how these two work together, and why his Father took them as one of the disciples of their Clan.
Because these days, The So Clan as the third major clan of the cultivation world will mostly accept pupils from their relatives and those who had high cultivation. And the Gim Clan's reputation wasn't even high at cultivation, neither does being their relative.
Nonetheless, So Eun still didn't get it and closed his eyes again. Forgetting them for a moment. He tried not to pay attention and sit silently on the grass.
"Whatever, I don't know what is morning dew, but The Story-Teller of the Decade came here to tell his tales and legends. Let's hear it!" The two young lads agreed on something before racing off their way at the back of So Clan's Pavilion.
So Eun lifted his body and looked back only to see no one. After contemplating, he decided to follow and attend to this so-called Story-Teller of the Decade, so he stood up and slapped the dirt that clung to his robes. That title was cringed and ridiculous, who even knows if he stayed as a story-teller after a decade?
So Eun originally thought to browse his books after failing to find a flower, but when he heard their discussion, he promptly changed plans and chose to hear some tales that a story-teller prepared for.
So he stood up and followed the two boys, promising himself to do what he's been doing afterward.
How are you guys doing? I hope you've spent the new year just enough for you to feel happy.
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